Construction workers in Boston have stumbled upon a 19th-century shipwreck, an unusual find—at least on land. Apparently it was buried more than a century ago as the city filled in swampy areas to create more real estate.

Welcome to Big Time Small-Time Dicks, a regular column on The Slot that explores local politicians, small-town scandals, and everything else making life miserable on a local level. Know a small time person who is a big time dick we should feature? Email us.

Welp, here it is: Donald Trump, a monument to human hubris crafted out of rotting Spam, has gone from presumptive nominee to actual nominee. Republicans, here is your bed, and we hope you enjoy lying in it.

Last weekend and through the week, Elijah Wood brought the issue of pedophilia in Hollywood into the spotlight again by talking about the prevalence and many victims of child predators. Expanding on that, former child actor Corey Feldman went into further grim detail and spoke directly about his own abuse in a recent…

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What can your pussy do?

Amidst the excitement over Disney’s live-action Beauty and the Beast, the titan of childhood whimsy has also revealed plans for a live-action version of The Little Mermaid—which would then be competing with Universal’s live-action Little Mermaid, starring Chloe Grace Moretz.

On June 17, 2015, white supremacist Dylann Roof gunned down a congregation at Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church, leaving nine dead. Now federal prosecutors are pursuing the death penalty against him, and the families of the victims accept this measure. Some, in fact, welcome it.

Ouch.

The Obama family has settled on their post-White House residence, which means it’s time to pass judgment on their choice.

Courtney Stodden’s pregnancy—which we’re going to assume is real for the sake of women supporting women—is off to a rough start.

In today’s Tweet Beat, Ariana Grande is coming down with something, Abbi Jacobson wonders about My Best Friend’s Wedding, and the always exceptional looking Jax Taylor has some unsolicited grooming advice for women.

The cast of the Ghostbusters reboot stopped by Ellen on Wednesday, leading to a delightful moment in which Saturday Night Live’s Leslie Jones almost brought Kate McKinnon, Kristen Wiig, and Melissa McCarthy to the point of crying laughter with her recollections of her former job as a Scientology telemarketer.

Rila Fukushima is joining the American film adaptation of the manga series Ghost in the Shell, which has already drawn criticism over its choice to cast Scarlett Johansson as the cyborg-fighter lead character.

If this quote, Instagrammed Wednesday by one Britney Jean Spears, makes it seem like our favorite smiler bought a cultural studies textbook and started playing telephone with herself in the privacy of her own consciousness, that’s because that’s exactly what she’s doing.