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Close Your Porn Tabs Before Posting Screenshots to Your Congressional Campaign Page

Mike Webb is running for U.S. Congress in Virginia’s 8th district, and he would really appreciate your vote. He would also appreciate, judging from a screenshot uploaded to his Facebook page earlier today, a little alone time with the pages ā€œIVONE SEXY AMATEURā€ and ā€œLAYLA RIVERA TIGHT BOOTY.ā€*

Jane Little, the World's Longest-Serving Orchestra Musician, Dies Slapping the Bass on Stage

The record-breaking career of 87-year-old Jane Little, the world’s longest-serving orchestra musician, came to an end on Sunday when the 5'3 bassist collapsed onstage during the Atlanta Symphony’s performance of ā€œBroadway’s Golden Age.ā€ The song she was playing, fittingly enough, was ā€œThere’s No Business Like Show…

27 Things I Learned At My First Electric Daisy Carnival

Late last week, Julianne Escobedo Shepherd asked the Jezebel staff if anyone else wanted to go to the Electric Daisy Carnival in New York. Although I didn’t know what the Electric Daisy Carnival was (and basically still don’t), I said ā€œYes, I will,ā€ because I’m trying to live más (when I said this to Kate Dries, she…

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E!'s Newest Show Looks Like a Thinly Veiled Take on Scientology's Most Famous Member

In the trailer for E!’s upcoming scripted series The Arrangement, we follow a young actress as she mulls over a $10 million offer to wed one of the world’s biggest movie stars, who happens to be the most prominent member of a cult-like ā€œself-help organization.ā€ And though that might sound like the story of a certain…

Elevate Your Evacuation: Squatty Potties Have a Rare Discount on Amazon Today

Did you know you’ve been pooping all wrong? It’s true! Luckily, the obscenely popular Squatty Potty is designed to lift your legs into an ideal bowel movement position, and you can get a 7" or 9" model for just $19 on Amazon today. These things never go on sale, so if you’ve had your eye on one, it’s officially time…