Week of July 17

Now the White House is staging theme weeks, starting today with "Made in America." The director of media affairs says that the U.S. sets "the world standard for quality and craftsmanship." Especially compared to the competition! When asked if that meant that Trump products would be made here, and whether Ivanka got the memo, she said, "We'll get back to you on that."

Buy, Buy American Pie
[ American Pie ]

See a live performance video on YouTube. From the album Campaign and Suffering (2008).

Week of July 10

After meeting Putin at the G-20 summit, Donald Trump announced his brilliant plan for cybersecurity: team up with Russia! They're the experts! It will be "impenetrable"! Then the president backed off, following the lukewarm response, and said he didn't really mean it. Putin, on the other hand, is going full speed ahead.

I'll Be Watching You
[ Every Breath You Take ]

From the album Orange Is the New Barack (2017).

Week of July 3

Mike Pence has a very different style from Donald Trump. The president calls the media "dishonest." Which might seem fair, since they say the same thing about him. The V.P., on the other hand, gets better coverage from the MSM and is more popular than his boss. For example, this week the failing @nytimes conducted a new survey showing Americans basically agree with Pence on this: "A majority of women, and nearly half of men, say it's unacceptable" for a married person to have dinner or drinks alone with someone of the opposite sex (other than a spouse).

Hello, Is It Mike You're Looking For?
[ Hello ]

Week of June 26

Democrats had high hopes for the recent string of special elections, but they came up empty. So what if they're on a losing streak and have a struggling brand? At least the party is united, and there are no hard feelings from last year's campaign.

Elderly and Ovaries
[ Ebony and Ivory ]

From the album Orange Is the New Barack (2017).

Week of June 19

Amazon wasn't kidding about plans to aggressively expand its service. It has fended off attacks from publishers, from writers, from the FTC — and even by the French. Now it is going on the offensive, moving into the grocery business with its purchase of Whole Foods. The company that's primed to sell you everything from books to music to avocados to your very own quadcopter hasn't been deterred by anything, not even the FAA trying to shoot down its plans for drone delivery.

Everybody Must Get Droned
[ Rainy Day Women ♯12 & 35 ]

From the album How to Succeed in Congress Without Really Lying (2014).

Week of June 12

Oil prices are down and stock prices are up, so Americans will be driving more than ever this summer. Gasoline prices have hit their lowest levels since 2005 for this time of year, and any past worries about contributing to global warming are already forgotten.

What Kind of Fuel Am I?
[ What Kind of Fool Am I? ]

From the album What to Expect When You're Electing (2016).

Week of June 5

Now that Donald Trump has pledged to pull the U.S. out of the Paris accords on combatting climate change, what happens next? Not much. The accords were never binding in the first place, so it doesn't remove any legal restrictions. The coal jobs Trump dreams about aren't coming back, so not too much change for that lobby either. It could be that the same trends as before could simply continue. Just ask Al Gore.

We Warm the World
[ We Are the World ]

Week of May 29

All that globetrotting takes a toll on the president, so what better way to relax after landing in the U.S. than to catch up on his Twitter rants? As soon as he got home Saturday night, he started off by accusing the "#FakeNews media" of fabricating leaks coming out of the White House. He went on to explain that when "sources say" something juicy about his administration, "it's very possible those sources don't exist" but are "made up by fake news writers." Those writers must be working overtime.

Faking News Is Hard to Do
[ Breaking Up Is Hard to Do ]

Week of May 22

Callista Gingrich has been named as the next ambassador to the Vatican, where she'll get to explain President Trump's humble views to Pope Francis. She is a lifelong Catholic. Her husband, not so much. Before his third wife convinced him to convert, former House speaker Newt Gingrich had petitioned the Archdiocese of Atlanta to get his last marriage annulled...on the grounds that his second wife had been previously married. Who knew?! There's no indication that Newt is planning to fade from politics but at least he'll know whom to call if he ever needs another annulment.

Three Little Wives of Newt
[ Three Little Maids From School Are We ]

From the album Take the Money and Run for President (2012).

Week of May 15

Candidates for F.B.I. director have been interviewing at the White House. It's important to make the right choice. When President Nixon passed over Mark Felt and instead picked L. Patrick Gray (in order to ensure the F.B.I.'s "complete loyalty to the administration"), things didn't work out too well. Associate Director Felt became the most celebrated leaker in Washington history, and he never got caught. For 30 years his own relationship with reporters Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein remained secret.

Deep Throat
[ with apologies to Dr. Seuss ]

From the album I'm So Indicted (2006).

Week of May 8

Just in time for National Women's Health Week, Trump picked a "contraception skeptic" to head the government's family planning programs. Along with his new executive order on religious freedom and the ongoing fight to defund Planned Parenthood, it's enough to make many women actually stockpile pills — or even contemplate abstinence. The House Obamacare repeal plan would also bring big changes, though for now it's still just a bill.

I'm Just a Pill
[ I'm Just a Bill ]

From the album Fiscal Shades of Gray (2013).

Week of May 1

According to Donald Trump, North Korean madman Kim Jong Un is "a pretty smart cookie." Why do his missiles keep blowing up? "Perhaps they're just not very good." He said the current situation can't continue, though he didn't exactly give any new details on what his administration is going to do about it. "There's a chance we could end up having a major, major conflict...Absolutely."

How Do You Solve a Problem Like Korea?
[ Maria ]