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  1. 2 hours ago

    twitter is 1/3 news, 1/3 memes, and 1/3 bios that say “lover of the oxford comma”

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  2. 16 hours ago

    well, i’m about to start training for a 10k run that’s in *checks notes* 5 days

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  3. 22 hours ago

    what people expect when i interview them vs. reality

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  4. Apr 9
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  5. Apr 9

    “How did we let this happen again, and when will it end?”

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  6. Apr 8

    update: my tastes are very singular

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  7. Apr 7

    channeling big baguette energy in 2019

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  8. Apr 7

    *taps mic* “i finished a book...in two weeks” *the crowd stands and applauds rapturously*

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  9. Apr 7

    “In ‘99,” McDonald explained, “there was a thought at the time — and it wasn’t a wrong thought — that if we tear the school down, the killers will have won.” “We didn’t ever envision what it would become 20 years later.”

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  10. Apr 6

    me: please don’t say it please don’t say it please do— spin instructor: you’re crushing it! now give your neighbour a fist bump!

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  11. Apr 6
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  12. Apr 6

    apple bottom jeans (jeans) boots with the fur (with the fur) the whole club was lookin’ at her -rupi kaur

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  13. Apr 5
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  14. Retweeted
    Apr 5

    Me: *pitches decent idea* Editor: Love this idea! When can you have a draft in by? Me, realizing I actually have to write now:

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  15. Apr 5
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  16. Apr 4

    when i have thoughts about cherry blossom stories

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  17. Apr 3

    the opening joke: “have you ever thought about how bus drivers take the bus to work?”

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  18. Apr 3

    went to an amateur comedy show tonight and like...my tweets could do better??

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  19. Retweeted

    bizarre story. interviewed Toronto weed store's publicist posing as the "first customer." She describes it as the "best experience" in "most beautiful store I’ve ever seen" but it's never mentioned that she does their pr:

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  20. Apr 2

    Got to work on this series last year with and . There are millions of refugees stuck in Turkey right now awaiting resettlement. Take the time to read some of their stories:

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