A Labyrinth

Wedding season is kind of like hunting season. Except I think I am the hunted.

For those of you who are not well versed in Orthodox Judaism, there are many times when one is forbidden to get married because we are in a state of mourning for something or another (people don’t like us so much). We just finished one such period and as people like to get married in the summer and there will be an additional three weeks at the end of the summer when couples do not get married, these next three months will be packed with weddings. I am not complaining. I like weddings.

It started with a bang with my friend Shosh. She is the old roommate of my friend Batel. I met Shosh on my pilot trip. She took care of me my first night here because Batel was at a Madonna concert in Tel Aviv. I am very grateful. She also was good company throughout the trip and her and her now husband showed me what type of awesome people make Aliyah. Naturally, striving to be as awesome as her, I made Aliyah. The wedding was fantastic. It was at a beautiful hall in the middle of nowhere. I took a lot of great pictures, ate awesome food and hung out with special people. I also fell flat on my butt running after my friend to wash my hands to eat. I only hurt my pride and it was super funny. There was a girl who did awesome hula hoop stunts and a group of girls that danced a Bollywood type dance. It was super fun. I also got a great Bracha (blessing) from the bride. She blessed me that I would wake up every morning and think that Aliyah was the best decision I ever made, that I would have the merit to get married and have children in Israel. I drank segulah wine. I danced.

Tomorrow morning I am going to another wedding. I was invited on Shabbat last week. I also met this bride on my pilot trip and she is part of the same group of friends. She only got engaged in April but she has been dating her man on and off for five years. She told me her story and I am so happy that they have managed to make it work now because it is quite a fairy tale. I am trying to convince her to write it.

In this week’s Parsha, Behaalotcha, Miriam is punished for speaking against Moshe about his Kushite (black or Ethiopian) wife. The commentators say that Moshe separated from his wife Zipporah because of his holiness and she was bemoaning the fact that other prophets had appeared in the camp and she was worried that they too would separate from their wives. I have always thought this was referring to Zipporah but there is one commentator who points out that it never mentions her name and it could be in fact a different woman. He says that Moshe would not have been the greatest prophet to live had he separated from his wife. Judaism, as a general rule, does not support rejecting the physical for the spiritual but rather making the physical spiritual.

The Children of Israel complain in this week’s Parsha that they don’t have meat. It says they lusted for it. In fact some commentators say that they were not just lusting after food but allowing themselves to lust in general. They said they got fish in Egypt for free. Free? Free of mitzvot, free of obligations to God. Their desires were not curbed by God in Egypt. God sends the slav (quail) for them to eat. They complained and they got, what kind of lesson is that? Well they gorged and it was bad for them. The lesson to take from here is that if God gives us what we ask for arbitrarily, whether or not it is good for us, that is bad too. We must be measured and careful with our actions. We must be careful to ask God to help us walk in his path and give us the tools to be fulfilled holy people.

I hope that I will be strong enough to be the type of Jew who makes the physical spiritual, does not lust after things and gorge to excess and prays only to walk in the path of God.

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