Conan O'Brienಪರಿಶೀಲಿಸಿದ ಖಾತೆ

"Stuck a feather in his cap and called it macaroni" was for many years the textbook definition of insanity.

I’m not sure I agree with Roy Moore’s position that “life begins at masturbation.”

Just got picked up in a self-driving Lyft. And the driver still talked my ear off.

Tonight I hung out with Chris Hemsworth, Ryan Reynolds and Channing Tatum at this cool bar called Never Gonna Happen’s.

Trump just made even more people angry -- he plans to recognize Lannisport as the capital of Westeros.

I prefer that other Chinese curse, “May you live in boring times, near a Dunkin’ Donuts.”

Please don’t @ me, I’m on a news cleanse.

I just spent 3 hours trying to solve this Rubik's Cube before my son told me it's an apple. I may need a nap.

Flynn pleads guilty and flips. Finally, the 282nd sure thing to bring down the Trump Administration.

A great thing about the new tax plan - if you own a race horse, you can write off its genitals as a small business.

The GOP tax plan can only be read while wearing a monocle and shouting “Jeeves! Wipe me!”

Five hundred years ago, it would take months for word of a sitcom’s cancellation to reach Europe.

May you live in interesting times, like when your vice-president starts picking his vice-president.

I returned a book to the library today and learned they really prefer it to be a book that was previously checked out of a library.

The trailer for Marvel’s new Avengers movie came out today, and it’s starring every woman in America.

Lifehack: Get a tattoo of your face on the top of your head so there's never a need to look up from your phone.

A Mormon came to my door, and after a long, emotional, and persuasive pitch, I got him to start wearing longer sleeves.

Latest entry in my Gratitude Journal: "The Altoids people didn't go into the suppository business."