DIY Invitations

Image courtesy of the brilliant folks at Oh Happy Day

I'm moving forward with my plans to host a pop-up dinner party in September. It feels awesome to be dreaming, scheming, and crafting again. I've been so caught up in other things lately; I haven't had time to nurture my need for creativity. For me, the process of planning things is as enjoyable as the event itself. It's like I get double the pleasure: first, I enjoy the weeks leading up to the event, and then I enjoy the actual event. Hooray for extending the fun!

Since it's a "pop-up" dinner party, I thought it would be fitting to make pop-up invitations. I looked for some inspiration on Pinterest and found the adorable card featured above. 

As for a theme, I've been thinking about: "Farewell to Summer Fiesta." Here's what the invitations might say:

Please join us as we bid farewell to summer with a "pop-up" dinner party. Meet us in the XXXXXX parking lot at 7pm on Saturday, September X. We will lead you to the secret spot for dinner and board games. Please RSVP to sign up to bring something. Hasta luego!

As for a menu, I'm thinking:

• Chips 
• Guacamole
• Creamy Jalapeno Dip
• Vegetarian enchiladas
• Rice
• Salad (with cilantro lime vinaigrette) 
• Horchata to drink
• Dessert!

Here's a list of everything we'll need to bring:

• Two folding tables
• Table cloths
• Folding chairs
• Battery-powered white-lights
• Plates
• Silverware
• Napkins
• Cups
• Bags to put dirty napkins, silverware, plates, and cups
• Taboo and Apples to Apples
• Camera
• Small folding table to store and prepare food
• Papel Picado for decoration
• Tea lights (colored paper bags to put the tea lights in?)

I'm getting excited!

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Today on Feeding the Soil: Making friends as an adult.

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Creamy Tomato Soup Recipe

As part of the Gourmet Grilled Cheese Bar for Henry's birthday party, I went looking for a creamy tomato soup to make. This one from Martha Stewart is surprising simple and tasty. We had it for dinner last night, and it's definitely Henry-approved!

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Today on Feeding the Soil: An important tip for pregnant couples!

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Gourmet Grilled Cheese Bar

For Henry's birthday party on a budget, I'm most excited about the gourmet grilled cheese bar (with tomato soup in the crockpot--thanks, Ellie!).

The trick to keeping costs low is to offer enough options to make it interesting and fun but not too many that it becomes expensive and wasteful.

My search revealed that Martha Stewart--of course--already came up with the grilled cheese bar idea. Alas, I'm sure it will still be unique and interesting to our guests...

For bread, she recommends:

• Rye
• White
• Sourdough

For cheese, she recommends:

• Cheddar
• Gruyère
• Fontina

Here are some of the combinations she suggests:

1. Gruyère, Apple, and Sage on Rye
2. Cheddar, Jalapeno and Cilantro on White
3. Cheddar, Cherry Preserves, and Basil on White

It might make more sense to just set out some ingredients and let people mix and match in ways that make sense to them. Here are some ingredients that sound good to me:

• Avocado
• Strawberries
• Pear
• Arugula
• Tomatoes
• Pickles
• Jalapeno jelly
• Grilled peppers and onions

I need to keep thinking about this...

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Today on Feeding the Soil: Thoughts on when and if to try for another child.

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Food on a Budget

Sheesh. Trying to plan the menu for Henry's budget birthday party brings me back to the difficulty of trying to plan dinner for 80 of our nearest and dearest at our wedding.

Right now, we've got $50 allocated to food. I'm not sure how many people will come. I'm guessing about 20 (including us, plus guests of the guests). Um, that breaks down to $2.50 per person.

Eep!

We'll definitely need to make the food ourselves on that kind of budget, and we'll need it to be easy. Plus we'll be eating outside, so we'll have to think about temperature issues. Some ideas:

• Make-Your-Own-Pizzas (although this might be slow with 20 people, plus we'd have to go in and out of the house)
• Make-Your-Own-Sandwich Bar: This could work (it's what we did for our Welcome Picnic), although I'm not too thrilled about it as a vegetarian. It's just hard to make your own really good vegetarian sandwiches.
  
• Make-Your-Own-Grilled-Cheese: Hmm...this is an interesting idea for a kid's birthday party. We could set up an electric griddle and people could make gourmet grilled cheese sandwiches!
  
• Tacos/Burritos: We could set out a crockpot full of black beans, rice, shredded lettuce and cheese, tomatoes, onions, etc. We could make guacamole and serve queso. This option might be fun, especially because I want to make a pinata for Henry.
  
• Lasagna: These are easy to make ahead, but keeping them warm wouldn't be very fun.
• Chili: We could borrow a couple crock pots and make different kinds of chili. We could set up lots of different toppings.

On this kind of budget, I think we'll have to ask people to bring their own alcohol. We could do a big batch of a signature drink, but it is going to be 11:30 in the morning after all. We have a giant glass dispenser, so we could use it to set up water with orange slices. Maybe a soda bar if we have enough money?

I guess we'll have to decide on the main dish before we start planning the sides. (Oh, and the reason I'm not talking about Henry's preferences in this process is because that kid loves to eat basically anything at this stage in his development.)

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Today on Feeding the Soil: A letter to my son, Henry Jones, on his 11-month birthday.

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Guest Post: Catering as a Wedding Gift

Oh how I wish I lived next door to Anna! What an inspiring person. I love this post about how she catered her friend's wedding. I mean, what's not to love? She has a list of 100 goals for her life. She uses Google Docs to organize her friends. She believes in the power of community. She shows appreciation through crafting. You're awesome, Anna!

By Anna Zeide

Earlier this year, when my best friend from high school and I each drafted a list of 100 goals we have for our lives, one of my items (#93, though there was no particular order) was “cater a friend’s wedding.” I figured, in some daydreamy way, that this was the kind of thing that I may do five or ten years down the road. But then, less than a month later, two of my closest Madison friends were scheming a wedding on fairly short notice and were having no luck finding an affordable and suitable caterer. What could I do but say “I’ll do it!”? So, I jumped right in and starting planning a catered event for 90 guests, without any real background or experience besides a love of food and weddings.

Although my own wedding took place almost two years ago, I’m still reading my two favorite wedding blogs (this one and APW), and continue to be inspired by the messages they share about community, goal-setting, and creating a wedding to fit your dreams rather than those depicted in the media that surrounds us. And so, I owe my ability to make this big event happen partly to Sara and Meg and the example they have set.

Despite these great blog resources, when I began the planning, there were still a lot of questions I had about menu ideas, catering supplies, and the nitty gritty of making this kind of thing happen that I wasn’t finding answers for. So, now that it’s behind me, I’d like to share a few reflections and resources (and check out my blog for the full low-down on my wedding catering experience):

• Location, location, location! Just like when planning a wedding, deciding on a location, along with its benefits and limitations, creates the outline for what you have to work with. Because this wedding was in a park shelter without any cooking facilities at all, and even without convenient running water, I knew that I’d have to bring all the food in fully-prepared, and that room temperature dishes would be best since there’d be no fridge to keep things cool or oven to heat things up.

• Comfort as a priority. In choosing a menu, I came up with a long list of appetizers, salads, sides, and entrees (others were making all the desserts) that I had made before or was comfortable making. Trying something brand new when you’re cooking for 90 people, for a wedding, is probably too much! We also had an all vegetarian menu, and wanted dishes that were fairly accessible to meat-eaters and non-meat-eaters alike, that didn’t rely too heavily on non-local ingredients, and that could also be easily made vegan and gluten-free for the other dietary restrictions among us. The full list of options I proposed to the couple is here. And the final menu we chose is here.

• Staying supplied. Some of our main issues with regards to supplies were keeping the entrees (we settled on these enchiladas) hot, having enough fridge and oven space during the cooking, having enough bowls, platters, and serving spoons for all the dishes at the wedding itself. Our key supplies ended up being inexpensive chafing dishes from this site, warm pancarriers from a local rental company, and lots of bowls/platters/spoons that we borrowed from friends and bought at a local thrift store. The chafing dishes and warm pan carriers were great, and ended up keeping all of our food piping hot. One tip for borrowing supplies: label the bottoms of all the bowls with a small piece of tape and initials; also keep a spreadsheet of all your supplies, so you know who to return things to! Other kinds of dishes and supplies that we found indispensable were foil pans of the full-size and half-size varieties, cutting boards, knives, food processors, large pots, a huge Rubbermaid container for mixing large quantities, and large cookie sheets for extended work surfaces. We also ended up having to store food in three different neighbors’ fridges and cooking in two different ovens—so make friends with your neighbors in advance! Read more about supplies here.

• Communal Cooking! Although I suppose it would be possible for me to do this all on my own (or with only my husband for help), I knew that it would be most fun, and least insanity-inducing, if I got a lot of helping hands in the kitchen. So, I invited all my friends in town to a big cooking extravaganza, and had them all sign up for 2-3 hour shifts on a Google Doc spreadsheet. I knew our kitchen could only handle about 5-6 people at a time, so this helped to make sure the aid was spread out. Sharing my kitchen and fresh food with most of my favorite folks in town was gratifying in a deep-down kind of way. It all gave me an overwhelming sense of hope in the power of community and what can happen when people band together. And I made little personalized Polaroid magnet gifts (inspired by these) for everyone who helped, to make sure they felt appreciated.

• Organization is key. Another piece of advice, that again applies to wedding planning as a whole, is that the more work you can do in advance, to organize the process, the easier the actual tasks will be. In addition to dividing my shopping lists into categories based on grocery store, I also broke each of the recipes down into discrete tasks and determined which day the task could be completed (Thursday, Friday, or Saturday--the day of the wedding). Further, I labeled each of the steps with a letter that corresponded to a particular dish, whose full recipe was on the fridge, for cross-checking purposes. So, when friends came over to help cook, rather than having to ask me what to do, they could just look the list and say, "Ah, yes, now I will 'husk, rinse, and halve 200 tomatillos'." See the full Google Doc version of the task list here.

• Enjoy and eat! The wedding itself was a remarkable success, with so much visible joy and appreciation running through the beautiful park shelter. We got the food there and set up in time, everyone seemed to enjoy eating, and we definitely didn’t run out of food (we had tons of leftovers, in fact!). Being able to do this kind of thing for our friends was so gratifying and so pleasurable. It cemented our friendship in a way that I think few other things could. We are now irrevocably part of each other’s stories!

Lots of people have been asking me if I’d do this again, or if catering is now my back-up plan if this whole grad school thing doesn’t work out. And although I don’t yet quite know the answer to either question, I do know that taking on this kind of project, and having it succeed (!), has made me feel much more confident about my abilities, and has made me smile on a daily basis. So, if you love to cook and love making people (including yourself!) happy, I’d say go for it. I’d be happy to answer questions!

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Anna is a graduate student whose whole life—personal, academic, and political—is wrapped up in food. Read more about all of it at her blog Dining and Opining.
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A huge thank you to Anna for sharing her insights with 2000 Dollar Wedding kindred spirits! If you have an idea for a guest post you would like to write, please send me an e-mail!

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REMINDER: Registration is now open for the next Purposeful Conception Course: Preparing Your Mind, Body, and Life for Pregnancy, which starts on June 5. Register today!

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Guest Post: Last Minute Changes Create Lasting Memories

By Amy J. Hursey

My husband and I faced multiple challenges when we were planning our wedding. We got married on a Wednesday (09-09-09) which created its own challenge, but I think one of the biggest challenges we had to deal with was changing the reception venue less than one month away from the date.

We had planned to have the reception immediately following the ceremony at a small bar/restaurant that is owned by a family member. It was perfect because we could order the food there, a bar was already there and it was less than a mile from the church. We sent out the invitations with all of the information included, directions, etc.

Less than one month from the day of our wedding, we decided that it would be better for many reasons to move the reception. That left us scrambling to find someplace new. The stress of finding a new location, on a week night, less than 30 days away very nearly caused us to cancel the wedding.

I was desperate! Remembering what I had learned from reading websites such as 2000 Dollar Wedding and Offbeat Bride, I decided what was important to me, then I asked some close friends and family members for help, and I thought WAY outside of the box about what to do.

All that was important to me was to have a location, not too far away, that was VERY inexpensive because this cost wasn’t budgeted for, where my dearest friends and family members could gather together, to have a meal, have some fun, and celebrate with us.

Keeping that in mind, I went to talk to Bill, the owner of a local bar. This bar is known for its rowdy customers and for not being terribly clean. There were 3 motorcycles parked in that room, a Christmas tree was standing and there were live chickens in a cage on the patio.

Nervous about it, this is what I learned: Bill was more than happy to let us have the reception in his large back room and patio area. Wednesday nights were slow for him anyway. He was not offended when I asked if I could come in the day before and clean the room, the patio and the restrooms. He said I could use anything I wanted and do anything I wanted and bring in what ever food items I needed to. He provided us with tables chairs, extension cords, let us run a tab at the bar, didn’t bat an eye when we put staples in his ceiling, offered to help us with everything, even offered to close the bar so no one else would come in. He moved the motorcycles and the chickens disappeared (I didn’t ask where they were). And the best part, he did not charge us one penny to use the place. When we asked about a DJ, he offered us the house DJ for the bargain basement price of $100 for 4 hours of play time. He even cut us a deal on the bar tab at the end of the night- $100 for ALL of our drinks.

The change of plans was done though phone calls and e-mails, we had delicious food catered in from a grocery store 1 mile away, friends and family members spent the day before cleaning and decorating with me and it all worked out. You’d be amazed at what some white Christmas lights, some balloons and yards and yards of tulle can do to transform a room!

When our guests heard where we were having our reception they sincerely thought I had lost my mind. My husband summed it up perfectly when he told me “Baby, if someone doesn’t want to celebrate with us because of where it's at, or the day of the week, they aren’t the kind of people we want there anyway.” He was right. Even if I had an unlimited budget I wouldn’t want it any other way.

So yeah, we had our reception in a bar. It was cheap and people were relaxed and enjoyed themselves. Yes, there were some drunk patrons there that we didn’t know. They wished us well and put money towards our bar tab. Yes, there was a dog with newborn puppies behind the bar. It was cute and we like dogs. The weather was perfect and people enjoyed the patio. At the end of the night, we were married to each other, we celebrated with people we love and we weren’t broke from having to pay for all of the unplanned things. It may not have been perfect, but it was perfect for us.

If I had gotten all caught up in the WIC and what a wedding reception was “supposed” to be it would not have been that way. I might not have gotten to see my mom and dad kissing and posing for pictures. Mom died just a few months later and that picture is precious. We might not have met some new friends and we might have been way more stressed out and with a whole lot less money in my bank account because of it.

When you truly shake off all the glitter from what’s going on and think about what does matter, and you stop stressing about the table linens and perfectly tied bows on the favors, all of the little things fall aside, and make room for what will become your favorite memories.

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Guest Post: A Tale of Two Receptions

by Rachel Lowe

This is a short and sweet post, chronicling our adventure of a bi-coastal wedding reception. If we had to do it all over again, we would do exactly the same thing! I would encourage any couple who has roots in two vastly different areas (like, Virginia and Oregon for example) to consider the possibility of celebrating your marriage in both areas. Here are the top 3 reasons for at least giving it a second thought.

1) You get to celebrate with everyone - even those who can't travel. Part of our reasoning for doing the bi-coastal celebration in the first place was the sheer number of people we didn't want to burden with the cost of a plane ticket. There were college and high school friends, distant relatives, and old colleagues who truly wanted to be a part of this special time, but couldn't afford the time off work and/or the travel costs. So this was a way of allowing them to spend some time with us! Plus, the cost of 2 plane tickets is MUCH more affordable than say...60?

2) You get to involve more people in the process. My mother and my aunt wanted to be part of the wedding in a big way, but due to the distance (just over 3000 miles I believe), that would not have been very likely if we had kept the reception as a Virginia-only affair. It felt good to let them be part of the planning adventure as well. They both had their hand in the VA festivities as well, but more with the last minute details, since they did not know the area or the vendors.

3) You get to celebrate TWICE! We chose to have two completely different reception types, and it was so fun. Our Virginia ceremony/reception was small and intimate - an afternoon, adults-only affair for very close friends and family. Our Oregon Reception was a PARTY - kids, dancing, singing, and large amounts of wine and beer. Plus - added bonus - I got to wear the dress twice. The first Reception ended by 6:30pm, so we actually got to have a wedding night. The second reception ended at 2:30am, following too many free shots at random downtown bars.

One suggestion that made things easier on our end: hold the reception that is not attached to a ceremony close to a major holiday. This killed two birds with one stone. In addition to making sure many of my friends were in town visiting their families, we also go to fly out west and spend Thanksgiving with my family this year! Finding a venue the Saturday after Thanksgiving was also fairly easy, as far fewer people hold weddings around Thanksgiving (although I've heard it is a popular time for other large events like high school reunions).

I realize this doesn't apply to everyone, but I hope I've offered some food for thought to those in situations similar to ours. Wherever, whenever, and however you hold your receptions, just remember to CELEBRATE!

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Rachel Lowe is a very part-time blogger and photographer living outside Washington, DC. Along with her brand-spanking-new husband, Greg, she loves to ride motorcycles, look at random things through her telescope, and go hiking in her new Vibram Five-Fingers. Read more about their journey toward a balanced life at Lowe on Balance.

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If you would like to write a guest post to share your perspective with fellow kindred spirits, please e-mail me your topic idea!

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Collecting & Developing Ideas: Shooting Range Wedding

I received an e-mail from a kindred spirit who is planning a wedding in San Diego. She and her partner are trying to work within a $2,500 budget. Here's what she says about the search for a venue:

We had settled on one place that required little decorating but was $1200 PLUS they required the beverages be professionally catered.

Then the idea came from my fiancee's parents (retired San Diego Police Department) to have the reception at the hall at the shooting range. Yes, the shooting range. The place is at the right price (free), plus we would have no time restrictions, and we can bring our own alcohol. Now I want to make the best of it and come up with creative ideas for decorating the place and incorporate a little bit of the shooting range theme in to it.

And she would like our help coming up with ideas! I'm psyched to help out; this wedding sounds like it will be so meaningful, memorable, and downright fun!

I know from personal experience that trying to find a wedding venue in a popular city can be a NIGHTMARE. There are typically Wedding Industrial Complex predators everywhere, waiting to get signed contracts from their most recent prey. I don't mean to sound overly dramatic because clearly not every wedding venue is evil, but so often the word "wedding" means that everything has to be more expensive. Once a venue starts requiring that you use their alcohol or their catering services, the costs can skyrocket.

And the truth is, there are very few MUSTS associated with planning a wedding. Aside from marrying someone you want to be with for the rest of your life, there really are no rules. You don't have to wear white if you don't want to (or even a dress, for that matter). You don't have to dance. You don't have to wear a garter. You don't have to have flowers (unless, of course, you want to!).

Although you may get a strange look (or two or three) when you try to explain any unconventional choices that you and your partner make for your wedding, going your own way can be absolutely worth it. You can craft an experience that feels more authentic and more fun.

So, without further ado, let me try to brainstorm some ideas for the shooting range theme:

• First, I think the invitations and wedsite (if you have those things) are an excellent way to introduce the theme early. I think a clever phrase and a cute picture could work together perfectly. Something like, "We're aiming for a lifetime of love and happiness. Please join us as we celebrate our marriage." Or "We're gunning to get married. Please join in the fun!" You could weave shooting references throughout the invitation and wedsite with phrases like, "You only get one shot; we hope you're able to join us for this special day!" I also think it would be fun to play with the theme in the attire section of your wedsite by saying something like, "Bullet-proof vests not required."
  
• In terms of decoration, targets come to mind. You could make target place mats for centerpieces by gluing together concentric circles on a circular base of cardstock. Perhaps you could make paper bunting of circular targets and string it all around the room.

Those are my ideas for now, but hopefully more people will take a shot (cheesy pun, intended) at coming up with additional ideas in the comments!

Please share your ideas!

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McWeddings

I can't believe I'm actually writing a post about McDonald's. I am vehemently anti-McDonald's (for all of the reasons delineated in Supersize Me), but I actually think it's cool that the McDonald's in Hong Kong are now offering weddings.

Well, let me take that back. It's actually kind of sad that McDonald's has jumped on the Wedding Industrial Complex bandwagon because it means they will start charging more than they otherwise would, but reading the article reminded me that one of the most effective ways to cut costs during wedding planning is to steer clear of the well-worn wedding path when selecting a venue.

For example, Matt and I rented out an entire B&B that is more commonly used for scrapbooking retreats. We scored the whole thing for $750 bucks a night (which we reclaimed by collecting $25-35/night from our friends who stayed on site). We were able to use their kitchen, white lights, tables, chairs, coolers, grills, board games, hot tub, fire pit, tablecloths, utensils, serving bowls--the list goes on and on.

I've also seen people rent out restaurants and bowling alleys--the possibilities are endless!

The one caveat is that you have to think through what you'll be doing at the venue and whether it's equipped to meet your needs. For example, if you score a cheap venue but then need to rent absolutely everything to fill it up, you can end up spending more in the end.

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Mexican Fiesta

When Matt and I were planning our wedding, my best friend, Andy, said something along the lines of: "Why can't people plan weddings more like they plan birthday parties?"

Matt and I tried to take that advice to heart by striving to plan a meaningful and memorable celebration that was also fun. As a result, we found ourselves holding lots of wedding "traditions" under the microscope and asking ourselves, "Do we want to keep, modify, or toss out this tradition?" It was both liberating and scary-as-anything to realize that the choice really was ours.

Now that our wedding is under our belt, we are focusing on birthday parties. Matt's is coming up in November, and he started with a single idea: he wanted to get a pinata made of himself (kooky, I know). I suggested we throw some sort of Mexican fiesta, and now the idea has evolved into a bouncy house and a taco truck. I'm ecstatic! Of course we'll have to price everything out and see what we can make work. We'll probably end up DIYing the pinata and the taco truck (somehow). I'll keep you updated!

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DIY: Coloring Books

Here's a step-by-step tutorial about how to turn your photos into coloring books. These would be fun to put together for the kiddos at your wedding. The technique would also be fun to use for Save-the-Dates, invitations, thank-you cards, etc.

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Crayons at a Wedding

I stole this picture from one of my friend's wall posts on Facebook.

Hooray for crayons at a wedding! (It turns out my friend had to steal them off the kids' table, but I love this idea.)

How fun would it be to cover the tables in butcher paper (or recycled craft paper), set up cups of crayons and let everyone express themselves all over the tables? Plus, later you could cut out memorable pieces and frame them as keepsakes.

I'm going to add this idea to my List of Ways to Have Fun at a Wedding.

Good times!

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Q & A: Engaging Guests in Your Wedding

Reader Question: In addition to dancing, how do you encourage guests to partake in the other activities you have set up for them, like the board games, etc.?

This question came out of the comments section from last week's post about how to encourage guests to dance at your wedding reception.

Because we rented out an entire B&B for our wedding reception, we were able to take over the whole place. People could soak in the hot-tub, cook S'mores around the campfire, play board games, throw around footballs or Frisbees, or dance on the patio. We found that the best way to encourage guests to partake in the activities was to simply make them aware of what their options were. We did this in a couple ways:

1. We included specific details about the itinerary and all the options on our wedsite. On the invitation, we directed people to our wedsite. Even though it was a free blog, we kept the information static so people wouldn't have to search too hard to find something.
2. Since we knew not everyone would look at our wedsite, we also sent an e-mail update a couple times leading up to the wedding. Within those e-mails, we included highlights of agenda items.
3. We posted a piece of chart paper with the agenda for the weekend in a prominent place. People started to see it as soon as they arrived for the Welcome Picnic (see photo above).
4. We included more information the wedding ceremony programs and asked our officiant to make announcements as well.
   

To take it one step further, you could ask close friends or family members to take the lead on certain activities (be sure to let them pick what they actually want to do!). That way, guests will see other people doing the activities, and they will be less intimated.

Those are my two cents. I'd love to hear other ideas!

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How to Get People to Dance at Your Wedding

A couple comments on last week's iPod playlist post inspired me to write about how to get people to dance at your wedding.

Yes!

Our strategy was simple: we picked [what we considered to be] a very high energy first song ("Blister in the Sun") and we asked everyone in our wedding party (there were 12 of us all together) to please, please, please dance your hearts out to get the party started.

To be even more strategic, we should have asked a few trusted friends and family members to commit to dancing right away, too. We didn't do this and everything still worked out well, but if I were doing it again, I might take out this little bit of extra insurance.

I've found that friends are more than happy to help in whatever way they can. So much of the mainstream culture pressures us to turn our weddings into shows. They tell us that it's best for our guests to sit back, relax, and enjoy the performance. In my experience, I found that the guests who actively participated (in big ways like cooking the fajitas or small ways like being asked to clap during the ceremony) enjoyed the experience more because they helped bring the experience to fruition.

We also had a help-yourself keg at our wedding, which really fueled the dance party (although I think alcohol-free festivities can be just as raucous). In addition to the dance party, we also had board games going on, hot-tub soaking, and story-telling around the campfire. Some family members congregated in the quieter areas to read the book my best friend made for us.

The other question that came up within the comment section of that post was about how to get people to clap during the ceremony. I really, really wanted people to clap after each speaker in our wedding--not because it's a show but rather to show appreciation for the speakers, so I stealthily asked four friends in the audience and the wedding party to take the clapping/cheering lead.

It worked well! Many people are itching to clap at a ceremony; they just need a catalyst to start the clapping.

Please share any other ideas you all have!

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Ideas for Having Fun at a Wedding

One of the best weddings I've ever been to was at a Children's Museum. It was simply so much fun to play with the bubble machines, climb on the vertical mazes (see photo above), and talk into the echo-tubes.

Matt and I also wanted to saturate our wedding with fun, beyond the standards: drinking, eating, and dancing (although we definitely wanted those, too!). Over the course of two days (both our reception and the Welcome Picnic on Friday), we incorporated the following fun activities:

1. Cooking S'mores around a campfire
2. Soaking in a hot-tub
3. Playing volleyball
4. Offering a swing dance lesson
5. Playing board games (e.g., Jenga, Scrabble, Uno)
6. Playing horseshoes

I keep adding to a list for other couples who want to introduce an element of fun into their weddings, too:

7. Taking pictures in a photobooth
8. Playing lawn games (e.g., Bocce Ball, Croquet, Badminton, Horseshoes, etc.)
9. Jumping on pogo sticks
10. Having a hula-hooping contest
11. Doing a scavenger hunt
12. Playing BINGO
13. Hosting a talent show
14. Hiring a fortune teller, palm reader, etc.
15. Playing middle school games (e.g., tetherball, kickball, dodgeball, hopscotch, four-square, etc.)
16. Playing ping-pong or pool
17. Competing for prizes (e.g., potato sack race, bean-bag toss, etc.)
18. Making big bubbles
19. Playing card games (e.g., poker, rummy, hearts, uno)
20. Playing Frisbee golf
21. Playing charades or pictionary
22. Renting an air-hocking table
23. Offering chair massages
24. Busting open a pinata
25. Eating fondue
26. Making crafts at a craft table
27. Renting a juke-box
28. Playing casino games
29. Sidewalk chalk
30. Graffiti wall
31. Hosting a parade
32. Contradancing
33. Renting a segway

Please add any additional ideas in the comments!

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iPod Wedding Playlist: Part Deux

Dear all y'all fantastic 2000 Dollar Wedding readers,
Matt B. (Sara's partner) here again and I've got a couple things to get off my chest before I begin:

1. Thank you for the wonderful comments on my previous post. Sara forwarded all of them my way. I should have responded and will make an effort to respond this time!
2. If you remember, and were harmed in any way, by my not writing three playlists in the three weeks that I originally set-out to, I apologize. My Sara didn't schedule me into her busy post schedule until now.

So, without further adieu, here is the wedding iPod playlist from our reception dinner. There are some of my favorites of all time in there, but it can most-definitely be improved on. So, take it, improve upon it, and share it out!

P.S. - There are a number of YouTube links below, if you're interested in taking the audio out of them... not that you would be... I've heard there are websites that can do it for you like http://www.listentoyoutube.com/ or http://www.vidtomp3.com/


Note to self: As I read back over what was played, I regret the serious lack of theme beyond "it's fairly up-tempo and I like it". In fact, the reception list reads more like a break-up mix, e.g. "So Sorry", "Forks and Knives", "What Makes you Think You're the One". I need to fix this in time for my next wedding.

Iron and Wine - Faded from Winter
Bob Dylan - I Shall Be Released
Be Good Tanyas - The Littlest Birds
Feist - The Park
Frank Sinatra - Summer Wind
Galia Arad - Gypsy Boy (my dear friend; super-talented; adorable)
Be Good Tanyas - Dogsong
Amos Lee - Seen it All Before (big shout-out to my dearest of friends Austin Wright)
Cat Stevens - The Wind
Eliete Negreiros - Meu Mundo e Hoje
Dave Matthews - #41
Death Cab for Cutie - A Movie Script Ending (From Daytrotter.com (FREE amazing MP3s))
Les Nubians - Immortel Cheikh Anta Diop
Chad and Jeremy - A Summer Song
Jens Lekman - You Can Call me Al
David Gray - Babylon II
Fleet Foxes - White Winter Hymnal
Feist - So Sorry
Jack Johnson - Gone
Beirut - Forks and Knives
Carla Bruni - L'Excessive
Smashing Pumpkins - Lilly
Ben Gibbard - Carolina
Handsome Boy Modeling School - Breakdown
Death Cab for Cutie - Soul Meets Body
Fleetwood Mac - What Makes you Think You're the One
Pickin' On Series - World At Large (Bluegrass Tribute to Modest Mouse)
Alison Krauss - I'll Fly Away
Guillemots - Trains to Brazil
Bob Marley and the Wailers - Corner Stone (From the album "Jungle Dub")
Weezer - Say it Ain't So
Sarah Harmer - Uniform Grey
Same Cooke - Nobody Knows the Trouble I've Seen
The Feelies - Let's Go
Chromeo - Momma's Boy
Eagle Eye Cherry - Save Tonight

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Q & A: Cheap Wedding Reception Catering Ideas

Reader Question: Okay, so maybe you've already answered this but I haven't been reading your blog for long or been planning my wedding for long either, but I've begun to start planning our wedding (even if it is far away) and the thing that I'm worried about getting into the budget is the food. What is the best way to do food for cheap and still have it taste good? Thank you so much for your help!

Ah, yes. Catering a big party for your nearest and dearest. I remember the stress.

Here's what I don't understand. How is it that Matt and I can go to a restaurant and get two delicious meals for under $30 total and yet $15/person is practically unheard of in the catering world? Yes, I realize that catering usually involves set-up and clean-up and service, but it's food in bulk! It's a few items mass produced! Ugh.

Here are a few ideas for saving money:

1. Plan to avoid major meal times: This suggestion is the standard recommendation for brides on a budget. There are a couple variations on this theme, including having a brunch wedding or doing something like champagne and cake instead of a full-blown meal.
2. Host a potluck and let your community cater the the meal: I've talked ad nauseum about this option, so I won't say much more. I just couldn't bear to leave it off the list, since it really is a great way to save money (and foster community and connection).
3. Self-cater: Matt and I went this route because we wanted to save money and we wanted to involve our community in the creation of our wedding. Although this route worked nearly perfectly for us, it's not something to be taken lightly. It takes a lot of planning and can create a ton of stress.
4. Partially self-cater: If a handful of your nearest and dearest like to cook, why not tap into their culinary skills for all the sides and hire a catering company to provide the main dishes?
5. Go for novelty: Renting a portable wood burning oven + pizza crew or hiring an entire taco truck might be cheaper options (and will certainly go a long way towards making the day memorable).
6. Stray far, far away from the beaten path: It's hard to find a good deal on the well-worn wedding path (thanks, Wedding Industrial Complex). However, there are deals waiting to be scored in the dives and family-run businesses of our towns. Think of your favorite restaurant (that doesn't have a pre-printed catering menu) and talk to them about the possibilities. Or what about finding an up-and-coming caterer who is looking to build his/her portfolio? Or what about friends of friends of friend? You can always use craigslist or younger siblings' friends to hire some additional serving/cleaning/setting up help.

Just remember, expensive does not necessarily equal good. I have been to plenty of expensive weddings at expensive venues that essentially served conference food. Meh.

The moral of the story is: be creative. So often, we get stuck inside the pre-planned wedding formula. We're pressured into conforming to everyone else's vision of what a wedding is. The truth is, the Once-in-a-Lifetime perfect white wedding is really just a societal construct that you can choose to follow, modify, or throw out entirely. Your wedding is your chance for you and your partner to share your lives with your nearest and dearest. If you want to have a Saturday afternoon ceremony, evening reception, white dress, garter, bouquet toss, cake cutting, first dance [insert countless other "essential" details], that's your choice. If you don't want any of it (or want some of it), the choice is also yours.

I'm eager to hear your ideas about cheap wedding catering options that still taste scrumptious! Please share!

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Q & A: Wedding Potluck Logistics

Potluck wedding via Recipes and Ruminations

Reader Question: Hello! I thought I might send over a question or two to get some advice from you and the rest of your readers. My fiance and I are having a potluck dinner after our wedding. The meat will be provided by us--beef from his uncle's small farm, and maybe venison (we're looking into the legality of that one, considering we don't want said uncle to get his hunting license revoked or jail time). The sides will be on our registry in categories like "veggie main dish," "pies," "rolls/cornbread," "fruit plate," etc. for people to register for as their gift to us. We're asking them to bring a card with their name, the name of the dish, and any common allergens or designations (peanuts, gluten-free, soy, vegan, etc.), as well as a recipe card for us to include in a wedding cookbook. As for the organization of it all, we're asking his three incredibly capable sisters to handle it (the ones who were asking, "Why aren't we more involved in the wedding?? What can we do??"), and we're getting married at a summer camp, so the camp's kitchen staff will set up the food, replenish it, remove empty dishes, etc. So, my questions are these: What have we overlooked? What potential snags should we watch out for? How did it go for couples who have done this before? Any tips would be appreciated. Thanks!

Yeeeesssss! A potluck wedding! Don't get me wrong; I appreciate all kinds of catering options (even this pig roast wedding sounded awesome to my vegetarian ears), but I have a special place in heart for potluck weddings (see my previous post: A Case for Potluck Weddings here).

First, I love potlucks. I love the variety of foods to choose from and the fact that people contribute a little piece of themselves to the gathering through their offering.

Second, I think wedding potlucks are the best potlucks ever. (I say that more from an inferential point of view, since I've never actually been to a potluck wedding.) I can only imagine how wonderful the food will be when it is cooked by your nearest and dearest in order to celebrate your commitment, community, and love. Wow!

Third, potlucks are a huge money-saver. Catering costs can be astronomical. I think potlucks are a magnificent way to seriously scale back a wedding budget AND provide guests with a delicious meal.

Fourth, potlucks--in my mind--are the quintessential expression of community. They are a metaphor for what it looks like when each person contributes their small part to the greater good. The outcome is better than the sum of its parts.

Fifth, a potluck wedding will be truly memorable. Like I've said, I've never been to a potluck wedding, and they aren't featured very much in the wedding blogosphere. I imagine your guests will truly enjoy the unique experience (and appreciate the opportunity to put their heart and intention into a present, instead of just their cash).

Okay, enough gushing. Can you tell I'm really excited for you and your partner?

It seems like you've got everything thoroughly planned! I love the idea of the info cards (and the wedding recipe cookbook--what an item to cherish forever!).

One thing that comes to mind is serving utensils. Whenever I host potlucks, there are always a handful of people who don't bring serving utensils, so just be sure to have some extras on hand.

Also, extension cords. People might show up with crockpots full of goodness and need a place to plug in.

My last thought is about sharing all the recipes with all your guests. Perhaps you could start a free blog (or use a wedding wedsite?) to scan in the recipes and upload them as photos. I've done this for several recipes, and I think it's pretty easy to read them if folks click on the photos.

Ooh! You could even use TasteBook to turn it into a bound cookbook that you give as gifts to people whom you really want to thank.

(Matt's sitting next to me and he recommended that you make a one-page menu to share with guests beforehand to highlight all the yumminess they will get to experience.)

Hmm, I think that's all we've got.

2000dollarwedding kindred spirits, please help us out! Anything else she should anticipate/consider/plan/do?

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Salt Shaker Centerpieces

Idea courtesy of Apartment Therapy

Ooh. I adore these simple centerpieces made from salt-shakers. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways:

1. Potentially very inexpensive if purchased from thrift stores.
2. Nice and low to the table so they don't prevent guests from conversing across the table.
3. Require only a few snippets of flowers (or even free foliage snipped from accommodating plants).
   

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Ways to Have Fun at a Wedding: Contradancing

A couple weekends ago, Matt was out of town and I was feeling a little lonely and sad (and then mad at myself for losing my independence and not relishing my freedom properly). I was also battling a major sinus situation that was commandeering my head. I decided to cheer myself up by going to Burger King for a veggie burger and fries (which is embarrassing to admit because, in principle, fast food makes me very angry, but it's important to be open and honest about one's foibles!).

On my way home, I saw a sign that said, "Contradance Tonight!" with a sign pointing toward an Episcopal church in my neighborhood.

I haven't seen or thought about contradancing since 2005 when I went on a self-subsidized sabbatical that included a stop over at the John C. Campbell folk art school in North Carolina. Contradancing was a huge deal there, and in an effort to immerse myself in the full experience of folk art school, I took up contradancing. It's a partnered folk dance that involves lots of twirly skirts and live music.

I mustered the courage to follow the notebook-paper signs inside the building and up the stairs.

I was immediately welcomed. I somehow let Roy--a regular--talk me into doing a dance, even though I was quite intimidated by my lack of recent experience (I tend to be a perfectionist, so spontaneous partner/group dancing without months of lessons is not really my thing). But boy was it fun! Sure there was the requisite guy who takes dancing way too seriously and gets impatient with my inexperience, but everyone else was super-friendly and fun. As you pass from person to person, you make eye-contact and smile. They even provided name tags! What a great way to build community.

I realized that contradancing would be a super fun thing to do at a wedding. I added it to the list of Ways to Have Fun at a Wedding. You'd have to hire a caller, but contradancing is a really easy thing to learn. A brief 30-minute lesson would introduce everyone to the basic moves. After that, each dance is explained before it starts with a little practice time.

Good times!

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