<![CDATA[Scary Mommy]]>https://www.scarymommy.comScary MommySat, 21 Dec 2024 06:26:55 GMT<![CDATA[The 65 Coolest Things For Your Home On Amazon You Never Knew Existed]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/shopping/the-coolest-things-for-your-home-on-amazon-you-never-knew-existedhttps://www.scarymommy.com/shopping/the-coolest-things-for-your-home-on-amazon-you-never-knew-existedFri, 20 Dec 2024 23:30:24 GMT

If you want to bring some fun decor and helpful home improvement tools into your life, this list of cool Amazon products is a one-stop shop. It’s the stuff you probably didn’t know existed but will be thrilled to find out actually does. If you’re ready to make your space cuter and more functional, this list is jam-packed with awesome finds.

A Cozy Bed Wedge That Prevents Pillows From Sinking Into The Gap

Prevent your pillow from sinking into the gap between your mattress and your bed’s headboard by using this genius bed wedge gap filler. Made of high-density foam, the wedge is comfortable to lay on while serving a great purpose — it can even stop stuffed animals from falling into the abyss. It comes with a side pocket that holds a phone or any small items.

A Foldable Laptop Desk That Also Works As A Snack & Crafting Tray

Use this versatile foldable laptop desk to elevate your computer as you work — whether you want to stand while working or have better posture while sitting. The small desk, which conveniently includes a drawer and cup holder, also works great as a breakfast-in-bed or snacks-in-bed tray as well as a tray for crafting, doing homework, or reading.

A Toilet Paper Holder That Fits 4 Rolls At Arm’s Reach

With this convenient toilet paper holder, you’ll always have a fresh roll at arm’s reach so you don’t have to holler to an unwilling family member to grab you one. The holder can fit up to four rolls, including mega rolls up to 6.5 inches in diameter. You can use adhesive or hooks to hang it over the toilet tank, on a smooth wall, or on a cabinet door.

Grabber Tongs That Can Be Used For Flipping Practically Any Food

While these grabber tongs are especially helpful in delicately removing waffles from a waffle maker, they work just as well for hot dogs, pancakes, and all types of food that need to be flipped or grabbed from a hot area. The hooked ends of the stainless steel tongs fit perfectly into the waffle divots to prevent tearing.

A High-Quality Cast Iron Grill Pan That Offers Even Heat Distribution

This high-quality cast iron grill pan is the perfect size to cook plenty of meat. At just under five pounds, the grill pan isn’t too heavy but maintains durability. Raised ridges provide a grilled effect. The pan can withstand heat up to 500 degrees and is safe for electric, gas, induction, or any stovetop. It offers even heat distribution and is overall an easy pan to use.

A Handy Under-Cabinet Shelf Basket That Can Hold Up To 30 Pounds

This handy under-cabinet shelf basket is an innovative way to help you organize your things — whether it’s kitchen tools, pantry items, bathroom accessories, books, or something completely different. The durable, rustproof metal basket can hold up to 30 pounds. No tools are necessary for hanging.

Creepy Crawly Roach Bag Clips That Are So Hilarious

No one needs this set of four roach bag clips, but everyone should absolutely get them. The creepy crawlies are hilarious and totally worthwhile, whether you want to use them to play a revolving joke on your family or just to bring a smile to your face. They aren’t just amusing though, they’re also practical and will clip your chips like the best of them.

A Microwave Pasta Cooker So You Don’t Even Have To Boil Water

If your kids demand noodles and butter every night for dinner, you’ll be very pleased to know this microwave pasta cooker exists. The pasta will be done cooking in the time it would normally take a pot of water to boil. Backed by over 10,000 glowing five-star reviews, it’s the type of kitchen tool that works better than expected, and one you’ll question how you lived without.

Fun Ceramic Mugs That Look Like Crumpled Plastic Cups

You will feel a slight twinge of joy whenever you use one of these fun and unique crumpled ceramic cups. Made of durable ceramic, the 7-ounce cups look like actual crumpled plastic cups and are perfect for coffee, cocktails, mocktails for kids, and more. The two-pack of cups can be used in the freezer, oven, microwave, and dishwasher.

A Space-Saving Pants Hanger That Can Hold 6 Pairs At Once

Pants can be tricky to hang, but this space-saving pants hanger gets the job done in a compact and effective way. The hanger consists of six sturdy metal rods that allow you to hang six pairs of pants. It can be hung horizontally in a closet or vertically to take up even less space. It’s also a good option for other garments like scarves, tank tops, and more.

Velvet Chair Seat Covers That Are Washable & Are Easy To Add

Give your chairs a big-time upgrade with the purchase of this set of four velvet seat covers. The seat covers are stretchy and feature ties, which makes them easy to fit and nonslip. They’re available in 13 pretty colors and can be removed and thrown in the washing machine to look new again. You can also grab them in sets of two or six, depending on how many dining chairs you have.

A Foam Lap Desk & Arm Rest With A Washable Cover

If you enjoy working or watching shows from bed, this foam lap desk will elevate your experience — literally and figuratively. The lap desk is spacious enough to give you plenty of room to rest your arms, and two cut-outs on the bottom allow it to be positioned over each of your legs. It features a soft and washable cover that can easily be removed.

A Metal Bread Box That Comes With A Wooden Slicing Board

For long-lasting freshness of your yummy homemade bread, place it in this farmhouse-style metal bread box. The sleek bread box is a stylish place to keep your bread. It’s large enough to hold multiple loaves, clearing up the clutter on your countertop. The wooden lid of the bread box, crafted from bamboo, doubles as a convenient slicing board.

Handy Toilet Seat Lifters That Encourage Lifting & Lowering

Encourage certain members of your family to lift and lower the toilet seat with the use of a toilet seat handle. The plastic handle features a strong adhesive that sticks to the underside of a toilet seat. The handle prevents people from having to touch the toilet seat with the intent of helping to limit the mess — since you have enough to deal with already.

Decorative Faux Coffee Table Books With Blank Pages For Drawing Or Scrapbooking

You will love the look of this set of three decorative faux coffee table books. Inside, you won’t find inspirational messages about the journey to find happiness, but you will find blank pages that are suitable for drawing, scrapbooking, or journaling. The books are heavy and large, and they look great paired with other decor.

Easy-To-Use Oil Sprayers With Measurements To Better Control The Amount Used

Maintain control over the amount of olive oil you use in a recipe with this set of two oil sprayers. The bottles, crafted from transparent glass, can be filled with other liquids as well, like vinegar, soy sauce, salad dressing, and various types of oils. The sprayer produces a uniform spray and features measurements.

A Spinning Candle Carousel That’s Beautifully Mesmerizing

You won’t be disappointed with this handcrafted spinning candle carousel. The beautiful mobile carousel is intended to mesmerize and add elegance and a relaxing vibe to your space. The candle is made with natural ingredients, and the stunning jar can be used as home decor when the candle has completely burned.

Beyond Cute Pizza-Themed Cork Beverage Coasters

Pizza night is about to be even more fun with the purchase of this set of four pizza-themed coasters. The eye-catching cork coasters won’t just protect your tables from condensation damage, they’re also a conversation starter. Plus, they’re packed in an authentic pizza box, making them a super fun gift.

Best-Selling Mesh Laundry Bags With Auto-Lock Zippers To Keep Delicates Secure

The breathable mesh construction of this three-pack of mesh laundry bags allows your clothes, shoes, and accessories to be thoroughly cleaned in the washing machine. The bags are also a safe way to dry certain delicates. The zipper auto-locks to ensure the clothes, especially delicates, stay inside the bags.

Natural Frankincense Mist Spray With A Long-Lasting Fragrance

This natural frankincense resin mist spray has a lovely scent that isn’t overwhelming. Shake the bottle to activate the fragrance, and just a couple of sprays will last a long time in a small space like a bathroom. The product is known to awaken your senses while cleansing your body, mind, and soul.

Snack-Hiding Bags So You Can Discreetly Hide Your Favorite Treats In Plain Sight

Calling all moms — thanks to these genius snack-hiding bags, you no longer have to struggle to hide your favorite treats from your kids. They’ll never look in boxes that look like they’re meant for coffee, breadcrumbs, or super greens, which is what these faux-hiding boxes advertise. They’re reusable and serve as a great way to hide anything in plain sight. Each one comes with a zipper top and a gusseted bottom much like standard groceries.

Transparent Sofa Protectors With Twist Pins That Help Protect From Cat Scratches

If your cat enjoys ruining your furniture by innately scratching whenever they please, you’ll benefit from this six-pack of cat scratch sofa protectors. The transparent shields, which will discourage your pet, can be cut to size. To apply, peel off the adhesive pad and stick it onto the sofa. If needed, you can use the provided twist pins.

City-Themed Soy Wax Candles With Different Scents

The perfect gift for someone who is missing home, these soy wax-scented candles feature different scents for different cities. Each scent captures the unique charm of the various cities, like coffee and chocolate, for example, for San Francisco. The typical burn time of the 13.7-ounce candle is 60 to 80 hours.

A Clever Double Closet Rod That Hangs From Any Standard Rod

To double your closet space without paying loads of money to a custom closet company, check out this double closet rod. The rod hangs from any standard closet rod and provides an additional rod below your hanging clothes. Of course, you’ll need to make sure there’s enough space for clothes to hang so they don’t drag on the floor.

Wall-Mounted Mug Holders That Don’t Require Drilling

Stick this two-pack of wall-mounted mug holders above your coffee bar or kitchen countertop to always have your mugs or cups right there. The metal racks can each hold four cups or mugs in an upside-down position. The racks can also double as a spot to air dry mugs after washing them. Since they come with adhesive, there’s no need for drilling.

An Herb Saver To Prolong The Life Of Herbs & Veggies By Up To 3 Weeks

If you’re over your herbs going bad after just a few days, give this herb pod a try. The pod fits into the side door of a standard refrigerator and is designed to prolong the life of your herbs, and it even works with asparagus. Refilling the water every three to five days will leave you with fresh herbs for up to three weeks.

Bathroom Organizer Trays That Looks Like Marble But Is Actually Made Of Dishwasher-Safe Silicone

Use this two-pack of marble bathroom trays as a spot to hold your toiletries or home decor like candles and decorative trinkets. Each large tray features a unique marble design that looks like real marble, except they are silicone, making them shatterproof and safe to throw in the dishwasher if they need a quick clean.

A Relaxing Handcrafted Salt Lamp Filled With Massage Balls That Sets A Gorgeous Ambiance

Create a relaxing ambiance in your living space with this handcrafted Himalayan salt lamp bowl. When plugged in, the bowl lights up and acts as a dimmable lamp. The balls can be used as massage balls, adding an extra touch of relaxation. It makes a fantastic gift, especially for your spouse or partner who you’d appreciate a massage from.

A Stylish Corner Shelf That’s Available In 5 Color Options

This stylish four-tier corner shelf will look great in any room while holding home decor and accessories like books, candles, picture frames, and trinkets. According to shoppers, the corner shelf is easy to put together and takes no time at all. It’s available in five color options — each just as pretty as the next.

Adorable Prints For The Playroom Wall That Come In A Pack Of 6

Add an adorable retro aesthetic to your child’s bedroom or playroom when you hang these six hand-drawn prints. The prints are printed on thick cardstock, but they don’t come framed. This does, however, give you more of an option as to how you want to display the wall art, whether it’s by using picture frames, handing frames, tape, binder clips, etc.

Machine-Washable Packing Cubes In Small, Medium & Large Sizes

Pack smart when you use this set of six travel packing cubes. The durable packing cubes come in three sizes: large, medium, and small. They fit in full-size luggage as well as carry-ons, and they are perfect for fitting all types of essentials. The cubes feature side handles for easy portability, they’re machine washable, and they come in a variety of color options.

An Illuminating Crescent Moon Lamp With A Dimmable LED Light

Perfect for a nursery, kid’s room, or playroom, this illuminating crescent moon lamp provides a warm white LED light and a soothing glow. The battery-operated lamp is dimmable with a touch-sensitive control panel. Choose from three fun shapes: a silver half-moon, a golden full-moon, and a pretty golden star.

Privacy Window Tinting Film That Reflects Sunlight & Comes In 11 Designs

This one-way window tinting film reflects sunlight to help keep your home at a cool temperature when the weather is warm. It also provides some privacy during the day, although it’s not a solution for privacy at night. The film comes in four sizes and 11 cool designs. Installation is simple, as it adheres to windows in minutes.

A Waterproof Under-Sink Mat Available In 15 Sizes To Protect Cabinets From Leaks & Spills

Install this under-sink mat to protect the floor of a cabinet from liquid damage due to plumbing leaks or spills. The shelf liner can be removed and cleaned or wiped down when needed. It’s flexible and textured, and it can hold up to 3.6 gallons of liquid in the event of a leak. There are 15 sizes to choose from so be sure to measure the space.

Silicone Chair Leg Floor Protectors That Come In A Variety Of Colors

There’s a lot to love about this 16-piece chair leg floor protector set. The silicone protectors fit over the bottom of chairs and tables to prevent scratches on the floor, and their design ensures they won’t fall off. They come in a variety of colors and sizes to best match most furniture, and you can also buy them in packs of eight and 32.

A Cocktail Mixing Glass Set That Looks A Lot More Expensive Than It Is

Whether you consider yourself a professional bartender or an amateur who only crafts drinks at home, this high-quality cocktail mixing glass set is a must-have. The set includes a cocktail shaker, a Hawthorne strainer, a Japanese jigger, a bar spoon, and a polishing cloth. It’s a sturdy and elegant set you won’t regret adding to your bar.

A Bedside Water Carafe With A Cup That Doubles As A Lid

Keep up with your hydration at night with this sweet bedside water carafe. The elegant glass carafe can hold up to 16 ounces of water, and it comes with a cup that holds 10, which also doubles as a lid for the carafe. The carafe is designed to allow for drip-free pouring. Check the listing to find several carafe designs to match the aesthetic of your space.

Wireless LED Stair Lights That Are Motion Activated

When motion is detected within 10 feet of these wireless LED stair lights, a motion sensor automatically turns the lights on, and after 30 seconds of no movement, the lights turn off. The installation process consists of screws or heavy-duty adhesive tape — both included. They’re designed for indoor use and will add extra visibility and safety wherever they’re placed.

A Nonstick Crepe Pan With A Heat-Resistant Handle That Stays Cool

The beauty of this nonstick crepe pan is that it features a heat-resistant handle that stays cool while cooking, so you won’t have to use an oven mitt while flipping your pancakes. Made of cast aluminum, the pan is lightweight at just two pounds, and it heats quickly and evenly. Choose from four colors and a 10 or 12-inch pan.

A Spacious Makeup Organizer That’s Easy To Assemble

Keep your makeup looking neat and decluttered with this four-layer makeup organizer. The transparent organizer has two roomy drawers and two shelves that can hold loads of makeup and accessories. It also features removable dividers so you can set up the space as you please. It’s easy to assemble, which is always nice.

Ridiculously Cute Helmet Toothbrush Cover Caps That Come In A Pack Of 4

Does your family need helmet toothbrush cover caps instead of boring covers? The answer is yes. This four-pack of ridiculously cute helmet-shaped caps keeps your toothbrush from collecting particles and bacteria that are quietly floating around the bathroom. They come in four colors so everyone knows which one is theirs.

An Electric Indoor Tabletop S’mores Maker With Trays To Hold The Goods

This electric tabletop s’mores maker brings the fun of campfire s’mores inside. With the flameless burner in the middle, the outskirts of the s’mores maker features four trays for chocolate, graham crackers, and marshmallows so you can everything right where you want it. Two stainless steel roasting forks come in the kit.

Brilliant Loose Outlet Fixers That Create A Snug Fit For Plugs

The brilliance of these loose outlet fixers is astounding. To use, simply plug one of the transparent plastic plugs into an outlet to instantly improve the electrical connection between the outlet and whatever is plugged in. They prevent plugs from falling out. Twenty-five of them come in a pack, so you’ll be set to equip the whole house.

A Transparent Flower Vase That Blends In On A Book Shelf In Just The Right Way

Take a look at this super unique and stunning acrylic flower vase that blends into books on a bookshelf in the best way possible. The transparent, narrow vase is shaped like a book, so when it’s set next to books, it really brings the shelf to life. It makes a great gift for book lovers who also appreciate flowers.

A Space-Saving Hanging Laundry Hamper With A Bottom Zipper For Quick Unloading

The large capacity of this hanging laundry hamper allows you to throw in more dirty clothes than the average hamper can hold. Made of Oxford fabric, the hamper is sturdy and washable. A unique zipper design at the bottom of the hamper gives you quick access to your clothes on laundry day.

Sturdy Wire Mesh Fruit Baskets To Keep Fruit Fresh For Longer

Store fruit and vegetables in this breathable wire mesh fruit basket to keep them fresh for longer. With your purchase, you’ll receive four sturdy baskets with lids in various colors. Each basket measures around 10 inches in diameter, so it’s spacious enough to hold plenty of fruit without taking up an enormous amount of space on your countertop.

Wall-Mounted Necklace Organizers That Can Be Installed With Just Adhesive

Once you have these chic necklace organizers mounted to a wall with either the included adhesive or nails, you’ll be impressed with how much easier it is to find the necklace you want to wear. Two holders come in the pack for a total of 20 hooks. The hooks are generously spaced and can be used for hanging bracelets, dangly earrings, and keys. You can buy them in white, rose gold, and clear.

A Liquid Plastic Welding Kit To Instantly Bond A Variety Of Materials

Add this liquid plastic welding kit to your existing home tool kit. The UV resin glue kit instantly bonds various types of materials, including plastic, fabric, metal, rubber, and wood. Once the glue is cured with the included UV LED light, you can mold or shape it before leaving it to bond.

A Chic Diffuser That Lasts For Months

This tranquil oil diffuser is a modern way to add some aromatherapy to your living space or office. The glass diffuser features a wooden lid and comes with sticks. The scent is a mix of coconut, cream, sugar, rose, lily of the valley, cedar wood, and vanilla, and the fragrance will last for several months.

A Quiet Cool-Mist Humidifier With A Large 2.5-Liter Tank

The 2.5-liter tank on this cool mist humidifier is a great size for a large room. A top-fill tank makes it easy to add water, and a detachable design lets you reach all the nooks and crannies when cleaning. This humidifier is extra quiet at 26 decibels, which is around the equivalent of a whisper, and all the lights can turn off for a peaceful sleep.

Herb Scissors With A Rubber Handle That’s Safe To Throw In The Dishwasher

Cutting herbs can be time-consuming, but not when you use this highly efficient herb scissor set. The shears feature five sharp, anti-rust, stainless steel blades that come with a cover for safety while it’s stored. They are safe for the dishwasher, which makes cleaning a breeze. The handle is made of comfortable nonslip soft rubber.

A Cute Desktop Memo Holder That Comes With A Notepad

This cute little donkey desktop memo holder is the perfect office accessory that you probably didn’t know existed until now. The plastic holder comes with a notepad, and when the papers run out, you can fill it with sticky notes. The mouth of the donkey is also a clip to hold memos or a writing utensil.

A Colorful Glow-In-The-Dark Throw Blanket Made Of Soft Fleece

Curl up in this colorful glow-in-the-dark blanket next time you want to be cozy. Made of soft flannel, the blanket is lightweight and warm. After being exposed to light for 15 to 20 minutes, the blanket will glow when the lights are off. It’s available in four sizes, and if mushrooms aren’t your thing, there are several other fun designs available to choose from.

Disposable Mats For Under A High Chair To Make Cleanup Way Easier

Babies and toddlers are messy — that’s no secret — but with this 30-pack of disposable baby splat mats, the cleanup will be a whole lot easier. A mat is placed under a high chair to protect the floors from all the accidental (and intentional) spills. The waterproof mats are also ideal for placing under crafts and sensory toys.

A Goofy Coffee Mug That Comes With A Spillproof Lid

Coffee is intended to bring joy, so you might as well use a coffee mug that’ll add to that joy like this goofy coffee-pot-shaped mug. The 20-ounce mug is a mini version of the retro coffee pot your parents probably still have. It comes with a spillproof travel lid, and it can safely be used on an electric warmer.

Best-Selling Washable Wine Glass Markers For Some Fun Personalization At A Gathering

Use these best-selling wine glass markers at your next gathering to give friends the option to personalize their glasses so no one accidentally drinks theirs. Eight washable markers in bold colors come in the box. The markers are nontoxic and food-safe, and they dry fast without smearing.

Freezable Wine Cups With Insulated Walls Filled With A Cooling Gel

Chill your wine to the perfect temperature with this two-pack of freezer wine cups. The insulated walls of the wine tumblers are filled with cooling gel that works as a whine chiller when frozen. An insulated silicone band creates a comfortable spot for you to hold the cups so your hand doesn’t freeze.

A Handy Folding Board That Perfectly Folds All Types Of Clothes

Make your closet and drawers look neater and more organized by using this folding board to give them the perfect fold. All types of clothes will work with this board, including short and long-sleeved shirts, pants, towels, sheets, and more. The board folds into a small size so it’s easy to store. “I wish I would have bought it sooner! Not only is it fast and easy to use but it also gives the shirts an even and crisp fold (if that makes sense). You would be surprised at how many people are amazed by this board,” said one of its many five-star reviewers.

A Versatile Coffee Mug Warmer With 3 Temperature Settings & An Auto Shut-Off

You can use this coffee mug warmer to keep your coffee or tea at the temperature you choose, but you can also use it to heat a candle without lighting it. Choose from three temperature settings — 170 degrees, 150 degrees, or 130 degrees — as well as three colors. You can also set the automatic shut-off timer for anywhere from two to 10 hours.

Heavy-Duty Shelf Liners For Wire Shelving That Come In A Variety Of Sizes

If you own a wire shelving system, this set of four wire shelf liners will help prevent items from falling through the slots. The sturdy mats sit flat on shelves and are equipped for heavy-duty use and are cut to work with standard shelves. They come in six sizes in either a pack of three, four, or five.

A Cool Decor Accent That Comes In 4 Colors

You don’t have to be a lover of dogs to appreciate the cuteness of this dachshund balloon sculpture, but it does make a fantastic gift for anyone who is. The trendy piece of art is ideal for a bookshelf, coffee table, or anywhere that would add to home decor. It comes in four colors: white, green, silver, and black.

Over 150 Pre-Printed Vinyl Food Container Labels In A Fun White Script

Take your pantry organization up a notch by using these pantry labels for food containers. The labels come in a fun white script, and there are 157 of them to choose from, including pantry items from all-purpose flour to dried fruit to cereal. Made of vinyl, the preprinted labels are water-resistant.

A Cozy Chunky Knit Blanket In Several Color & Size Options

You will not be disappointed with the coziness this chunky knit blanket will bring to your life. Made of chenille, it’s super soft, warm, and heavyweight. It’s also stylish, so it’ll look great draped over a couch or a bed. It’s scored a 4.7 overall on Amazon, with customers loving how warm and dense it is. The blanket is machine washable, comes in three size options, and is available in eight colors.

Light Blocking Stickers That Considerably Dim LED Lights

If LED light from a clock, light switch, or something else in your bedroom gets in the way of your sleep, give these LED light-blocking stickers a try. The stickers can dim light from 50% to 80% and even more if you double up on the sticker. Two sheets come in the set — one full sheet that can be cut to size and one sheet with various shapes.

A Spacious Human-Size Dog Bed Made With Soft Corduroy Fleece That Offers Orthopedic Support

Once you try this spacious human-size dog bed, there’s no going back. The foldable bed is made of soft corduroy and provides orthopedic support and a place for you to comfortably cuddle your dog, your kids, or a partner. It’s also a great place to read a book, nap, or watch TV. The bed comes in nine color options and three sizes to best fit your home.

]]><![CDATA[Gift Shopping For My Tween This Christmas Has Been My Favorite Present Era Yet]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/gift-shopping-for-my-tween-this-christmas-has-been-my-favorite-shopping-era-yethttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/gift-shopping-for-my-tween-this-christmas-has-been-my-favorite-shopping-era-yetFri, 20 Dec 2024 21:31:29 GMT
Dobrila Vignjevic/E+/Getty Images

The influencer gift guides started early this year — I saw some hocking their Amazon storefronts for stocking stuffers back in October — and they all look virtually the same. Gift guides for him include bluetooth speakers and hoodies and fancy sneakers. Gift guides for her are full of coffee table books (please stop) and those little candle warmer lamps everybody has a swipe up link for. But nothing has enraged me more than the gift guides for tween girls. Clean beauty, slippers, ruffled socks — look, I’m sure some 10-year-old girls want those things. But the idea that that’s all anyone can think to gift one is so upsetting.

Because 10-year-old girls have personalities. They have opinions and interests and big ideas and dreams and feelings. They are stuck in that bittersweet stage of feeling big, but also feeling little. Of knowing change is coming and being both excited and nervous about it. Of never feeling quite right and then feeling 100% themselves.

And shopping for my tween this year has been the most magical Christmas shopping ever.

I can specifically remember it being hard to give her Christmas gifts when she was around 7 and 8. It always felt a little like I was just trying to figure her out. She used to love LEGO sets — do I buy her more? She’s getting into books — should I pick a series for her? She has opinions on outfits — is this the year I gift her cute sweaters? It felt like every three months she had a new interest and I was just trying to capitalize on it with gifts.

But at 10, my girl is my girl. She has hobbies now, and not just ones I’ve thrown at her to see if they’ll stick (like all of those never-completed sewing and crochet kits in her closet). She has definite ideas about her bedroom that hasn’t changed since she was 5. She wants to try new things and tells me she wants to spend less time on screens and more time creating. She gobbles up books, carries one with her everywhere she goes, has to be told to “please put the book down when you’re walking.” She loves music, making playlists to listen to while she showers (all by herself!) and is constantly playing games with me where she wants me to guess the millennial boy band within the first few seconds of her playing a song (I never lose). She loves a board game and still loves a stuffed animal.

And that’s why Christmas shopping for her this year has been so fun.

She asked for a ventriloquist dummy, roller skates, and mini LEGO sets. She wants one of those fuzzy terrycloth headbands to wear when she washes her face, and she also wants a new book of Mad Libs. She spends so much of her time drawing comics, so I ordered her a blank comic book to fill out, and then I threw a tumbler with her zodiac sign on it into my cart for her stocking. Her grandparents bought her new bedding after they heard she wants to redo her bedroom, and piano sheet music of Taylor Swift songs because they see her heart.

Her personality has exploded in the last year, and instead of thinking, “Oh I think she’ll like that” and then worrying she’ll toss it aside an hour later, I know exactly what will delight her for Christmas. It feels like shopping a bit for my own 10-year-old self — just a funny, smart, bookish weirdo of a kid who loves to go against the status quo. I can’t wait to help her write jokes for her own sets with her dummy.

Because this cusp of big and little, this cliff she’s standing on between elementary school and puberty? It’s not so scary. Here, she can still reach her skincare and a unicorn blanket. Here, she can ask me in the same breath for a crossbody bag and a stuffed baby koala. Here, she gets to fully embody what girlhood means to her — before someone tells her she’s too big to enjoy it or too little to understand it. She’s in the perfect sweet spot for Christmas — still keeping her heart wide open to faith and belief, while fully understanding what it means.

Here, Christmas — and Christmas shopping — is still magical.

]]><![CDATA[This Woman Made A 2024 Wrapped For Her Marriage & It's Hilarious]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/entertainment/marriag-wrappedhttps://www.scarymommy.com/entertainment/marriag-wrappedFri, 20 Dec 2024 20:38:01 GMT
TikTok/@Frankliner116

It’s always so fun to watch your annual Spotify Wrapped (unless, like many parents, your music stats have been hijacked by your kids). It’s cool to see what your year was like, reflect on your favorite times, and look forward to the future. It’s easy to wonder: Wouldn’t it be cool if we had Wrapped for other parts of our life?

Enter @Frankliner116 on TikTok, who had the adorable and hilarious idea to do a Marriage Wrapped 2024 about her and her husband. The results were amazing.

She has viewers laughing from the first line: “In 2024, I had one husband,” she begins, with a straight face. “I’ve had this husband for 27 years.”

Then the stats get serious.

“In 2024, we went on 11 dates,” she continues, referring to her slide presentation. “We’ve had 67 arguments — or should I say heated discussions. They most popular topics of these arguments are recycling, dinner, and AI.”

See, if you argue with your partner about AI, you are not alone!

She continues with more stats, which really double as a gentle ribbing of her relationship.

“We have had 577 video calls,” she states. “He has shared 16,783 TikToks and Reels. All of them fall into one of the following five categories: recipes, restaurants, things to buy, freaky stuff, and things only he finds humorous.”

But even though she jokes, you can really see how sweet their relationship is.

“We have gone three days without a hug or a kiss, but that was only because I was out of town,” she says.

Just when we think we might get some spicy stats, the video cuts off dramatically for a moment — and when we return, she’s wrapping up her wrapped.

“It’s been a pretty good year. I give us an A-,” she finishes. “Why? Because we really haven’t been on enough dates. We’re going to work on that in 2025.”

“I’ll be tuned in to next year’s marriage wrapped,” writes one of the most popular comments.

“This is so cute, actually,” wrote another.

“Marriage goals,” wrote a third.

Here’s to more dates in 2025 for this cute couple. And here’s to looking back on the year to remember the good times and bad (those recycling tiffs!) and to reflect on how we can improve our relationships.

]]><![CDATA[One In 4 Parents Threaten To Take Away Their Kids' Christmas Presents]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/threaten-to-take-christmas-presents-awayhttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/threaten-to-take-christmas-presents-awayFri, 20 Dec 2024 17:56:38 GMT
fotostorm/E+/Getty Images

It can be so hard to discipline young kids in the right way. Toddlers and preschoolers are notorious worldwide for their stubbornness, tantrums, and boundary-testing. And at the same time, the parents of young kids are often sleep-deprived, burned out, and worn down. It can be a bad combination, and it can be so, so hard to discipline your children without being a jerk at the same time. Add in some holiday stress, and it’s an uphill battle.

A new national poll has found that threats are the number one type of discipline that parents use on their preschoolers (kids aged 3 to 5), even though threats are not found to be the most effective way to parent. And a full 25% of parents admitted that they’ve threatened to take away their kids’ Christmas presents or threatened that they’d tell Santa to skip their house.

Half of parents said they use bribes, too. And 40% admitted to spanking — physical discipline that is tied to poor outcomes and that is not recommended by doctors.

The information, collected by The University of Michigan Health C.S. Mott Children's Hospital National Poll on Children's Health, comes from 725 respondents, all of whom had at least one child in between the ages of 1 and 5.

Parents admitted that they have trouble staying consistent or picking the right types of discipline for the situation, in many cases because they are tired, frustrated, or just at the end of their rope. One-fourth of respondents say that they are too irritated or too tired to remember to use proven discipline strategies.

It’s the reason that many parents have threatened their kid with leaving the park if their kid throws sand one more time, even if they don’t plan on following through.

"Discipline helps young children learn what behaviors are safe and appropriate and can play a crucial role in helping them learn the difference between right and wrong," Mott Poll co-director Dr. Susan Woolford told Science Daily. "Empty threats, however, undermine trust and credibility and aren't usually effective. Positive reinforcement and consistent discipline are more likely to shape long term behavior."

What strategies work best for toddlers and preschoolers?

For kids who are very young, discipline doesn’t even make sense to them. In this case, experts including Woolford recommend redirection and distraction, noting that kids at this age aren’t deliberately misbehaving.

For kids who are in preschool, empty threats, spanking, and yelling are not as effective as consistent, logical consequences. For example, Woolford says, if your kid deliberately knocks over a drink, the logical consequence is having them clean up the mess.

Time outs and setting limits are two other effective tools at this age.

And consistency is as important as anything.

"It's important for parents to plan ahead and be on the same page with discipline strategies to provide a foundation for understanding expectations and prevent sending mixed signals about boundaries,” she told Science Daily.

In addition, Woolford adds that discipline should not exist without positive reinforcement when the child is behaving well.

"Balancing correction with positive reinforcement — like praise and rewards — helps children build self-esteem while learning from their mistakes."

So, next time you feel like threatening your kids that their presents won’t show up on Christmas morning, take a deep, deep breath and consider a natural consequence or a time out.

]]><![CDATA[The Perfect Age For That First Magic Kingdom Trip Is 3]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/what-age-should-you-take-your-kid-to-disney-worldhttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/what-age-should-you-take-your-kid-to-disney-worldFri, 20 Dec 2024 15:44:09 GMT
Katie McPherson

It’s the question every parent asks themselves, when their young child can’t watch enough Cars or Frozen. At what age should you take your kid to Disney World? Park tickets and lodging aren’t cheap, so it’s hard to know when it’s worth the money to take the whole fam. I can’t speak for every park, but when it comes to Magic Kingdom — the most iconic one of all, if you ask me — I say the perfect age is 3.

A few weeks ago, my husband and I found ourselves at the gates of Magic Kingdom, waiting with bated breath to see how it would register with our 3-year-old son, Cooper. I was invited on a media trip to see Disney’s latest cruise ship, the Treasure, and it included a stop at Disney World along the way. Our first stop was the Main Street Confectionery to get our kid the biggest lollipop on planet Earth. Once we had secured the bag, knowing this treat would keep him patient and pleasant while we made our way to the rides, we set off.

My main concerns with theme parks, and the reason we’d never taken our son before, was that he was scared of rides. I wasn’t sure this trip would be much better, but we started small: on the Tomorrowland Speedway, where we could take a slow drive around. He was hooked. Gleeful, we bought the multi pass Lightning Lanes, which cost around $90 for the three of us to get three passes each. We knew it was worth it to get him on as many rides as we could, with as little time for impatience or tantrums as we could achieve.

We rode Under the Sea, Cooper’s favorite, and I loved watching him marvel at the special effects and animatronics. Then It’s A Small World, which he loved for all the same reasons, and he still sings the song around the house. The Dumbo ride is where he really shone, bravely yanking that joystick upward to lift our elephant into the air after making me swear up and down I’d leave it at the lowest setting.

After we had used up our Lightning Lanes and exhausted all rides with short wait times, we strolled around looking for the perfect dinner spot and some light shopping. “I like this place!” Cooper exclaimed from his stroller, massive lollipop still clutched in a chubby fist. My kid is a major homebody — he’d rather stay home and play with his toys than do just about anything — so this was exceptionally high praise from him.

As we were heading toward the park’s exit, we heard music coming from the plaza in front of Cinderella’s castle. On stage, Mickey, Minnie, Goofy and crew, along with Tiana, Elsa, and more iconic princesses, danced and sang. Olaf was there too, to my son’s delight. I hoisted him up to see and we was absolutely rapt. When the song ended, Mickey said (with that characteristic laugh), “Haha, isn’t this incredible?” “This is incredible,” my son whispered in return.

Finally, we popped back into the confectionary for some big-as-your-face Mickey Mouse-shaped cookies to snack on back in our hotel room, and then headed to the monorail. We spent about five and a half hours in Magic Kingdom, which I have to say was a truly perfect amount of time. We were tired, but not to the point of being cranky, and the walk back to the monorail wasn’t as agonizing as I felt it might be had we stayed longer. So that’s my other piece of advice for your first trip with a little one: don’t force yourself to spend an entire day if you feel satisfied on magic. Like any substance, for your first time, it is best consumed in moderation.

Will my son have crystal clear memories of this trip when he’s 10, 15, an adult? No way. But I think my husband and I will, and for now, we enjoy chatting with Cooper about the Dumbo ride he was so noble on and the giant lollipop he sucked on for so long his cheeks were stained blue for days. And we will definitely be visiting again soon for more rides, treats, and memories.

]]><![CDATA[This High School Teacher Says Her Students Don't Read Anymore]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/high-school-kids-dont-read-bookshttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/high-school-kids-dont-read-booksFri, 20 Dec 2024 14:19:50 GMT
@stillateacher / TikTok

Does your teen read for pleasure? Do they even read for school? One teacher says that her high school students are totally checked out from the wonderful world of books, noting that there are several different factors to blame for the drop off in kids enjoying the act of reading — especially entire books and novels.

TikTok creator, Ms. C (@stillateacher) shared her disappointment in this realization.

“High schoolers just don't read books anymore. Let's talk about it. This topic has been on my mind all week because on Monday I handed a student a book for a new unit we're starting,” she explained.

She goes on to say that her student admitted to having never finished a book in their life. Other students chimed in, saying they related.

“We ended up having a really interesting discussion where students were asking me, ‘Do you read? Do you read every day? How many books have you read in your life? Can you remember all the books you read?’ And the most interesting question of all was, what is the point of reading a book if you're not going to remember it?”

“So, why haven't they read one before? I started asking kids in my other classes just for fun. When is the last time you read a book? The overwhelming majority of students said eighth grade. It is a known literacy statistic that students start losing interest in reading in middle school and high school. So even those who are like, avid readers of the Percy Jackson series in fourth and fifth grade fall off.

Despite their lack of reading, she says her students have been enjoying the book that the class is reading together. Next, she delves into her theories as to why kids just don’t take to reading like they used to, and yes, of course technology is one of those factors.

Increased pressure from outside activities, desire to hang with friends, and of course, phones all contribute to the lack of literacy in kids today. However, kids are not totally to blame here. In fact, Ms. C says adults need to own their part in all this.

“...adults have lowered the bar for how much you should read as a teenager. So far that the bar cannot be found. There are many educators who have the mindset that you shouldn't teach whole books because kids just won't read them,” she said.

“In the past, I've taught at schools where teaching novels is actually discouraged. And I have conversations with teachers in other content areas who say that they themselves never read books, that they don't think it's important for students' long-term success.”

She also notes that there is a stark difference between the kids who don’t read and the kids that do read.

“I'm telling you the handful of kids I teach who do read are built different. Kids who read have stronger critical thinking skills, more success across all academic areas, and honestly just a stronger sense of self because reading helps you figure out who you are as a person,” she explained.

Several parents chimed in on her video, agreeing that adults hinder their kid’s ability to read.

“My teen loves to read, and school is the biggest hindrance to her being able to read for pleasure. She has NO time. So much homework. She only reads on breaks. Even over TG she had a ton of homework,” one mom said.

“Reading becomes a burden when you're forced to read a bunch of textbooks first and when schools choose the most boring books to assign,” a student said.

In recent years, less than 20% of U.S. teens report reading a book, magazine, or newspaper daily for pleasure, while more than 80% say they use social media every day, according to research published by the American Psychological Association. Based on all the positive researching that has come out about kids who read versus all the negative effects of social media and tech on teens, aren’t our priorities a little mixed up here?

]]><![CDATA[“I Took A More In-Depth Look At My Screen Time Stats. Yikes.” & 19 Other Confessions From Moms]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/i-took-a-more-in-depth-look-at-my-screen-time-stats-yikes-confessionshttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/i-took-a-more-in-depth-look-at-my-screen-time-stats-yikes-confessionsFri, 20 Dec 2024 14:19:22 GMT
franckreporter/E+/Getty Images

I am the best at keeping secrets for others, and the worst at keeping my own. I blurt out everything, from the most embarrassing stuff to the most mundane, and seem to have zero filter on sharing my own nonsense with those around me. But apparently! I’m not alone. This week in Scary Mommy Confessions, moms are officially done with the holidays, but ready to share some of the more wholesome little secrets they’ve got locked in their hearts. From crushes on bosses to being excited about positive pregnancy tests after IVF, Confessions is a nice little dollop of relatable today.

So pour yourself a fresh cup of coffee and send some silent congratulations to total strangers here in Confessions — and then send some patience for the mom whose partner lets their toddler sleep in their bed every night.

Scary Mommy Confessions are a tried-and-true part of what makes our site so fun. If you want to anonymously confess, look for our weekly callouts on Instagram. And to browse past Confessions, head here.

]]><![CDATA[My Kids Figured Out Santa Isn't Real By Analyzing My Handwriting]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/kids-figured-out-santa-isnt-real-by-handwriting-analysishttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/kids-figured-out-santa-isnt-real-by-handwriting-analysisFri, 20 Dec 2024 14:15:30 GMT
Ariela Basson/Scary Mommy; Shutterstock, Getty Images

Let me set the scene for you. In the previous six hours, my 7- and 9-year-old daughters binged on Netflix while I was draped across the couch like a lifeless sardine, glazed eyes staring upward. I felt bad about using screen time to babysit my children while COVID ravaged my body — mom guilt has no boundaries — yet there I was. Was I near death? No. But the situation was dire. There was a pause in the theme music as credits rolled, and Netflix asked, "Are you still watching?" (Obviously yes, we were, Netflix, don't f*cking guilt trip me). The brief lapse in constant entertainment shook my daughters out of their zombie state. Rest time: over. And that's where this story begins.

They wandered around the house, much like the walking dead, wondering what they could possibly do with themselves. They were uninterested in any of their 300 toys haphazardly packed into the playroom and were offended when I asked them if they wanted to read. They soothed their boredom with food — judging by the crinkling noises I heard, at least five bags of Cheez-Its were consumed. Finally, they begged me to take down their memory boxes (full of cute drawings and newborn baby outfits) so they could soak in the mementos of their short and precious lives.

It was a 15-step walk from couch to closet. One that I very much did not want to take. But mom guilt stood at the control panel of my brain. "This will be a good, non-screen activity for them," I said to myself, a bit judgingly. And so I used my last ounces of energy and made the trek across a Lego landmine, past an orgy of naked Barbies, to the goddamn closet.

This may seem like a dramatic account. It's not. And I want you to know all of these details for my defense argument, which will come later. Key phrases you should remember: "Lifeless." "Used the last energy I had." "Body ravaged by COVID."

Here's where things get a little blurry. If I called a medical expert to the stand, they'd testify, "She was ketogenic. Her body was literally eating its muscles because her glucose stores were so low. And because of this, all she could do was sleep." So, yeah, I fell asleep. And when I opened my eyes after feverish couch dreams, I saw that my daughters had lined up all of the letters they'd ever received from the tooth fairy.

Before I proceed, I'd like you to know that while I sometimes let my daughters binge on Netflix, I make excellent tooth fairy letters. Every time my daughters lose a tooth, a different tooth fairy comes. Each note describes how the tooth fairy will use the lost tooth: as a home, an engagement ring, a telescope, etc. And sometimes, the tooth fairies reference each other in their notes. For example, Tooth Fairy Timmy used the tooth as an engagement ring. At the next visit, Tooth Fairy Fiona described how excited she was to be marrying a handsome fairy named Timmy. God, I'm a great mom.

The only problem is, in the beginning, I didn't work that hard to disguise my handwriting. My daughters could barely read at that point, so it didn't seem too important. And that, my friends, was my mortal error. My post-nap brain was foggy, yes, but I could sense there was a full-blown investigation underway. My daughter climbed onto the couch and sat on top of my chest, crushing my already damaged lungs. "Mommy," she said sweetly, putting her healthy face way too close to mine, "Is the tooth fairy real?"

I didn't have the energy necessary for the five billion questions that would follow if I said yes. So, in a reckless parenting act, I said, "No," not quite recognizing the cascade of truths I was now bound to reveal. I just wanted her to get off my chest so I could breathe again. That, and I didn't want her to breathe in the COVID molecules that were exiting my mouth.

Her jaw dropped. "You're teasing!" she said. And it was, in retrospect, a moment when I could have saved myself. Maybe it was the COVID talking, or maybe it was the overwhelming dread I felt when I thought about coordinating another hellish year of Elf on the Shelf. "No," I said, "I'm not teasing."

Then, predictably, they ran down their list of magical creatures who visit us: The Candy Fairy? The Easter Bunny? Santa? "Sorry, girls," I said, wiping the drool off my face, "None of it is real."

"But what about magic?" my daughter wailed. "IS MAGIC REAL?" And that's when I really turned up my parenting to share deep wisdom — enlightenment — that would forever change them. "Love is magic," I said, pausing for the mic drop effect. My daughter glared. "So, magic isn't real." "Basically," I said, rolling over. Much to my surprise, my daughters were less upset than I assumed they'd be, and more intrigued that I'd managed to pull off the Santa heist. My husband, on the other hand, was not pleased.

He walked out of his office after getting off a two-hour conference call. "Daddy!" the girls shouted, "Guess what Mommy told us!" It was then, when his eyes pierced my soul, that the guilt set in. After they left, his glare continued. "How could you?" he whispered.

"Well, for one," my COVID brain said to itself, "I'm sick of all the work that goes into being Santa." Instead, I said, "I am so sorry. That was really dumb of me." I can understand his anger. If roles were reversed, I would have started filing my shank nail. This is where I'd ask the jury to remember: "Lifeless." "Used the last energy I had." "Body ravaged by COVID."

You know how they say after criminals confess murder crimes, they often feel a lot of relief that they no longer have to conceal a secret? Well, I felt the exact same way. But then mom guilt resurfaced, that b*tch. So I tried a tactic I'd seen on Pinterest: I told my daughters that now that they were old enough, they could help be Santa. "Also," I said, "You can be the ones to move the Elf on the Shelf!" I thought they'd be ecstatic. "No thanks, Mom," my youngest said politely, "We'd like you to continue being Santa." "Yeah," said my oldest, "I'm going to forget you told me Santa isn't real."

This is the first year my daughters know about Santa. They still frequently remind me that they expect all Christmas traditions to occur. "If we write a letter to Santa, he's still gonna write back, right?" "Of course," I say, with fake cheerfulness. I gotta admit; I was really hoping I'd be able to drop the Santa act once they knew. But I guess I will have to continue writing my fake Santa notes (the one time of the year I use my cursive handwriting; shout-out to my third-grade teacher). I'll also have to eat the cookies they leave out for Santa and continue to throw away the carrots they leave for Rudolph. Sparkles, our Elf, will be coming back for another December, though this year, I'm using an Elf-on-the-Shelf kit (shout-out to the founder of Your Best Elf for reading last year's article and sending me a kit out of pity).

Did I think it was going to go differently? Yeah. I thought my kids would be devastated — but then magically willing to take over Santa's duties. My friend Saba didn't bring her kids up with the Santa tradition, but her youngest is convinced she’s lying and that Santa is real. I guess when you think about it, the end goal of Christmas was never about them believing a big-bellied, white-bearded man was real. Even my glucose-deprived COVID brain knew the truth: It was never about Santa. That round-bellied man never did sh*t. It's about the fact that we are together, that we have each other. The magic is in the love.

Laura Onstot started writing to maintain her sanity when she left her career as a research nurse to be a stay-at-home mom. Unfortunately, she realized writing only revealed her insanity. She is not humble at all, and finds her own writing very funny. She forces her friends to read every article she writes, because praise is her drug of choice. You can find more of her writing at lauraonstot.com.

]]><![CDATA[How To Address Your Kid's Insecurities, According To One Creator's Mom]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/how-to-address-your-kids-insecuritieshttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/how-to-address-your-kids-insecuritiesFri, 20 Dec 2024 13:41:24 GMT
Instagram / @elenawonders

You know your kid is practically perfect in every way, which is why it’s so heartbreaking to realize that they don’t necessarily feel the same way about themselves.

Managing your child’s insecurities is no easy task, particularly if you don’t have a good framework from your own childhood to work off of. Thankfully for those who do not, Elena Nicolaou can help. She posted a video to Instagram Reels explaining how her mother navigated conversations about her looks as a kid.

“I was a very funny looking little girl, and I mean funny looking, and never little,” Nicolaou explained.

“I knew I was funny looking. I knew I didn't look like the other girls. I was much, much taller. I was much bigger. And you know, you're not an idiot when you're a kid,” she said.

Kids are aware, often painfully so, when they don’t fit in for one reason for another. Nicolaou’s mom’s approach to comforting her daughter didn’t negate that feeling, but didn’t feed into it, either.

“She never told me I was funny looking. She never made me lose weight. She never made a big deal out of it,” Nicolaou said of her mom. “Instead, she told me this. She said, ‘You play the cards that you’re dealt.’ And I knew in my hands, being skinny and cute and blonde wasn't in my deck of cards, so there were other things in my deck of cards that were good.”

“She wouldn't let me feel sorry for myself. She didn't make it ruin my self-esteem. I wasn't allowed to feel sorry for myself because I had other things in my deck of cards,” Nicolaou said.

This approach was not only beneficial for Nicolaou’s self-esteem, but also for how she was able to look at others.

“That's how I thought of kids growing up in my childhood. They all had a different deck of cards, and we all had a chance to play our hand,” she said.”

Commenters applauded Nicolaou’s mom’s advice.

“Actually loving but grounded advice,” one user said. “I really enjoy this perspective because it’s empowering while also being compassionate to the parts we may not like about ourselves. It also allows us to not judge others because all judgement begins from the self.”

“Your mom is a genius. To turn what could’ve been a big insecurity into the ability to look at all your other strengths is truly a gift your mother gave you as a little girl. And what was great about it is that she wasn’t tricking you — she was just letting you onto a little secret about life,” said another.

We’re definitely writing this one down for future use — but, could we somehow transport a note back in time, too? Let us know if you figure out how to do that, please and thank you.

]]><![CDATA[John Hughes Movie Baby Names, From Ferris To Ryce]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/pregnancy/john-hughes-movie-baby-names-from-ferris-to-rycehttps://www.scarymommy.com/pregnancy/john-hughes-movie-baby-names-from-ferris-to-ryceThu, 19 Dec 2024 21:07:31 GMT
Archive Photos/Moviepix/Getty Images

Baby name inspiration comes from everywhere, but nothing feels as sweet as watching a comfort movie and thinking, “Hey, that’s a nice baby name.” Sure, you can Google “vintage baby names” and unique monikers and gender-neutral names, but I also think you can find all of those categories in one umbrella — John Hughes movie baby names.

Considering Hughes’ movies — like Pretty in Pink, Home Alone, Beethoven, just to name a few — were created in the ‘80s and ‘90s, it makes sense that baby names inspired by his films will feel retro and classic. But there’s also an incredibly unique vibe to all of them, like Ferris or Maizy or Ryce. Even the more common character names, like Emily or Neal, are names that have fallen out of popularity over the years and are now more unique options than some other baby names out there. While choosing some John Hughes movie-inspired baby names, I also noticed a lot of his characters have short, fun names like Ferris or Del, and this kind of punchy name choice is just really cool and versatile.

So if John Hughes movies are already your comfort choice — why not get inspired by them for your own baby’s name?

Samantha

“I can’t believe it. They f*cking forgot my birthday,” is an iconic John Hughes line from Sixteen Candles, starring Molly Ringwald as Samantha Baker. It’s a personal favorite of mine, and I watch it every year around my own birthday, but even without that kind of connection, Samantha is a great baby name to be inspired by. In the John Hughes universe, Samantha is strong, smart, independent, and a darn good friend.

Miles

Uncle Buck is a John Hughes classic starring John Candy as an uncle who has to take over as Mr. Mom for a few days, and Macauley Culkin plays his nephew, Miles. Miles is curious, funny, and lovable as a character, but the name is also a nice short, spunky choice for those who want something a little more unique than Liam.

Andrew

You don’t have to really like or relate to Emilio Estevez’s character Andrew in The Breakfast Club, but if you want a classic name, this is it. It means “manly,” “brave,” or “courageous” and is such a great name with a vintage vibe.

Ferris

I mean, come on. If you name your kid Ferris, people are absolutely going to assume you’re a fan of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and like, who isn’t? This film is an absolute classic, and Ferris is a pretty unique choice, so you can get yourself a lot of baby name points there.

Cameron

To be fair, Cameron is actually the better person in the Ferris/Cameron duo in the film, so feel free to give this name to your kid, too. It’s a great gender neutral choice, and Cam is the sweetest nickname.

Emily

The moment I realized Beethoven was also done by John Hughes, I just knew why I loved it so much. Emily is the little sister in the film — the one that falls in the pool and is rescued by Beethoven — and I was always kind of blown away by her piano talent when I was a kid. Emily’s another classic name, but you don’t hear it a whole lot anymore on babies. It means “rival” or “eager.”

Maizy

Like her brother Miles, Maizy is a big fan of her Uncle Buck when he comes to take care of them for a few days, and I’m a huge fan of her name. With the fun little spelling, it’s especially unique, and has a sweet and spunky vibe to it.

Claire

Another Molly Ringwald character (she and John Hughes worked very well together, obviously), Claire is the “princess” in The Breakfast Club, but like all Hughes movies, you realize pretty quickly she’s more than just a surface character. The name Claire also means “bright, clear,” which is kind of poignant when you think about it.

Jake

Jake Ryan? Oh the one and only. Jake is the heartthrob of Sixteen Candles and while some of his choices throughout the movie are questionable, he does give our girl Sam a great birthday. I love the name Jake, and you can just go ahead and skip Jacob and go right to this fun nickname.

Ryce

I always loved the name Ryce in Beethoven, but the big sister character is absolutely worth naming your kid after, even if she didn’t have such a cool moniker.

Neal

Planes, Trains and Automobiles is often a Thanksgiving movie tradition for families, so why not pay homage to that by naming your child Neal? It’s another name you don’t hear very often, and the character of Neal is such a good egg.

Del

The John Candy character in Planes, Trains and Automobiles, Del is such a fun choice for a baby name. I fully believe this could be for a boy or a girl, and I like the short and sweet aspect of it.

Andie

OK, we had to include another Molly Ringwald classic — Pretty in Pink. I think John Hughes loved spunky, short names for his characters, and Andie is definitely one of them. It’s such a fun choice for a baby, and I love the spelling — whether it’s short for a name like Andrea or just stands alone.

Duckie

So Duckie is technically a nickname in Pretty in Pink, but why not use it if you’re a major John Hughes fan? It’s a very fun, unique choice, and obviously you could use this one for a little boy or a little girl.

John Hughes was an incredible storyteller, and giving your baby a name from his universe feels pretty perfect. Choose your favorite, watch the movie, and give yourself all the warm fuzzies.

]]><![CDATA[Why Do Dogs Get The Zoomies? A Vet Explains The Adorable Behavior]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/why-do-dogs-get-the-zoomieshttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/why-do-dogs-get-the-zoomiesThu, 19 Dec 2024 19:29:17 GMT
Maria Korneeva/Moment/Getty Images

You know you love it — those wiggly-bodied, rug rippin’, can’t-contain-the-excitement zoomies your dog gets after a bath, a chilly trip outside, or whenever you get home after a long day. But exactly why do dogs get the zoomies? It’s sort of a funny habit, to be so excited by something that the only way to cope is sprinting around until they’re panting. We asked a veterinarian why dogs zoom when they do, what purpose it serves, and if they enjoy it as much as they look like they do.

Why do dogs get the zoomies?

“There are many reasons dogs can get the zoomies. Often it can be from excessive energy, boredom, happiness, pent-up energy, or relief of stress,” says Dr. Carly Fox, senior veterinarian in the emergency and critical care unit at the Schwarzman Animal Medical Center.

Fox says her own pup tends to get the zoomies after she lets him out of the crate that he sleeps in overnight. Chances are, you’ve noticed there are certain times of day or habits that make your dog take off running too. Why is it always right after a good poop, a bath, or a walk that they need to kick up their heels?

“They will typically zoom after a bath or defecation to release pent-up energy or stress,” says Fox. “Also, since baths and walks are part of their routine, zoomies allow them freedom to celebrate something they are done with.” If you’ve ever finished up a work task and felt the need to zoom, you can probably relate.

Are the zoomies good for dogs?

Stress relief is good, right? And so is burning off pent-up energy, at least in humans. And yes, the same holds true for our canine companions.

“If you have ever watched a dog with the zoomies, it definitely appears to make them very happy and can be good for them! Of course, make sure they are zooming in a place where they can't hurt themselves or others, or run into anything sharp or dangerous,” Fox advises.

In fact, she says zoomies have been observed in all kinds of animals, from cats and hamsters to exotic animals in zoos and in the wild. So, it stands to reason that the zoomies are animals’ instinctual way of letting off a little extra excitement or stress.

]]><![CDATA[Daughter Shares Boomer Mom's Epic Christmas Text To The Family Chat]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/boomer-moms-epic-christmas-texthttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/boomer-moms-epic-christmas-textThu, 19 Dec 2024 16:22:49 GMT
@moillyneena / TikTok

As we approach the holidays, it’s time to get everything set! Wrap the presents, grab the last-minute stocking stuffers, and send a meticulously detailed (and slightly unhinged) group text to your family coming for the holidays.

One woman on TikTok, Molly, shared her mom’s epic text with their family group chat, laughing at her mom's absolute wholesomeness.

“I just received the annual group text from my mom regarding the Christmas gathering at her house, and I think it's worth sharing because it's a good one. And my mom just has a way of wording things that just, to me, is funny. I'm not trying to be mean to her. I will show her this TikTok, but it's a good one,” Molly said before prefacing that she bought her mom a family photo session for Christmas.

The text reads:

“Hey, everyone!! 🎄❤️️❤️️ Plans for our family Christmas is next Monday, December 23rd. We are starting out with family pictures at 3 p.m. Molly sent a previous text regarding this. But I'm wanting plain color clothing of your choice. IF YOU CAN, we will take a Christmas-themed one too. So add a pop of red, green, plaid, etc. We will attempt an outside winter-themed one with extras done with individuals too inside if wanted, whatever. Please be prompt ... 😬 😍. Also, we will do a white elephant exchange at $20 along with some fun games and prizes. 💲💲 Opening presents and dinner will be great and delicious. So come hungry and ready for laughter and love. 🕺💲😍❄️💃 Dinner is on us. Don't bring anything unless you need special food choices. Cannot wait to be together, the reason for the season, the birth of Christ and the provider of all we have and enjoy. 🙏 🎄🕊 “

“There, she said it,” Molly jokes.

Firs off, let’s talk about the impeccable use of emojis. She really knocked it out of the park. Secondly, she said what she said! She is asking, kindly, for people to dress in their holiday best and be prompt! Lastly, you can tell this angel of a woman just wants her family to have a good time!

She just wants to be with her family, open some presents, and soak in all the good vibes. She is also not expecting any extra labor from anyone! This is a boomer mom who gets it!

TikTok users shared their own opinions on the epic group text in Molly’s comment section.

“Sounds like you’ve got the BEST MOM EVER….who’s thought about EVERYTHING to make her family’s Christmas experience perfect,” one user wrote.

“introduce her to canva so she can turn it into a ✨newsletter✨,” another suggested.

Some users accused Molly of “mocking” her mom to which she quickly clapped back in an updated video.

“Totally missing the point of the TikTok. Not making fun of my mom, not mocking her. Like I thought it was funny, mostly because it was flawlessly executed, which most of the comments picked up on that,” she said.

“Like she ate and left no crumbs. Every single detail was discussed and we were given instructions. The emojis were obviously elite. You know, like totally not making fun of my mom. And when she sees this TikTok and how viral it's gone, she is going to crack up. Like you guys not making fun of my mom. Like it's insane. Like to even think that. And I totally appreciate her. Like you have no idea. I'm a mom too. I have two adult children. Trust me. I know what goes into organizing family gatherings with adult children. And I am nothing in comparison with my mom. Trust me.”

]]><![CDATA[Mom Saves Hundreds After Thrifting Her Son's Entire Christmas Presents]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/mom-thrifted-christmas-presentshttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/mom-thrifted-christmas-presentsThu, 19 Dec 2024 14:37:29 GMT
nataliejoyjewlery / TikTok

One survey asked parents how much they spent on presents each year — and it turns out that on average, parents spend $173 for each kid. So, if you have three kids, you’re shelling out over 500 dollars on gifts during the holidays just for the kids.

While we can always try to find a good deal on Black Friday or save up for a gift budget, there is nothing like digging up an amazing thrift find. One mom decided that she was going to thrift her son’s entire gift haul for the holidays, and she seriously scored. Her video is truly inspiring if you’re looking to save a couple of bucks and not contribute to the never-ending landfills!

“Last year I thrifted my son's entire Christmas and it was so much fun. He loved opening it. It was very magical. And you guys loved it too because I got over 4 million views. So that was wild. And of course I've done it again,” Natalie says in her video before going through her haul.

First up, an adorable vintage kid’s suitcase.

“When I was a little girl, I had a blue suitcase the same size that said ‘Going to Grandma's.’ It was one of my favorite things. When I saw this and it says "I love grandma" it's not perfect but I know he's going to love this. I filled it with books,” she noted.

A brand new kid’s suitcase plus 10 kids’ books would cost around $50 alone. She snagged both for $26.

She also shows a kid’s lap harp (which run around $26 brand new on Amazon) and an entire Spirogrpah set. If she purchased both brand new, she’d have spent $34.

Next up, she found an adorable beaded alligator purse.

“So, he actually picked this one out himself when we were at Goodwill. It was... $4.99. It's just perfect. I mean it's an alligator purse!” she said.

Afte some sleuthing, it appears this purse was made by a company called The Alligator Farm Gift Shop. They run for around $20. She snagged it for under five bucks!

She also showed a box of blocks that make a medieval castle, a puzzle, and a toy cash register. Brand new, she’d have spent $82 on just these three items.

Then she shows an adorable kid-sized record player.

“I am most excited about this one. It's one of his big presents. My husband owns a record label so vinyl is a very big deal in our house and... So cute. I got it at an estate sale for $18 and I plugged it into the wall. It works. I'm gonna set up a little record area in his room. I just... I'm so excited. He already has some records that we just play on our normal record player but of course when I saw this, I also got him this to give him with the record player,” she shared.

The record player she found it actually a vintage DeJay portable record player. You can find them running for about $50 on Ebay. She snagged hers for under $20.

She also got her son a stuffed elephant, a Little Tikes Story Time Projector (in the box!!!), and Lincoln Logs.

“One item that my son specifically asked for was a Bruder crane truck, and I knew that that would be hard to find from a thrift store. So, I did go on to Facebook Marketplace for this one. It's the only one that I got off Facebook Marketplace and not just from normal thrift store. I got it from a 13-year-old boy for $25,” she explained before sharing her adorable idea after the truck came broken.

“It is broken. So I knew I had to get creative and I've been thinking about what to do. I have decided I'm going to put a note from Santa in the cab of the truck. The note is gonna say that a couple years ago this fell off of his sleigh and it broke. And he's just had it in the back of his workshop waiting for the right kid who he knew would appreciate it even though it has a flaw. So Santa's gonna add a little extra magic,” she explained.

Lastly, she picked up some fun scissors, an “I Spy” game, a pair of winter gloves, a rubber snake, a little bag of ocean animals, a bag of marbles for their marble run, some stamps and a handful of seashells.

She concluded, “I had so much fun doing that. I got thrifting last January, and I took my time finding things that I know he would love and it's just been a blast. I love thrifting his Christmas. I will do it for as long as I possibly can and I hope you guys loved it too.”

Okay, I did some Googling and research, locating almost all of Natalie’s exact items or close comparisons. I found what they are listed for online. Overall, Natalie could have spent around $485 on everything she got for her son. Instead, she spent $152. GO MOM!

]]><![CDATA[We're Ditching the Family Celebrations This Year & I Don't Feel Guilty About It]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/were-ditching-the-family-celebrations-this-year-i-dont-feel-guilty-about-ithttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/were-ditching-the-family-celebrations-this-year-i-dont-feel-guilty-about-itThu, 19 Dec 2024 14:19:21 GMT
Ariela Basson/Scary Mommy; Shutterstock, Getty Images

The holidays have always been a blissful season of joy, celebration, and spending time with the people I love most. For the last three and a half-ish decades I can’t remember a holiday season where I wasn’t headed to my mom's side of the family on Christmas Eve and basking in the glory of Christmas morning with my immediate family, followed by extended relations later for dinner.

Once I had my own kids I couldn’t wait to share in these and all our other holiday traditions. Yeah, it meant mixing in a few more stops — seeing their dad’s family and their cousins — but the togetherness, the Whobilation (yes, we love The Grinch), and the magic of the season outweighed the chaos. Or at least it had been, up until the last few years.

Every year since they were born, my kids and I dutifully attended these celebrations with both sides of the family. Even though I would have preferred to spend time alone with my kiddos and enjoy the holidays, we made the trips from point A to point B and back again because it made the kids happy (and of course, all the Boomers in our life too). But between growing family issues — political and otherwise — I've decided we're taking a break this year. And let me tell you, people were not happy about it.

Our family has been changing and growing in different directions. Some of us are evolving with the times and are taking a different approach to parenting (by breaking all those generational curses that no one likes to acknowledge even exists). So more often than not, family gatherings almost guarantee a verbal sparing match. Throw the recent election in the mix and it just adds fuel to the fire. It’s hard to see the people you thought you knew your whole life adopt (or overlook and excuse) an entirely different set of values than the ones you all were raised with, and it’s even more painful to explain that to your kids who looked up to them. I’m uncomfortable, the kids are uncomfortable and even though they might not admit it, I’m sure the fam is feeling the tension too. And for the first time in forever, I don’t feel the need to smash all those hard feelings into a box to deal with later — this time I can’t (and won’t) just ‘get over it’.

“Why can’t you put the politics aside and just enjoy time together?”

“This could be the last year we’re all around to celebrate together — why do you have to be so difficult?”

All the unkind words exchanged prompted me to ask myself an important question: Why am I spending time with people who make me and my kids uncomfortable? Why are we subjecting ourselves to terse conversations and non-stop side-eyes? Why is there an expectation for us to bend over backward to make their holidays brighter when ours isn’t?

I was raised to be a people pleaser, to avoid conflict at all costs. But the gift I’m giving myself and the kids this year is to change all of that. I asked my kids what they wanted to do this year. What would bring them joy? How did they want to celebrate the holidays? This year, we’re trading in walking on eggshells and instead spending time at a resort, hitting up the waterpark, and ordering room service.

Don’t get me wrong, it might not be something we do every year, but this year it feels especially necessary. The truth is, sometimes the best thing for everyone is to opt out when the people you're surrounded by make things uncomfortable. I didn’t make this decision lightly. I've always tried to put those feelings aside for the kids, but we've arrived at the moment where enough is enough. I deserve to have an enjoyable holiday season too and this year, that looks like ditching the family celebrations with zero guilt.

Of course, we’ll still enjoy other holiday traditions like going to the Nutcracker ballet. We’ll bake at least half a dozen different kinds of Christmas cookies with the littles, sample a few (to make sure they’re just right), and send a few with my parents to the festivities we miss.

Without fail, the Christmas tree will go up and the elf will find its way to the shelf. It’ll be magical seeing A Christmas Carol (for the umpthzillionth time) at our local theater (even though the Muppets version reigns supreme). It’ll still be a holly jolly holiday season even though we're not going all in on the events (and people) that suck all the joy out of the most wonderful time of the year. To be clear, even though the Boomers in my life think I’m choosing to retaliate or punish them — it’s not really about them. It’s about doing what I think is best for my family.

So even though it's unconventional, this is the choice I'm making for my family and no amount of guilt from my mom — or disapproving lectures from anyone — will stand in the way of that. Who knows, this could be the beginning of a fun new family tradition.

]]><![CDATA[My Son’s Favorite Toy Is A Tampon]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/tampon-periods-son-boyhttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/tampon-periods-son-boyThu, 19 Dec 2024 13:00:24 GMT
rudi_suardi/E+/Getty Images

When my son was a toddler I discovered an essential parenting hack: an inexpensive toy that reliably ate up 15 minutes of our endless days. It was light and portable, easy to stash in a pocket. Plus, I almost always had one on me, or a friend could rustle one up in fair enough condition from the bottom of her purse. Or if I had a quarter or was in a particularly thoughtful bathroom, a fresh one was at my fingertips.

I am talking, of course, about tampons. Or as my young son called them, “rockets.” He delighted in them, would beg for them. I often came upon him creating an elaborate storyline, intelligible only to himself, with a tampon he’d found in a coat pocket or drawer or, let’s be honest, one of the many piles of crap that dotted our apartment. Sometimes he found a whole box — jackpot! Those instances, in all fairness, could get pretty expensive.

Tampons are everywhere, because periods are everywhere. But they are also, for many people, completely invisible. They are part of a secret language one half of the population is fluent in and the other complains about or politely ignores. Though there is of course a wide range most people with uteruses have their period 10 times more frequently than they go to the movies. In her book Period: The Real Story of Menstruation, biological anthropologist Kate Clancy shares research that indicates that the average menstruating person has 451 cycles in their lifetime. And yet, Clancy explains, due to a misogynistic culture that views women’s bodies as broken and suspect and scientific research that has often followed suit, discussing your period, not to mention showing evidence of it (how many shirts have I tied around my waist in horror over the years?) can feel like admitting to some private shame.

Who wants to live like that? Who wants to parent like that?

I didn’t hide the tampons from my son, and in a strange way, his interest in them made me even braver about not hiding them from the world. He played with them in coffee shops and on public transportation, sometimes sucking on the cotton, letting the string dangle from his grinning face. Anytime someone I clocked as a man glanced our way, I smiled smugly. I wanted the other half of the world to stop ignoring periods, one unwrapped menstrual product at a time, like a kind of societal exposure therapy.

My son will be an adult some day, and I want him to not only love his body, but loves the bodies of others. I want him to care for his friends with uteruses as well as those without.

When my son ran into our bathroom one morning and saw me shoving a rocket up my vagina, I decided to explain. I told him how the blood, which was not just blood, lined the walls of his home when he lived in my body for almost a year. It kept him warm. He was interested in all the babies this meant I wasn’t hosting, the fact that he had been an egg like them, that he’d been inside of me from the time I grew inside my own mom. That, though we have been told the egg is passive, “waiting for her prince,” as Clancy puts it, the uterus and everything inside it work wisely and diligently, better than the most elaborate construction site.

After that, I practiced saying, “I have my period,” without shame or covering it up with humor. “I can’t walk you to school today, I have my period.” “Want to snuggle and watch digger videos? I have my period.” It can feel creepy, or even wrong, to think about our children’s reproductive systems, but my son will be an adult some day, and I want him to not only love his body, but loves the bodies of others. I want him to care for his friends with uteruses as well as those without.

I’m not the only one. Many of my female friends with sons talk to them about periods. One made her middle school son carry pads and tampons in his backpack for friends who needed them, just like I’ve done, subconsciously, for 30 years. One, with a now-15-year old, pointed out that his learning about his mother’s menstruation set the stage for his later understanding of his own hormonal changes. Boys have hormones, too, it would seem. Like the patriarchy, private shame hurts men as well.

Like many people, I first learned to shove a “rocket” up my cooch from my older sister. I have a memory of her standing on the other side of the bathroom door — she must have been 14 and I was 12 — trying to coach me while I scrunched up my face in discomfort and puzzled at the horrifying visual instructions from the box. It was like trying to tell someone else’s hands how to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I have a daughter now, too, and she won’t have a sister, something I think about with pain all the time. But maybe, just maybe, her brother carry an extra pad in his pocket, or bring her tea during the many days each month she will wish she could just lie in bed.

I think about the millions of instances of care I’ve shared with my sisters, with friends, with complete strangers. Cradling my grandmother’s fingers as I painstakingly paint her fingernails, receiving my babies from that same sister’s outstretched hands (don’t worry, she’s certified!), helping someone I just met wash the blood off their skirt in a public restroom. I want to make women’s bodies less taboo, yes, but I also do this teaching selfishly. I don’t want my son, born looking and feeling like a man in this society, to miss out on these moments. Parenting is as much about carrying on your lineage as it is about envisioning something new and better. I’m working on it, one month at a time.

]]><![CDATA[Study: 71% Of Household Mental Load Falls On Mothers]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/study-household-mental-load-falls-on-mothershttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/study-household-mental-load-falls-on-mothersWed, 18 Dec 2024 20:24:27 GMT
svetikd/E+/Getty Images

Parenting isn’t easy, period. Obviously, raising a whole child is not for the weak, but add in the invisible labor of homemaking... yeah, it’s a lot. And, moms, if you had a sneaking suspicion that it was a bit more work for you than dad, it turns out you’re not wrong.

A new study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family proves what, let’s be honest, you already knew: moms are carrying the majority of the mental load for their families. The researchers, collaborators from the University of Bath and the University of Melbourne, found that mothers dealt with 71 percent of the “cognitive household labor,” while fathers handled only 45 percent.

“This kind of work is often unseen, but it matters,” explained Dr. Ana Catalano Weeks, one of the lead researchers. “It can lead to stress, burnout and even impact women’s careers. In many cases, resentment can build, creating strain between couples.”

The researchers conducted a survey of 3,000 parents of children under 18 from across the United States, of various ages, races, ethnicities, education levels and family structures. Notably, the researchers also included LGBTQ+ and single parents, making the results relevant for the spectrum of modern families.

The survey asked parents who in their household was responsible for various tasks, in two distinct categories. First, “daily” tasks, like deciding what meals to cook and keeping track of the family calendar, which require constant attention. Then, “episodic” tasks, such as noticing when something like a dishwasher needs a repair, or researching bank accounts or insurance options.

The survey revealed that mothers were responsible for 79 percent of “daily” tasks, more than double of what fathers shoulder, at 37 percent. While fathers take on more of the “episodic” responsibilities, at 65 percent, mothers also handle 53 percent of these tasks, as well.

The researchers noted that the overlap in “episodic” tasks reveals that mothers and fathers duplicate mental work, rather than split it. Even in traditionally male tasks, like organizing family finances, both parents tended to take responsibility, and at similar rates, at 61 percent for mothers and 57 percent for fathers.

This unequal shouldering of household tasks likely extends beyond the home.

“According to Gallup data cited in relation to this research, working mothers are twice as likely as fathers to consider reducing their hours or leaving their jobs due to parental responsibilities,” the researchers explained. “This suggests that the disproportionate mental load at home may be influencing critical career decisions for women.”

The study also combatted the myth that women are “naturally” better parents, or more inclined to household tasks. They found that single mothers and fathers handle mental load equally, with single fathers taking on significantly more responsibility than partnered fathers.

Researchers also found a perception gap between parents. Both parents tended to overestimate their overall share of household responsibilities they took on, compared to the percentage revealed in their task-by-task breakdown from the survey. However, fathers were more likely than mothers to overestimate their share of the mental load, and more likely to assume the load was shared equally, even when it was not.

This unequal distribution of the mental load can, and should, be addressed in conversations between partners. But, Dr. Catalano Weeks pointed out that policy changes can be made to help parents reach more equitable arrangements.

“Going forward, the challenge for governments and employers who care about attracting the top talent is how to create policies that are supportive of both mothers and fathers sharing the unpaid work at home. One policy that comes to mind is well-paid, gender-neutral parental leave — which both the U.K. and U.S. are way behind on compared to the rest of Europe,” she said.

Hopefully, we will someday live in a world where these policy solutions are a reality — but until then, you can just send this study to anyone who dares to suggest you’re not working hard enough.

]]><![CDATA[Why Is My Super Smart Kid Struggling So Much With School?]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/smart-kid-struggling-in-school-expert-advicehttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/smart-kid-struggling-in-school-expert-adviceWed, 18 Dec 2024 20:00:24 GMT
Michael H/Getty Images

Before your child started school, you probably tried to remain realistic about their behavior and performance. You accepted that they wouldn't always be a perfect angel — that you were destined to get a few calls from school or notes in your little one's cubby about errant meltdowns. And if you thought your kid might be gifted, you likely spent a good bit of time and deliberation before allowing yourself to seriously consider that. But if you know your child is very bright (gifted, even), and they get to school and really seem to be struggling, well, that scenario may not have crossed your mind.

Sure, you've heard that smart kids often need additional resources to succeed and are likely to face challenges as they advance in their academic careers. You may even have expected minor social hiccups in the context of "smart kids often get bored, and bored kids can have trouble connecting with kids their age." Sometimes, though, smart kids are exactly where they belong academically... and still, they struggle.

Even if you're not a perfectionist, seeing your child flail is worrisome. It's hard to know if it's an adjustment period, if they were just having a lousy testing day, or if something more significant might be going on. The reality is that myriad issues, bigger or smaller, may affect how your tiny Einstein performs in school. What's important is that you, along with the educators now in your kid's life, respond with support.

"When toddlers and preschool children seem to learn easily and naturally, when they enjoy the company of other children, and are generally well-behaved at home, parents understandably anticipate that they will do well in school. And they usually do — but not always, and not in all learning environments," says Jeanne Huybrechts, chief academic officer at Stratford Schools.

Huybrechts continues, "So, when smart, good children struggle to learn or demonstrate learning in school, or when they manifest behavior at school that impedes learning or relationship development, parents are right to respond with guidance and support for their children so that they can enjoy all the benefits of school. And parents should expect that their child's teachers, who have similar aspirations and expectations for their child, will partner with them in this endeavor."

Why is my child struggling in school?

“There are myriad reasons why a bright, high-functioning child might struggle with written assessments,” says Huybrechts, “including undiagnosed learning or attention differences, poor test-taking skills or under-preparation, and anxiety brought on by internal (perfectionism) or external (pressure) factors. Similarly, children ‘misbehave’ at school and at home for reasons that include insufficient stimulation (boredom), an unmet need for autonomy or agency, undiagnosed neurodivergence (ADHD, for example), or social anxiety brought on or magnified by transitions — from one grade or school to another, for example. I’ve seen that many times!”

Breaking it down:

  • Undiagnosed learning/attention differences
  • Poor test-taking skills/under-preparation
  • Anxiety (brought on from multiple places)
  • Boredom
  • Unmet agency

What should you do if your child is struggling in school?

“Keep talking to your child, and make sure the conversations with your child are inclusive and low stakes,” suggests Toby Walker, vice president of BASIS Independent Schools. “That way, they can just talk about what is going on at school in a comfortable way, knowing you are trusting and supportive of them. For example, if you have established routines with your child, you can start this conversation to make your child comfortable talking about concerns they might have. Some parents regularly talk with their kids while walking to the bus, or perhaps you have time together as a family talking after dinner.”

Think of talking to your child as a “fact-finding mission.” In most cases, you and your kiddo might not be able to solve the problem together. But a low-key, no-pressure chat can help uncover issues you might not know exist. You might be able to offer a few ideas on how you two can work together to fix things, but remember the “it takes a village” adage.

“Importantly, do not be afraid to have conversations with your student’s teacher and school around concerns that you or your child may have,” reminds Walker. “Good teachers and good schools want to be able to understand what is happening with a child at home and school. Don’t be afraid to open those channels of communication.”

Gigi Schweikert, parenting and education expert and CEO of Lightbridge Academy, agrees that communication is vital. “It’s important for parents to voice the problems that the child may be facing to their teacher. This is something the teacher may already be trying to address in the classroom, and together, the parents and teacher can create a plan so the child can succeed.”

How can you help your child succeed and not add stress?

“Parents can support young children that are struggling behaviorally or academically by creating a structured routine, celebrating small achievements, and offering emotional validation to help boost their confidence,” suggests Schweikert. “Breaking tasks into bite-sized and manageable steps can prevent becoming overwhelmed, while open communication ensures the child feels understood. Patience is key, as progress takes time and every child learns differently. It is also important to schedule breaks for fun and relaxation, which can help reset a child’s mindset, making them more open to learning.”

You might already know to break things down into smaller tasks at home. Instead of “clean your room,” it’s “pick up your books,” followed by “put your laundry in the hamper.” But we often let our kids sit down with a packet of homework without really processing how overwhelming that might be. Try suggesting doing one worksheet or subject now and then taking a “brain break” before starting on another.

Huybrechts mentioned unmet agency or autonomy. School is so structured without much room for choice. If the strict demands are weighing on your kiddo, find other ways to give them choices:

  • “Do you want to do math or science homework first?”
  • “Do you want to use your Halloween pencil or your sparkly pencil?”
  • “Do you want to help me pick out warm clothes for school tomorrow?”

When is it time to bring in doctors, therapists, or other experts?

"Ideally, resolving school-based issues stays within the circle of child, parent, and teacher as they are closest to the situation and the most capable of identifying root causes, implementing steps to resolution, and providing feedback and encouragement to each other," says Huybrechts. "This can take some time, monitoring, learning, and unlearning. I've worked with middle schoolers who, for one reason or another, had adopted study and organizational methods that were quite ineffective. They spent a lot of time preparing and studying for tests only to be disappointed and have to 'unlearn' before they could move forward.”

So, when do you escalate the issue to get your kid more help?

“If, as a parent, you feel that your child's teacher, possibly because of inexperience, is not in a position to provide the guidance you need, you can always escalate to a principal or counselor,” Huybrechts suggests. “But hopefully, this is an unused option, as the principal will not know your child as well as their teacher. Certainly, if your child's teacher or the principal suggests a neurological or psychological basis for your child's learning or behavior challenges, you should see a professional in that area. Good schools can usually refer you to someone."

If you think your child might be neurodivergent, don't hesitate to bring it up to your child's teacher. They have no doubt worked with dozens or hundreds of kids over the years and might be able to confirm or deny your concerns. If you think they're wrong, push further. Talk to your child's doctor. Many schools have therapists and counselors who can also talk to your child, get a better read, and help you figure out your next steps.

"I recommend talking to outside help when the struggles persist in the classroom after working directly with their teacher," shares Schweikert. "At this point, it may be causing additional stress for the larger family, and help from outside the classroom can help to bring a new perspective and solution."

Remember that whether it's a matter of simple relearning, finding new study approaches, or your child receiving a new diagnosis, none of this is the end of the world. The sooner you find the issue and work to address it, the better chance your child has at succeeding later in school and life.

]]><![CDATA[When Do You Have Sex? 16 Moms Share When They Have Sex With Their Partners]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/when-do-you-have-sex-moms-sharehttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/when-do-you-have-sex-moms-shareWed, 18 Dec 2024 19:51:21 GMT
Kathrin Ziegler/DigitalVision/Getty Images

Sex is one of those pillars of a relationship that has been scrutinized and analyzed so much that it almost feels like you’re doing it wrong if you go against any cliché relationship advice. The one that gets me the most is “be spontaneous,” as if consistency in your sex life is a bad thing. A big part of that spontaneity comes in timing, like when you have sex or what time you have sex with your partner. It’s one thing to be young and unencumbered with children and ready to do it all over the house, but it’s another when you’re a parent and having sex at any old time is no longer possible.

They say we hardly ever know the truth about someone’s sex life because everyone is lying to make themselves feel (or sound) better about their reality, but we reached out to a whole bunch of moms who were willing to tell us exactly when they’re having sex. We don’t care about how often or how vanilla or filthy the sex is; we just want to know when. When are you doing it?

Some of the answers will surprise you — but that’s supposed to happen. We all have our own ideas on when to have sex, the best time to have sex, the sex time that works for each of us, so to hear someone say something totally opposite might shock you. But let these answers be both an inspiration and a balm if you’re worried about your sex life — there is no right or wrong time.

The Early Horny Birds

“I love morning sex so much. We’re both early birds who naturally wake up around 5:30 or 6 every morning, so we just do it then.” — Tara F., mom of three

“My partner and I have always liked morning sex. I think it’s because she used to work a lot of overnight shifts when we first started dating, and she’d come home and we’d have sex at like 5 a.m. before she went to sleep and before I woke up. It just feels like our time still.” — Hannah R., mom of two

“We set an alarm twice a week to wake up and have sex. I know that sounds crazy, but I’ll get up and put on lingerie and we have our toys charged and it always feels little like a sex vacation or something. Even at 4 in the morning. And then we go back to sleep after until our kids wake up.” — Emma T., mom of four

“We’ve started having sex after the kids get on the bus and before my husband leaves for work. It’s like our only alone time that isn’t frantic with worrying about when to pick up kids or if a meeting is about to start or what.” — Julia O., mom of two

The Anytime-Is-A-Good-Time-For-Sex Couples

“Are people actually keeping track of that? Just do it when you’re horny!” — Delilah T., mom of one

“Whenever there’s time. Sometimes that’s in the middle of the night, sometimes it’s in the bathroom an hour before we have to go to work.” — Sarah K., mom of three

“I’m so tired at bedtime, but I’m also not good at planning sex during the day. So basically if I think ‘Wow it’s been a minute since we’ve had sex,’ I’ll text my partner like a boob pic or something and then he’ll come find me in the house. Sometimes that means a quickie in our walk-in closet if the kids are home.” — Jennifer L., mom of three

The House-Is-Empty Opportunists

“We have five kids, so when our last one went off to school, it was a major milestone. I think that first year, we had sex every single day when I got back from dropping the last kid off.” — Megan J., mom of five

“We actually really like daytime sex. We both work from home and all of our kids are in school, so it’s not unusual for us to do it during our lunch breaks.” — Jessica P., mom of two

“During the day, for sure. I’m so exhausted at night and the house is empty during the day, so he comes home on his lunch break and we just bang it out. Literally.” — Theresa R., mom of two

The Bedtime-Is-Sexy-Time Couples

“We always have sex at our bedtime. Like when we go to bed together. There’s not much spontaneity, but we’re happy with that, and it happens at least twice a week.” — Hannah H., mom of one

“We have sex at bedtime after we each take our shower. Almost every night.” — Emily E., mom of two

“I’m a single mom who dates, so really the only time I’m able to have sex is if I’ve gone on a date — and that means a babysitter has put my kid to bed and I’m free to do what I want.” — Lauren J., mom of one

“We like having sex when we go to bed at night.” — Molly W., mom of two

“I know it’s boring, but bedtime. If I don’t pass out immediately.” — Kate T., mom of two

“I can not have sex if our kids are awake and in the house. I just can’t. We always do it at night, like 11:00 or so.” — Morgan G., mom of two

]]><![CDATA[Yes, I'm A Grown Woman & I Pay My Mom To Do My Laundry]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/yes-im-a-grown-woman-who-pays-my-mom-to-do-my-familys-laundryhttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/yes-im-a-grown-woman-who-pays-my-mom-to-do-my-familys-laundryWed, 18 Dec 2024 18:25:21 GMT

In 2020, my mom moved a few hours north of where she raised me to live closer to me and my husband. We knew we wanted children in the coming years, and she wanted to be close to us when the time came. My mom has always said her purpose in life was to be the best mother to her children as she could – and my god has she been – and now that she lives just a two-minute drive from us, she is also the grandma of every kid’s dreams to my son.

My husband and I both have full-time jobs, and after our son was born, we were struggling. We started outsourcing a lot of the domestic tasks we just didn’t have the time for anymore. We got our groceries delivered, hired a cleaner to come once a month, and used a laundry service to pick up and drop off our clothes, freshly washed and neatly folded inside little canvas hampers. We imagined we'd only use these services to get us through that first year of no sleep, but it turns out the demands on two working parents don’t disappear when your baby becomes a toddler.

Then, around the time our kid turned 3, my mom retired. She quickly decided she was not ready to be done working entirely, and somewhere in the process of mulling over her options to make a little money — delivering for Uber Eats, maybe house or dog sitting — I realized I would much rather pay my mom that $15 a load (plus tip) than a stranger on an app.

I think I pitched her the idea, but she says she broached the subject with me first after seeing the laundry app’s branded hampers sitting on my front porch, awaiting pickup. My mom and I are super close, so either way, the conversation wasn’t weird at all, the way money tends to make things with family. What I do know is that I absolutely loathe doing laundry, the chore you have to touch a million times to complete between gathering, sorting, washing, drying, folding, pairing socks, and putting it all away. Mom, on the other hand, simply doesn’t mind it all that much.

However it unfolded, now we’re here, in this wonderful arrangement where I routinely pay my mom to do my laundry. She has been known to refuse my money when she knows I’m paying off a home repair bill, but in general, it makes me really happy to pay her. It feels like an acknowledgement that yes, this is work, just as it has always been work.

For me to fall behind on chores, with a husband who truly shows up at home and only one child, felt a little shameful at first. But Mom doesn’t see it that way.

I drop it off at her house or she takes it with her when she stops by with a treat for my kid, but one way or another, my heaps of laundry make it to her house. It’s usually four loads or so, crammed into the travel hampers left over from our previous service. Mom always brings them back folded, sorted, on hangers, and bless that woman, my husband’s work shirts come home ironed too. (I have told her again and again that’s going above and beyond, but she says she finds ironing meditative. I would rather eat the iron.)

It wasn’t long before, while bitching about keeping up with a family’s worth of laundry, I admitted to my friends that I have wholly given up trying and pay my mom to help instead. They asked if she’d offer her services to them. So now, two of my closest friends — also working moms — have her come over on set days of the week to keep their laundry piles at bay.

I hear from them constantly about how much they appreciate her, organizing their drawers as she goes and sorting out too-small sizes from our toddlers’ wardrobes when she spots them. She has even been known to drop what she’s doing and run a kid’s forgotten lunchbox to school when their mom has a meeting. One friend says my mom has saved their lives. The other has even taken my mom on as a personal assistant, complete with an hourly wage, to help her with all manner of household tasks while she launches her own business.

More than once, my angel mother has teared up talking about how much she enjoys being everyone’s laundry fairy, specifically for us working parents. Her ex-husband, my dad, certainly never deigned to pitch in around the house, meaning my mom worked full-time and did everything for her two daughters. For me to fall behind on chores, with a husband who truly shows up at home and only one child, felt a little shameful at first. But Mom doesn’t see it that way. She says she just doesn't want us to have to do it all like she did. So, it warms her heart to be that help for us now, and it warms mine to pay her for it.

Katie McPherson is the Associate Lifestyle Editor at Romper and Scary Mommy. She loves reading, kickboxing, horseback riding, and rotting on the couch after a long day. She married her college sweetheart, and now they have one son, a very large dog, and achey joints.

]]><![CDATA[Eboni K. Williams On New Baby, Single Parenting & Repping Black Moms]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/entertainment/eboni-k-williams-baby-daughter-libertyhttps://www.scarymommy.com/entertainment/eboni-k-williams-baby-daughter-libertyWed, 18 Dec 2024 17:40:08 GMT

Eboni K. Williams doesn’t give a damn about rules. She never has. She played by her own rules when she finished high school at age 16 and became a first-generation college graduate. She played by her own rules when she left her stable law career to pursue TV journalism. And when she took a job at Fox News, despite disagreeing with some of the network’s politics. And when she joined Bravo’s The Real Housewives of New York City, becoming the first Black cast member on the series.

“Beating odds, beating statistics — shattering stereotypes has always been very important to me,” she says. So when she decided to become a mom, of course she had to do it her way, on her timeline. And as she embarked on single parenthood, she noticed she wasn’t the only Black woman publicly modeling how to have kids on your own terms, either.

There’s her fellow Housewives alum Candiace Dillard Bassett, who opened up about her IVF journey during her time on The Real Housewives of Potomac — a reminder that fertility journeys can look different for everyone. There’s singer Ashanti, who married rapper Nelly while pregnant with their first child — proof that you can check off life’s milestones (or not!) in whatever order you please. And there’s countless other women, from Gabrielle Union to Kandi Burruss to Naomi Campbell, who have expanded their families through stepparenting and surrogacy — exemplifying how becoming a mother doesn’t have to look a certain way.

Now, by sharing her life with baby Liberty, born in August, Williams wants to add to the possibilities for women like her. “Part of my intention with everything I do, but especially this part of my life and this journey, is to challenge social and cultural norms as they relate to Black women, Black mothers, and single Black mothers,” she says. “Those are three constructs that I hold with fragility. I don’t by any stretch think that I am singular in my ability to take on this work. But I do see myself as positioned well to challenge how those things are seen and how they will be seen going forward.”

“I know me well, and I don’t like group projects. I enjoy the freedom of being the executive decision maker.”

Williams and I are chatting via Zoom on Election Day. We’re waiting to find out whether this country would choose to be led by someone who looks like us — even though we pretty much already knew the answer. Yet despite the weight of the political atmosphere, the conversation flows easily. We finish each other’s sentences and laugh heartily in a way that feels familial. In addition to both being girl moms, we learn we’re both members of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority Inc., the historically Black Greek organization that counts Vice President Kamala Harris as one of its own, too. Williams is even wearing pink and green, the sorority’s colors; Liberty is strapped to her chest, sleeping peacefully. I ask with the sincerity of one mom to another: How are you?

“All — with a little asterisk — is well,” she says.

The 41-year-old is at the tail end of the fourth trimester, and she’s still getting used to her new identity as a parent. “I was never one of those girls or women who always had a motherhood fantasy,” she says, in the strong, steady voice of someone who was born to be on TV. Her professional identity came more naturally. She froze her eggs at age 34, but not because she was seriously thinking about having children with her then-partner, or even having children at all. “I did that as a flex,” she says, laughing. “This was not very different for me than buying a Birkin bag. It was a power move.” The power of saying: I have options.

But something shifted for Williams during the pandemic. She’d already been married and divorced once, and in August 2020, she ended her engagement to businessman Steven Glenn. Meanwhile, with her therapist’s encouragement, she tracked down her biological father; the two had a 10-minute conversation, in which he acknowledged paternity but requested no further relationship. For many women, and for even more Black women, these circumstances — the lack of a partner, fractured family relationships — would steer them away from parenthood. For Williams, they pulled her toward it. About 18 months later, she decided to pursue conceiving a child via in vitro fertilization.

“I really am a moth drawn to a fire.”

It started with discovering a group on social media called Single Mothers by Choice. “It didn’t occur to me,” she says. “Like most, when I heard ‘single mom,’ I thought tragic. I thought poverty. I thought, ‘Your child will end up in jail and a menace to society.’” But the more she researched, the more having a child on her own not only presented itself as a potential option, it became the preferred option. “I know me well, and I don’t like group projects,” she says with a laugh. “I enjoy the responsibility and the freedom of being the executive decision maker. I kind of need to have full authority and move how I see best.”

This comes as no surprise to friends like Natalie Robinson, an AKA soror who’s known Williams for a decade and has been by her side on her path to motherhood. “Eboni is the ultimate risk-taker and go-getter — someone who’s always thinking ahead, full of ideas, and ready to dive in. I can always count on her to pull up her Notes app and share her next big plan,” Robinson says. “If she’s thinking about something, she’s probably already made up her mind, but she still values my perspective and wants to hear my thoughts.”

Williams was also inspired by the way women in the group weren’t closing the door on love. So many Black women have been told both by their mothers and the media that they have to choose their priorities — like marriage or career. But the group made it clear that having a child on her own didn’t mean she had to give up on finding a partner. Says Williams: “This was this wild-card scenario that said, ‘What if I told you you could get the financial [stability], and you could still get the motherhood piece, and it doesn’t mean you’re totally erasing the possibility of the love story?’”

In a way, her choice to move forward with the process wasn’t dissimilar to other big life decisions she’s made, whether taking a job at Fox News or becoming a Housewife.

“I really am a moth drawn to a fire,” she says. “I felt called to do the work of redefining that, of disrupting that. I saw this choice as consistent with my calling — to do the thing I’m not supposed to do.”

IVF can feel like a game of roulette, and it worked for Williams on her first try: Of the 10 eggs retrieved, one resulted in a healthy embryo, with one successful transfer resulting in conception. “I personally take issue with high-profile celebrities that use their platform to tell half of their fertility story,” she says. “That’s one reason why I’m so transparent. We need to be honest about the likelihood, and we need to be honest about the complications.”

Williams administered the shots to herself — when it comes to pain, as she puts it, “I ain’t no punk” — and had it not been for her college bestie who insisted on staying in town, she would’ve labored and given birth alone, by choice. She was comfortable with the care team she assembled; her OB-GYN and doula were both Black women. But she was still mindful of any medical intervention that she felt might have been more in the hospital’s best interest than in hers or her daughter’s. After Williams was induced and 45 hours of labor, Liberty Alexandria Williams was born on Aug. 13.

“I [froze my eggs] as a flex. This was not very different for me than buying a Birkin bag. It was a power move.”

Williams shared the significance of Liberty’s name in an Instagram post, recounting the origin of the Statue of Liberty as a tribute to formerly enslaved Black Americans. She tells me the name is an invitation to her daughter to live an unrestricted life, to exercise the freedom bestowed upon her. “I brought her into a world where she is free,” she says. “Her ability to remain free will be her work.”

The transition to motherhood hasn’t come without challenges. Williams acknowledges that she’s struggling with some postpartum body changes. “But I know enough and have lived long enough to know if that is one of my top challenges, I am abundantly blessed,” she says laughing. She hired a night nurse to help out five days a week and — despite her no-group-projects mentality — has leaned on her inner circle. “What’s truly special is her trust in her village,” Robinson says. “She’s not overbearing but instead embraces the support around her, knowing it takes a community to raise a child. Watching her in this role has been nothing short of inspiring.”

The biggest adjustment for Williams, though, has been a new sense of self. Growing up, Williams watched her grandmother Katie care for white children while Williams’ mother worked and built her business. “Caregiver” and “breadwinner” were separate jobs — and Williams, as a Black woman who has worked to sit at tables where women before her couldn’t, is still learning how to integrate both. “God forced me to encounter this identity conflict and crisis,” she says. “[I’ve] done the thing that I wanted to do on my terms, which is like the ultimate boss move on one level. And on the other level, I still somehow someway ended up as the help. And it was really, really hard for me the first several weeks.”

Williams found solace in one of her favorite movies: Gone with the Wind. She closely watched Hattie McDaniel’s Mammy character — the role McDaniel made history with, becoming the first Black actor to win an Oscar. “I really started to unpack the narrative that although she was the ultimate help, Mammy was also the biggest boss in the house,” Williams says. “She was the one that was most in control and most in charge.”

More changes are in store. Liberty will soon be in a language-immersion day care three days a week. Williams put her Harlem home up for sale this summer. (As if moving in New York City isn’t hard enough without a newborn.) It’s a whole new season of Eboni, and she’s greeting it with open arms. Her life didn’t need to look a certain way to become a mom — why start following the rules now? She can date without the burden of finding a co-parent; she can mix parenting life and her professional life in ways she hasn’t even seen yet. Liberty has, in fact, liberated her mother.

“I don’t want to inadvertently limit who I get to be,” she says. “I’m wide open to the element of surprise. Let God surprise me. Show me something!”

]]><![CDATA[My Kids Have A Different Last Name Than Me. Do I Need Special Travel Documentation For Flying?]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/my-kids-have-a-different-last-name-than-me-do-i-need-special-travel-documentation-for-flyinghttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/my-kids-have-a-different-last-name-than-me-do-i-need-special-travel-documentation-for-flyingWed, 18 Dec 2024 17:32:58 GMT
Hinterhaus Productions/DigitalVision/Getty Images

Whether you and your partner aren’t married but share kids, or you’ve remarried and each brought your own children into a blended family, or a whole host of other reasons, it’s not uncommon these days for parents to have a different last name than their kids. Generally speaking it’s no big deal, but if you’ve never flown with them before, you’re probably wondering: Can I travel if my child has a different last name than me, either domestic or international?

You totally can, according to family law experts, but you’ll want to bring some extra documentation along just to be safe.

International flights

In a blog post on her firm’s website, family law expert Siobhan Jeffels says traveling internationally is where you’re most likely to be questioned about having a different last name than your kid. This is because there are tighter security measures in place to prevent child trafficking. In addition to your kid’s passport, she recommends that parents bring:

  • Your child’s birth certificate. This will list the full names of both parents and the child, and the child’s information will match their passport’s.
  • Adoption documentation that proves you are your child’s legal guardian.
  • Your marriage certificate. If your name has changed since your child’s birth and won’t match what’s on their birth certificate, traveling with your marriage certificate or change of name paperwork can explain that difference to officials.
  • A child travel consent. If you’re traveling solo with your child internationally, regardless of whether your last names are the same, you’ll need a child travel consent to prove their other legal parent is OK with them leaving the country. But it might be especially important for parents whose last name differs from their kid’s — this will raise a flag for officials anyway — so it’s extra good to have. (You may not need one if you have sole custody of your child, but maybe bring that court order along to be safe.)

It’s also a good idea to warn your child that border officials may also ask them questions, and that it shouldn’t scare them or make them nervous. Encourage them to answer clearly and honestly and all will be well.

Lastly, you can check the U.S. Department of State’s Bureau of Consular Affairs website to find out what documents officials will want to see when you arrive and depart other countries. Just click into the travel advisory for your destination, visit its country information page, and scroll down to “Entry, Exit, and Visa Requirements.”

Domestic flights

There aren’t as many required documents when traveling within the U.S. Federal law doesn’t require anyone under 18 to show government ID to fly, but some airlines will have their own rules, so check with them about what documents they’ll want to see, says Rocket Lawyer. In most cases a birth certificate will do nicely — it’s proof of age, full name, and your parenthood all in one.

If you don’t share a last name with your child, a child travel consent is good to have, according to the same law experts. It should include the child’s name, travel companion’s name, travel dates, destination, and a statement of permission from the parent or parents (if the person taking the child is a grandparent or other adult). Then, sign it in front of a notary to make it official. You might not get asked for it when flying within the country, but if you are, you’ll be really glad you have it.

All in all, traveling with a child whose last name is different than yours is not the biggest deal in the world, as long as you do your research beforehand. After all, nobody wants to get told at customs that they have to turn around and go home for a birth certificate.

]]><![CDATA[Woman's Video Flipping The Holiday Roles Goes Viral]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/flipping-holiday-roleshttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/flipping-holiday-rolesWed, 18 Dec 2024 17:24:33 GMT
@clarabellecwb / TikTok

The holidays tend to let that weaponized incompetence from partners shine. There’s so much going on — school spirit week, Christmas card orders, last-minute trips to urgent care — that default parents have about ten mental breakdowns before Christmas Eve.

This mental load tends to land on moms, aka the default parent. So, what would happen if the roles were reversed, and moms were the ones just living life as normal and lending no help at all to make things run smoothly?

Clare, @clarabellecwb on TikTok, created yet another hilarious satire video where she flips the holiday load, acting like a mom who uses weaponized incompetence like it’s their job.

In the video, she gives all-too-familiar conversations that so many of us have had with partners who just cannot get it together.

“Sorry. Did you get gifts for my parents? Did you get gifts for my sisters? Did you get gifts for my work client?” she asks.

In another clip, she takes on a partner gaslighting their spouse into thinking that they are the problem when it comes to the stressors of the holiday season.

“You're like, running around, and it's stressing everybody out. Just relax,” she says.

She then moves onto the “Ask daddy” portion of the video, aiming all those dads who punt the ball to their partner AKA mom.

“Ask daddy. Mommy doesn't know what Elf on the Shelf is. Ask daddy. Mommy doesn't know anything about a holiday concert at school. Teacher gifts? Ask daddy. Mommy doesn't get school emails,” she says before asking her imaginary spouse if they got her holiday dress dry-cleaned.

Seriously, can you ever imagine asking your partner that? If you can, kudos!

Clare then channels her inner-grumpy spouse who won’t participate in the cheesy fun of matching holiday pajamas.

“I'm not wearing matching pajamas. I tell you this every year, matching pajamas are defeminating,” she jokes before asking her spouse to “just make another turkey” after springing the news on her husband that her four sisters were coming for Christmas dinner.

Then, the final blow, the classic nothing-in-the-stocking trop.

“Daddy's stocking isn’t empty. It's full of love. Yes, because daddy loves taking care of all of us. You didn't tell me you wanted anything for Christmas. No, I'm not a mind reader. You got to communicate,” she says.

After her video went viral, several default moms chimed in with their own frustrations.

“He’s trying to do better this year, so now not only do I have to do Christmas, I have to train a Christmas intern,” one user joked.

“You forgot the tantrum about family pictures,” another said.

“Omg this was so triggering and I have a 50/50 husband 😂,” another noted.

]]><![CDATA[I'm Putting "From Mom" On My Kids' Christmas Presents This Year]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/from-mom-christmas-presentshttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/from-mom-christmas-presentsWed, 18 Dec 2024 17:16:03 GMT
AleksandarNakic/E+/Getty Images

It started when I was a kid. After my siblings and I stopped believing in Santa, our Christmas presents would be labeled, “From Mom & Dad” — in my mom’s handwriting, of course. And while I was pretty aware that my mom was fully in charge of the Christmas magic in my house growing up, I didn’t really understand the sheer amount of labor that went into that job until I was a parent myself.

That’s how, 25 years later, I found myself writing “From Mom & Dad” on my tweens’ presents even when I was the person who made the list, checked it twice, found the deals, paid for the gifts, hid them in the garage, wrapped them, and put them under the tree.

I was also in charge of Christmas dinner, the cookie platters, the tree, the lights, and on and on and on. Sure, we didn’t have to go all out during the holidays, and yes, I created some of the stress myself, but I also remembered how amazing Christmas felt in my house growing up, and I wanted that for my kids, too.

When I asked my husband for help, he simply said whatever I wanted to do “wasn’t necessary.” If I wanted to do it, he said, I could. But he’d rather go without the holiday magic than lend a hand (but really — did he just know that I would do it if he wouldn’t, and I never called his bluff?)

And that’s how the holidays went for years. I put on the show, I filled my own stocking, I took on the vast majority of the mental load and invisible labor. And when the kids opened their presents, they gave both of their parents a hug, because they thought the gifts were from both of us.

Everything changed when we got divorced a few years ago — but perhaps not as quickly as you might guess. Even though we lived separately, we still celebrated holidays together as a family. And despite my best intentions, I was still writing “From Mom & Dad” on my kids’ presents. Why? Because I didn’t want my children to feel like their dad didn’t care about them. I was protecting them from the truth: that their dad, for whatever reason, didn’t put effort into making the holidays merry and bright.

I know there are probably complicated reasons that my co-parent (and, let’s face it, a lot of male partners) doesn’t buy and wrap gifts. I absolutely think boys are socialized to not think of others and to not show affection from the time that they are born. I also think they were just not taught the skills of gift-giving like girls are. I remember sitting down with my mom and learning how to wrap and decorate presents correctly — neither of my long-term male partners have known how to wrap at all. My ex-husband doesn’t even really think of who should get presents and when; for example, he would never think to send a holiday present in to the teacher. It is simply not on their radar.

Of course, this doesn’t mean that men who haven’t stepped up can’t learn and do better. They should be able to recognize that they are not pulling their weight and that their partners are taking on a huge amount of stress and responsibility — oftentimes not just for their kids, but for their husbands’ family, too. They need to take action. They need to just sit down and take 10 minutes to learn how to wrap a freaking present. Look up a YouTube video, it’s not hard.

So, last night, as I was wrapping my kids’ Christmas presents (and watching the BBC version of Pride & Prejudice, while I will argue is absolutely a Christmas movie), I decided this was the year to sign the tags honestly. For the first time, my kids will know who their presents are from. And it’s not their dad. It will be written big and loud and clear: FROM MOM.

]]><![CDATA[8 Easy Cucumber Salad Recipes, Because That One Tik Tok Guy Got You Hooked]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/8-cucumber-salad-recipes-because-that-one-tik-tok-guy-got-you-hookedhttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/8-cucumber-salad-recipes-because-that-one-tik-tok-guy-got-you-hookedWed, 18 Dec 2024 16:57:57 GMT

When it comes to food trends of 2024, the dense bean salad took off because it was truly functional. They’re all about no- or minimal-cooking-required recipes you can prep in one big batch, and that actually get better as their flavors marry throughout the week. Just as dense bean salads had their moment on Tik Tok this year, so too did cucumber salad recipes, all thanks to charismatic Tik Tok creator Logan Moffitt, a.k.a. that cucumber guy.

Moffitt first went viral for his assertion that “sometimes you need to eat an entire cucumber,” and then showing us how to make them extra delicious. Since then he has given us no shortage of cucumber salad recipes, from yogurt-y ones with dill to salmon avocado cucumber salad, and even poking fun at himself along the way. His recipes are great if you’re looking to get more vegetables or hydration into your diet in an easy way that’s low on dirty dishes when you’re done (love).

Of course, Moffitt isn’t the only person who appreciates the humble cucumber or knows how to make it more flavorful. With that in mind, we’ve rounded up some cucumber salad recipes from around the web to add to your work lunches, eat for a savory snack, or whip up at midnight when you simply can’t go back to sleep without eating something covered in chili crunch.

Korean Cucumber Salad

I love Tik Tok creator Cassie Yeung’s tutorials on making delicious dishes from numerous different Asian cultures, and her Korean cucumber salad is something I remake for myself again and again. The accordion cut cucumbers hold on to all that sauce and spice but maintain their crunch even after a few days sitting in their sauce in the fridge.

Sushi Cucumber Salad

Tik Toker Mayra Wendolyne touts her recipe as part of her weight loss journey, but regardless of your goals, this salad looks both delicious and nutrient-dense. A little air-fried salmon, edamame, and cream cheese make this one seem like a good high-protein lunch too.

Greek Cucumber Salad

Jessica In The Kitchen

Jessica In The Kitchen’s recipe will teach you how to make a classic, flavorful Greek salad in about 20 minutes. Plus, it’s a great reminder that any of these cucumber recipes would be so tasty over top of a bed of your favorite grains.

Creamy Cucumber Salad

Budget Bytes

Ranch lovers, you’re going to like these creamy cukes from Budget Bytes a whole lot. They’re dressed in a tangy sour cream dressing (could be swapped for Greek yogurt) seasoned with onion, dill, and lemon. Once you perfect your version, this would also make a delicious summer barbecue side dish.

Everything Bagel Cucumbers

OK back to Logan real quick: cucumbers with red onion, avocado, salmon, and whipped chive cream cheese does not sound bad at all. Add capers, fresh dill, and everything but the bagel seasoning and shake vigorously for what is essentially a brunch salad, IMO.

A High-Protein Cucumber Salad Recipe

Creator Myriam Estrella takes inspiration from Logan Moffitt’s cucumber recipes but makes her rendition super high in protein. The 78 grams listed on the screen is for two servings, but still, getting nearly 40 grams from a salad is not half bad. Just be warned: this one involves cottage cheese, which isn’t for everyone, but if you like it, you’ll love this.

Cucumber & Pepper Salad

Rachael Kirkconnell is known from her time on The Bachelor, and now for making food videos on Tik Tok — with this salad being one of her most viral posts. It’s got crunchy cukes and sweet peppers topped with chili crunch (spice), ginger dressing (sweetness), and everything but the bagel seasoning (saltiness).

Pepino Salad

Healthier Steps

This recipe from Healthier Steps keeps the salad pretty simple, tossing together sliced cucumbers and red onion and dressing them up with lemon juice, oil, fresh ginger, and just a dash of maple syrup. It’s simple and fast, and sometimes that’s really all you need.

So, which cucumber salad are you whipping up this week?

]]><![CDATA[FDA Issues A Black Box Warning For A Popular Menopause Drug]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/veozah-black-box-warning-menopausehttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/veozah-black-box-warning-menopauseWed, 18 Dec 2024 16:13:44 GMT
Veozah

The symptoms of menopause can have a significant affect on your life, from mood swings to painful periods to joint pain to weight gain. One of the most notorious issues is hot flashes, which can strike at any time. While the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) approved a new drug to fight this occurrence in May 2023, they’ve now placed a Black Box warning on the label due to a rare risk of serious liver damage.

On Monday, December 16, the FDA issued their most prominent and serious warning, a Boxed Warning, for Veozah (fezolinetant), to highlight the rare or documented risk of liver damage.

What should those who are taking the menopause medication do in response to this news? As always, first and foremost, talk to your doctor about your personalized care. Secondly, the FDA suggests that those on Veozah get regular blood tests to check for signs of liver damage. Specifically, the FDA now recommends testing for two months after starting Veozah, and then at months three, six, and nine of treatment.

In addition the FDA states that people showing evidence of liver damage should stop the medication immediately: “If there are signs and symptoms suggesting liver injury, stopping the medicine could prevent worsening liver injury and potentially return liver function to normal.”

Symptoms of liver damage can include:

  • Fatigue
  • Nausea
  • Vomiting
  • Unusual itching
  • Light-colored stools
  • yellowing of the eyes or skin (jaundice)
  • Dark urine
  • Abdominal swelling
  • Pain in the right upper abdomen

The decision was made after an incident occurred in a specific patient.

“We made this update after reviewing a postmarketing report of a patient with elevated liver blood test values and signs and symptoms of liver injury after taking the medicine for about 40 days,” the FDA wrote on its website.

Astellas, the drug’s manufacturer, released a statement about their drug, encouraging patients to be aware of side-effects and the updated recommended liver testing.

“It is important to note that the overall benefit-risk of Veozah has not changed and remains positive,” said Astellas Communications Director Sarah Jacobson, “but we want to further ensure that patents and health care providers are aware of the potential side effects of Veozah, and the hepatic laboratory testing, as it relates to its benefit to help reduce moderate to severe vasomotor symptoms due to menopause.”

Veozah is a non-hormonal menopause drug that blocks the NK3 receptor, which helps control the body’s temperature. This restores a balance between estrogen levels and the brain chemical neurokinin B.

You can read the full Boxed Warning announcement here.

]]><![CDATA[Are You From A Present Family Or A Non-Present Family?]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/present-family-vs-non-present-familyhttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/present-family-vs-non-present-familyWed, 18 Dec 2024 15:32:25 GMT
Absolutely Not Productions / TikTok

My sister married into a “present family.” She and I come from a family that isn’t so into the whole gift-giving thing, so she was totally caught off guard when the gift-giving experience became an Olympic sport as she entered into this new world with her partner’s family. We do Secret Santa! One gift. Fifty dollar budget. Done and done.

So, what exactly is a present family?

What is a present family?

Podcaster and comedian, Heather McMahan, shared her own experience on her podcast, Absolutely Not, joking about how bizarre it feels to enter a high-present family from the other side.

“We're not a present family, I get it. But man, when you ... just wait till you get older and maybe marry into a present family, it is bizarre,” Heather explained to her guest, Logan Crosby. “Some people only show affection through materialistic things, and it is a wild thing to experience.”

Logan responds, “Yeah, that's just, and I mean, maybe one day, look, if I'm married into a family that they wanna buy me...”

Heather then cuts him off and jokes, “Wait a minute, look, let me just say, I've never received the gift. I have not received a gift.”

The two bust out in a huge fit of laughter.

Present families are in a league of their own, and as Heather said, sadly, it’s kind of a way for emotionally stunted families to show they care. In summary, you buy gifts for every single member of the family — parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, nieces, nephews, etc. Literally every member! And then on the day they all get together, everyone goes around and opens their gifts. It takes hours.

What is a non-present family?

After the clip circulated, TikTok users weighed in on the difference between a present family and a non-present family, debating which one is better.

“I had no idea there were non-present families,” one user said.

“I come from a huge present family. Married into a low present family. It feels cheap,” another noted.

Another said, “Noooo I love buying gifts! It’s not bc materialistic things = affection but buying something bc you know someone so well is really special. And you absolutely would get gifts in our fam”

One TikToker admitted, “I was raised in a no present family and married into a present family. It definitely makes me so uncomfortable being showered with gifts. I feel like It's transactional like I owe them something 😭”

“Non-present giving family here. Present families make me so overstimulated 😂,” another said.

One user questioned, “Is a no present family zero presents for real???”

One user responded, “My family does experiences vs presents, so you get gifted like tickets or a vacation or something”

“My wife and I are zero presents for each other throughout the year. We do get some stuff for Christmas so the kids don’t see us with nothing. But overall not a gift giving couple,” another replied.

Guess the debate is still up for which is better when it comes to gift-giving around the holidays!

]]><![CDATA[Planning A Holiday Date Night? Try This]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/planning-a-holiday-date-night-try-thishttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/planning-a-holiday-date-night-try-thisWed, 18 Dec 2024 13:48:10 GMT
ProfessionalStudioImages/E+/Getty Images

If anyone needs to be celebrated in the month of December, it’s the caregivers. Being a mom of two, I understand the pressure we endure during the holiday season. There’s decorating the house, fulfilling Christmas lists, participating in the dreaded school themed dress-up weeks, baking cookies, and wrapping all the gifts.

It’s challenging.

Tiring.

And every caregiver needs a break for one moment to catch their breath, and I have the perfect date night idea to help with that.

First thing is first, find someone to watch those kids if they can’t watch themselves.

Next, plan to have dinner at three different places. Excessive? Maybe, but if you break it down by course, it adds an element of fun rather than just going out to dinner. So ask your partner where they want to go for an appetizer, for the main course, and for dessert.

Once your bellies are full, it’s time for the main event. Now, being a New York Times and USA Today bestselling author, I know the greatest escape is reading a book, which brings me to our date location: a bookstore.

And before you go and say: "we’re not big book people", give it a shot; all it takes is one good book to change your mind. Just one good book to help you escape from reality . . . or even to spice up the relationship.

So here is the plan. You might have seen this on all over social media, but I think it’s a great date idea for any bookworm or for someone to get into reading. Give your partner five minutes to peruse the store and look at books. When the five minutes are up, bring them to the front of the store and give them two minutes to grab as many books as they can hold.

Now, there can be variations to this task. You can limit the number of books, you can offer them a basket and tell them to go wild, you can even make a game out of it and they pick a book for you, you pick a book for them. Either way, have fun with it.

And when you’re all done, it’s time to chat about them. If you’re at a bookstore with a coffee shop attached, grab a cuppa, sit down, and chat about what they’re excited to read the books they chose. You might even surprise yourself and join in on the fun. Either way, I hope it’s a fun way to show your partner you appreciate them and to maybe spice things up in your relationship.

And if you’re looking for that added spice with some humor as well, might I suggest something to get you into the holiday spirit like How My Neighbor Stole Christmas, by yours truly. And if you’re not in the holiday spirit, try Bridesmaid by Chance or even A Not So Meet Cute.

Good luck, and happy holidays!

Meghan Quinn

Meghan Quinn is a USA Today & New York Times Bestselling author, wife, adoptive mother, and peanut butter lover. She’s the author of romantic comedies and contemporary romance, bringing readers the perfect combination of heart, humor, and heat in every book. You can find her on Instagram at @meghanquinnbooks.

]]><![CDATA[5 Joyful Black Christmas Movies That Should Be On Your Holiday Radar]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/entertainment/black-christmas-movieshttps://www.scarymommy.com/entertainment/black-christmas-moviesWed, 18 Dec 2024 11:00:24 GMT

It's that time of year again! Those who celebrate Christmas are decking the halls, searching for the perfect gifts, and hopefully getting together with loved ones to share in the Christmas festivities. Once the Halloween skeletons are put away and the sugar high has worn off, lots of us take to binge-watching holiday movies as we wrap presents or bake sugary treats. Once November hits, you'd be hard-pressed to turn on the TV and not find a film telling you the importance of keeping the Christmas spirit in your heart.

Alas, the majority of those movies are showcasing white faces and families. When you Google "Christmas movies," the first page of suggestions is filled with faces and stories that don't offer much diversity. For Black families, finding a film that reflects our own experiences and traditions can be difficult. But films featuring Black casts and Black directors do exist, and plenty of them. They just don't seem to get the spotlight they deserve.

So, just to get you started, here are five Christmas films celebrating Black joy that you can stream this month. I emphasize the joy part because when telling Black stories, even the Christmas ones, Hollywood seems to lean more towards trauma and suffering — and let's try to keep things as light as possible, shall we?

The Preacher’s Wife (1996)

This remake of the 1947 Cary Grant classic The Bishop's Wife can be categorized as a classic itself. Denzel Washington, Whitney Houston, and Courtney B. Vance all bring elegance and charm to this film. Washington plays Dudley, an angel sent to Earth to help Reverend Biggs (Vance) rekindle the romance with his wife, Julia (Houston). But things become a bit complicated when Dudley starts to have feelings for the preacher's wife. This Christmas tale gives us a lighthearted and comedic Washington, something we don't get often enough. We're treated to the soulful voice of the late Houston singing gospel songs that go back to her vocal beginnings and bring many of us right back to Christmas church service. Once the credits roll, you're left with a warm feeling that everything is gonna be OK.

This Christmas (2007)

The Whitfields are all getting together for the first time in four years. The overall vibe? All six siblings are trying to keep something from their mother, Ma’dear (Loretta Devine). Hollywood veterans Devine and Delroy Lindo anchor an equally talented cast that includes Idris Elba, Regina King, Mekhi Phifer, and Lauren London. This film is a wonderfully realistic representation of Black family gatherings, best expressed by the Soul Train line, which inevitably shows up in the living room once the food has been digested. The film’s title comes from the 1970 R&B classic Christmas tune, This Christmas, by Donny Hathaway. Much like the song, this movie elicits a feeling of extreme Christmas magic and possibility.

The Holiday Calendar (2018)

A young photographer, Abby (Kat Graham), inherits an advent calendar from her grandmother. Simple enough... except this calendar seemingly predicts the future. Every day on the calendar that Abby opens has a clue to life-changing events to come. And what’s a Christmas movie without a surprise love interest? Graham and Quincy Brown are so cute as longtime best friends reunited for the holidays that the audience will find themselves rooting for them to just kiss already! The late Ron Cephas Jones, maybe best known from This Is Us, plays Abby’s loving Gramps, ready to share his wisdom. If you enjoy rom-com hijinks and missed connections, grab your cocoa and settle in because this film delivers.

Jingle Jangle: A Christmas Journey (2020)

Jeronicus (Forest Whitaker) is an eccentric toymaker who has invented an extraordinary toy far beyond the imagination. But his assistant, Gustafson (Keegan-Michael Key), steals the toy and takes all the fame and accolades for himself. This sends Jeronicus into isolation. He even becomes estranged from his family. Where is the joy, you ask? Jeronicus gets a visit from his STEM-loving granddaughter Journey (Madalen Mills), who sets him up with a good dose of Black Girl Magic. You’ll surely want to revisit the uplifting musical numbers and the breathtaking, joyfully colored world created by writer and director David E. Talbert every holiday season.

Christmas Hotel (2019)

Take all of the Lifetime holiday movie tropes you know and love, toss them in a mixer, dollop dough on a cookie sheet, and bake at 350 degrees for 1 hour and 28 minutes. Voila! Now you have a tasty batch of friends-to-enemies-to-lovers Christmas cookies. Erin (Tatyana Ali), a big city hotel manager, returns to her small hometown, Garland Grove, with plans to open a new branch of the chain hotel she works for. Garland Grove is a town that loves Christmas but hates big business. To get the town to accept the new hotel, Erin turns it into an all-year-long Christmas-themed hotel. Erin came into all of this not having time for frivolous holiday spirit, but with the help of her family, friends, and childhood friend-turned-love-interest Connor (Sean Patrick Thomas), she learns the benefits of letting the Christmas joy back into her life. Here is the real concern, though: Is that hotel gonna turn a profit?

Kahmeela Adams-Friedson has been called a "pop culture savant" with particular expertise in all things '80s, '90s, and horror film. After producing and hosting several podcasts dedicated to film and telling stories of women and artists of all mediums, she consistently brings delight and discovery to the art of the interview — just ask Gloria Rueben. Kahmeela has designed a career that allows her to create in multiple areas of media. Her opinions on life, film, and literature can be found on many podcasts, in the Pittsburgh City Paper, Pittsburgh Magazine, Looper, and BUST Magazine, just to name a few.

If you fancy yourself a fan of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, you can listen to her ReVisiting Sunnydale Podcast, where she and her co-host rewatch the cult classic with more mature eyes.

]]><![CDATA[This Is Your Reminder To Do That Huge Annual Purge Before Christmas]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/annual-purge-before-christmashttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/annual-purge-before-christmasTue, 17 Dec 2024 17:25:52 GMT
@mallorysholar / TikTok

I come from a long line of hoarders. Like, you could barely move in my great aunt’s home because you’d run into a giant pile of Time magazines from the 70s. My parents are slightly the same way (mostly my dad) who saved his lunchbox from childhood and every single baseball hat he’s ever procured.

I, on the other hand, want to get rid of everything all the time. I am constantly throwing away my daughter’s knick-knacks (that she doesn’t play with) or selling things on Facebook Marketplace. Clutter overwhelms me. I’m sure my therapist could sort all this out, but in the meantime, one mom on TikTok wants everyone to take a page from this book and get that annual house purge done pronto!

It can be a lot of work at first, but once everything is gone, you’ll feel so free!

“It’s that time of year again. And by that, I mean it's time for me to go into an absolute spiral and purge everything in my house while nobody's looking,” Mallory Sholar joked in her TikTok.

“Because every single year, right before Christmas, I get sent into a complete anxiety-induced tailspin at the thought of all of the stuff that my kids are about to receive and the things that are about to be brought into my house.” Relatable!

She then shows footage of herself loading up her car with all sorts of fun things that are either going to the dump or to a resale shop. She also kills two birds with one stone because, in order to fit all the purged goods in her car, she has to clean it first.

“In order to make room for all of these donations, I gotta take all the junk out of my car that's been living there rent-free,” she notes before getting into her rules for the purge.

“If it has not been worn, if it has not been played with, if it has been sitting around waiting for me to find a place for it and I still have not found a place for it, it is all gone,” she says.

“I don't care if you think that you were gonna wear that jacket that you've had for 12 years, if I haven't seen you wear it in the last year, it's gone. If we have a new and better version of whatever it is, it's also gone.”

One important thing to note about Mallory’s purge: she does most of this behind her family’s back — for good reason! Have you ever tried to purge toys or clothes with kids? Forget about it! That doll or truck or game that they haven’t played with in months is now suddenly their favorite toy once they see it in the donation basket.

“If anybody in my house asks me where anything is, I'm gonna play dumb. So weird you can't find that one thing that you've had zero interest in,” she sarcastically jokes.

“Meanwhile, I feel like I lost 50 pounds.”

TikTok users loved Sholar’s DGAF attitude.

“Yes girl! I’ve already taken 4 bags full and I feel like it doesn’t even look different. Gotta do some more this weekend 😅” one user said.

The OP replied, “I took SO MUCH and immediately got home and thought okay well guess the whole house’s gotta go too 😅😂”

If you don’t know where to start with a good house purge, check out our best toy purge tips here!

]]><![CDATA[A Mom Explains Exactly How She Teaches Her Kids To Respond To An Apology]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/teaching-kids-how-to-accept-apologieshttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/teaching-kids-how-to-accept-apologiesTue, 17 Dec 2024 16:19:31 GMT
TikTok / @hangingformorepodcast

We teach our kids a lot about how to apologize to others. But do we teach them very much about how to accept an apology when someone else is in the wrong? A lot of parents don’t think much about it, and other people of all ages don’t really know the right way to give and receive apologies in the first place.

Over at the Hanging For More Podcast, hosts and best friends Yasmina Elmerkaoui & Maggie Younan discuss everything that’s on their mind. And in a recent episode, Elmerkaoui explained in perfect clarity and succinctness how she teachers her kids to accept an apology.

“I’ve taught my kids to say, ‘Thank you for apologizing,’ rather than, ‘That’s OK,’ because the behavior isn’t OK,” she says plainly. “The apology is welcomed, so it also draws a line and reminds you, no no no, that isn’t OK.”

You’ve got to love the brilliant simplicity and truth in that. And not only is it a good reminder to your kid that they they don’t accept behavior that’s not okay, it also sends a clear message to the person who messed up.

“It reminds everyone else in their life as well that the apology is welcome, but the behavior isn’t OK and I won’t accept it,” she continues.

She adds that she holds them to this response even when she’s the one who’s made the apology.

“They say the same to me, like, ‘Thank you for apologizing,’” she goes on. “I’ll even pull them up if they say, ‘That’s OK.’ Noah, especially, he’s such a mama’s boy, he’s like, ‘Mom that’s okay, you did nothing wrong.’ And I’m like, “No, I did.”

It can’t be easier. “Thank you for apologizing” both allows you to accept the apology but also hold the other person accountable for their actions. Ta-da!

Down in the comments, viewers added some other great tips about apologizing.

“I have mine say ‘apology accepted,’” one mom wrote. “They can also say, ‘apology not accepted’ if they are still upset.”

“There’s power in saying, ‘I forgive you,’ too when you genuinely do, but absolutely never ‘it’s fine,’” said another wise person.

“I’ve taught mine to say ‘Thank you for saying you’re sorry,’” added another parent. “Bad behavior is NOT okay.”

“We were taught in school ‘i accept your apology but please dont do it again,’” another person wrote.

Especially for girls and women, it can be automatic to say, “It’s OK” in order to make the other person feel better. But that’s something we should fight back against, since it can lead to a pattern of bad behavior. Teaching our kids to respond more thoughtfully can break this cycle.

Watch the full episode of Hanging for More here.

]]><![CDATA[A Woman Was Shocked By A Toddler's Behavior At A Movie Theater]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/kid-behaving-badly-movie-theaterhttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/kid-behaving-badly-movie-theaterTue, 17 Dec 2024 16:18:39 GMT
TikTok/@thesam_show

For many parents, catching a matinee showing of an animated Disney movie is a safe space for kids and normal kid behavior. It’s a cartoon, it’s marketed to kids, and it’s during a time when kids are out — adults can go see the later showings if they want total peace and quiet.

But questions still remain for kid movie theater etiquette. What time is late enough to expect that there aren’t toddlers in the theater with you, and what kind of kid behavior is acceptable overall?

One woman on TikTok, @thesam_show, had a crappy theater experience that she blames squarely on the terrible parenting of a toddler. When she got home, she had a rant for the ages about the whole thing.

It all started when she and her fiancé decided to catch an 8 p.m. showing of Moana 2. She said she knew that since she was seeing a Disney movie, there would be kids in the audience acting their age — talking and wiggling — but that one child in particular was behaving terribly.

“I already know that as soon as I say this, I’m going to have parents in my comments being, ‘You don’t understand how hard it is. Just wait until you’re a parent, you’ll see,’” she begins the video. But when I tell you that last night I witnessed some of the most egregious parenting that I have ever seen in my life...”

She said that the theater was a mix of adults and families, but that as the movie started, a family of four sitting near them had a toddler around three or four years old that was not being watched at all.

“He decides to just start walking around the theater,” she says. “He’s looking at his parents to see if they’re going to do anything. And they’re like looking at him and kind of looking at each other like what do we do?”

Apparently, the answer was: not much.

“And I’m sitting there like: you’re the parent,” she continues. “You get up and you make him sit his butt in the chair. They don’t do that. Instead they let their kid run around the theater — I’m no exaggerating.”

Not only was her viewing of the movie interrupted, but she felt bad for the other kids trying to take in the Moana sequel.

“Other children are trying to watch the movie,” she goes on. “This is a special occasion for them, you can tell. And they’re sitting their butts in the chair with their parents and behaving. And this kid is running up and down, he’s going to the front of the theater and then looking back, staring at his mom and waving, ‘Mama, Mama!’”

She added that not only was it distracting, it was dangerous in her eyes.

“You’re letting your child just run around the theater,” she asked. “There were times when they were not watching their child. And so I was watching their child because — he’s going to run out the exit door, he’s going to trip and fall. They’re just completely ignoring their child while he’s making noises and screaming.”

While she doesn’t have kids, she knows what she would have done in their shoes.

“I just want to be clear that if my child ever did that, he would be dragged out of the theater, I don’t care if I spent money on the movie,” she went on. “He would get a stern talking to that he either sits in his seat or we leave.”

As the movie continued, the behavior went on.

“He would come up to his parents and they would feel him popcorn and stuff. They would reward the behavior,” she describes. “And finally they did get him to sit down, but only because they put a cell phone in his hands with YouTube Miss Rachel on. And allowed him to sit in a theater with other people holding the phone up with Miss Rachel on volume.”

She said she tried to be understanding, but this was above and beyond.

“I really want to hold space. I’m sure being a parent is hard. But at the same time: you’re the parent. You’re the one that corrects that behavior. I understand children are going to wiggle in a movie... but I could handle that in five seconds if you let me. Also: supervise your kid. Not only was he being annoying, it was dangerous.

She ended the rant with a plea to parents at the movies: “It was mind blowing. It was terrifying. Please parent your children. For the love of god.”

Down in the comments, the vast majority of people agreed with the poster — the parents should have stepped up and either gotten their kid to behave (without Miss Rachel) or they should have left.

“3 or 4 years old and watching a movie at 8 p.m. is insane,” one person offered in one of the most popular comments.

“I understand that kids have different needs, but parents need to try,” said another.

Even parents with experience said the incident wasn’t forgivable.

“As a mom of 3 kids, I agree,” said one parent. “I let my kids be kids but I also teach them that there are certain situations where we don’t get to act a fool or do what we want to do — and if they can’t, me and the child are leaving.”

“Kids are still learning, but it’s an adult’s job to TEACH them,” another parent added.

A number of people said that they would have gotten the manager to come in and end the situation, since it was dangerous to the kid.

Finally a few people pointed out that kids aren’t the only people who are ruining movies for others.

“Unfortunately, movie theater etiquette is something that adults can’t even grasp, it drives me INSANE,” one person said.

It sounds like the jury has spoken: take your kids to earlier movies, don’t let them run around and make noise, and if you can’t get them under control, it might be time to head home.

]]><![CDATA[Holiday Decor Is Better Than Prozac]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/holiday-decor-is-better-than-prozachttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/holiday-decor-is-better-than-prozacTue, 17 Dec 2024 16:13:31 GMT
Ariela Basson/Scary Mommy; Shutterstock, Stocksy

I’m a little late to the holiday decorating game; a week into December and I am frantically rummaging around my attic to find all the boxes I could have sworn I labeled last year. But it’s not surprising, because with four kids, a dog, a change of season and a few predictable bouts of family sickness, life always feels chaotic and stressful this time of year.

I find myself feeling sluggish and irritable — often overwhelmed with thoughts of the long winter ahead where darkness comes early and my kids are stuck inside for long stretches of time arguing about screen time and toy preferences. But as soon as I make my way down from the attic with the final box, and begin unpackaging each adorably detailed holiday piece, I quickly remember that my mood is about to shift. Because there is one #hottake hill that I am willing to die on and it is that holiday decor is better than Prozac.

Now of course I am not a doctor and I am certainly not trying to diminish any real mental health issues (some of which I have), but I am living proof that a few sequin embellished nutcrackers, some twinkle lights, and a set of iridescent and multicolored tinsel trees can really shift someone’s mood. It just instantly transforms my house from a dark, dreary prison to a happy, sparkly wonderland. I just can’t help but feel a little joyful when I am surrounded by so much color and glitz.

And I am not talking about traditional holiday decor. I mean, I’m not knocking it, but I can’t vouch for its effects. So the greenery, the plaids, the vintage Christmas village scenes and porcine carolers — those might not do it. I’m talking about taking a walk down the bright, loud, sparkly, holiday aisle of Target and filling up the cart. I am talking about accenting the greens and reds with pops of hot pink, lots of metallics, handfuls of glitter, and tinsel — lots of tinsel.

And don’t be afraid to grab a few pieces that require batteries. A few light up signs and an oversized singing snow globe might sound like a headache any other time, but during the month of December it somehow becomes less nails on a chalkboard and more let’s get this party started. And if you don’t believe me, try it.

I dare you to clutter your mantle with holiday accessories and feel angry. I dare you fill a shelf with feathery trees and gold-dusted reindeer and feel pissed off. I mean, if you have kids and are breathing you will definitely feel little bursts of stress and frustration throughout the season but I swear, the decor will lighten the overall mood. I wouldn’t call it science; a Christmas miracle, perhaps.

So this season if you are feeling overwhelmed by the chaos of life and kids and the holidays it’s not too late. You too can give yourself the gift of a little peace and joy by adding a sh*tload of seemingly cheesy but actually incredible holiday decor to your home. Just think, maybe you could save some money on therapy by adding a little sparkle. After all, ‘tis the season to be merry(ish).

Samm is an ex-lawyer and mom of four who swears a lot. Find her on Instagram @sammbdavidson.

]]><![CDATA[Patrick From 'The Family Stone' Is The Ultimate In-Law For The Holidays]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/patrick-family-stonehttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/patrick-family-stoneTue, 17 Dec 2024 15:25:35 GMT
@leastimportantthings / TikTok

We’re very close to being knee-deep in the holiday season, which means a lot of family time. And spending that much time around family, particularly in-laws, can be stressful, exhausting, and at times, traumatic. The holidays are supposed to be a time of giving and love and peace on earth, but, let’s be realistic for a second: that’s very rarely the case.

For some of us, after decades of marriage, we’ve kind of gotten into the groove of safely navigating in-law time without completely losing our minds. For those newer to the in-law game, two podcasters from the Least Important Things podcast have found the perfect model for how to slay the in-law game and come out unscathed: Patrick from The Family Stone.

For context, the holiday film The Family Stone follows the Stone family during the week of Christmas. The entire family is coming home for Christmas, and some are coming with new love interests (much to the matriarch’s chagrin). Patrick, married to the family's youngest brother, Thad, is a veteran in-law, never showing fear and always remaining calm. Patrick, played by actor Brian J. White, is the all-star of the film and what we should all aspire to as far as in-laws go.

“Watch this movie and study Patrick,” podcast host Luke Ferris says.

“It is a master class in being an in-law or being a partner coming to a family's house. Stay into the radar, be supportive, help with the chores.”

Postcast guest Audrey chimes in, “Earn the respect of the matriarch.”

Luke continues, “Patrick knows everything. It's why he's drinking throughout the movie.”

Audrey jokes, “He's the only one who's got that glass of red on him ... He is constantly cooking, constantly cleaning ... Keeping the peace. Being a good sport.”

“Be the Patrick. Be the Patrick. Be the Patrick in your family today,” Luke says.

“Be the Patrick you wish to see in your family,” Audrey reiterates.

Other TikTok users agreed with the podcasters’ take, noting that Patrick truly is the unsung hero of the film.

“Wait — this is a BRILLIANT analysis of his character. I need to learn to fly under the radar, but I love making things about me,” one user joked.

“I need a Patrick POV venting to his family about the Stones… 😂,” another said.

“Love Patrick. He knows what Meredith is walking into so he perfectly balances being Switzerland between the two,” another pointed out.

One user pointed out, “Patrick was such a good partner/son-in-law. And outside of awkward scene where they were playing charades, I appreciated that he and Thad weren’t othered. They integrated their relationship dynamics.”

“I love Patrick!! The scene when he’s closing up the kitchen and turning out the lights always reminds me of my sweet husband,” one user noted.

Time to go do my annual rewatch of The Family Stone and this time, really take notes on Patrick’s every move!

]]><![CDATA[Sorry Not Sorry, I'm Getting You The Same Christmas Gift I Got You Last Year]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/repeat-gifting-christmashttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/repeat-gifting-christmasTue, 17 Dec 2024 11:00:24 GMT
The Good Brigade/Getty Images

Are you still loving your coffee-of-the-month subscription? Great news! I'm getting it for you again this year. Yep, I'm a repeat gifter — and no, I'm not ashamed. On the contrary, I think it's time we all took some of the pressure off our gift-giving, and in that sense, repeat gifting has been the real gift for me.

I can't take full credit for this revelation. I have my sister-in-law to thank for the ultimate Christmas gift that keeps on giving: a six-pack of Jeni's ice cream, in drool-worthy flavors like Brambleberry Crisp and Maple-Soaked Pancakes. Among a sea of orange Shutterfly boxes in our apartment lobby, zooming in on a different orange box — one with the words "ice cream inside" on it — made me feel like I had won the post office lottery. Ice cream! In the mail!

Before my husband and I even set down our spoons, we'd already started thinking about who we could gift this experience to next. Or really, who wouldn't be receiving this from us at some point. Ice cream was so much more fun to unbox than 90% of other gifts. Nothing to assemble. Nothing to return for a different size. Nothing to make space for, except temporarily in the freezer.

And the best part? We could do it all again next year.

So, for the past five years, members of my family have come to expect their own box of fancy ice cream over the holidays. And I'll be honest, I love it. It makes my job so much easier. In fact, my parents and in-laws now have it in their gift rotation, too, and it's actually been a lot of fun to see this trend grow. After all, 'tis the season for giving, sharing joy, all that stuff.

My brain — and I bet yours, too — is the consistency of figgy pudding around the holidays, which leaves exactly zero space for me to guess what you want this year unless you tell me. Feel free to tell me. Because, otherwise, I'm going back to the greatest hits. It's time we normalize the gift of gift repeats. It's not regifting (which is also fine) — it's re-giving.

In one way, it's even more thoughtful than trying something new — you remembered something they liked and wanted them to experience it again.

Our go-to is ice cream, but there are many ways to go about repeat giving. Re-upping a coffee/book/beer/whatever of the month subscription takes away any anxiety your loved one has about going back to "before times" when such a subscription was not a staple in their lives. Did Mom love last year's charm bracelet? Great, you can now buy her new charms every year. How about another year of your recipient's favorite streaming service? They'll probably have to renew it anyway; you might as well save them the step. See, your shopping list came pre-written! Hell, you could even spin it as "tradition," and who doesn't love tradition around the holidays?

Maybe it's just me, but I love a practical gift — something I was planning to buy anyway but now don't have to. It's not just about receiving a gift; it's also about receiving the gift of time. Growing up, our stockings were stuffed with the essentials that saved everyone a trip to the drugstore: gum, lip balm, magazines, the like. Then there was the year I asked my brother for a CVS gift card for Christmas (still one of my best asks, IMHO). It may not be the most exciting present to wake up to, but you bet it'll be put to good use. No complaints if that shows up in my stocking again.

So much pressure is put on us moms to outdo ourselves year after year. But here's a low-hanging fruit to grab: Just get people what's worked before. In one way, it's even more thoughtful than trying something new — you remembered something they liked and wanted them to experience it again. There isn't much that beats the satisfaction of getting someone the perfect gift, regardless of whether they've gotten it before.

Admittedly, it's harder with the kiddos. Each holiday season brings its new, updated wish list. So this might be a later-in-life thing for them, and that's understandable. (I can't be the only one who remembers opening presents of yore and groaning, "Ugh, more clothes?!") With other relatives taken care of, I blessedly have a few more minutes to browse Amazon solely for toys, just the way baby Jesus intended.

So, please feel free to join me in re-giving this holiday season. There's truly no need to reinvent the wheel. Give the people what they want... even if it's what you got them last year.

When she is not practicing drums or folding sweatpants, Meredith Begley likes to read and write about health. Find her on Instagram @meredithbegley.

]]><![CDATA[Mom Tells Other Parents Not To Post School Holiday Performances]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/is-it-okay-to-post-school-holiday-concerts-onlinehttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/is-it-okay-to-post-school-holiday-concerts-onlineTue, 17 Dec 2024 00:23:59 GMT

A group of school children singing nondenominational holiday tunes while dressed in red and green might not seem very interesting, but when your child is among them, it suddenly becomes very special. So special, in fact, that you often record it for all of eternity — and send that recording to friends and relatives.

But while recording holiday performances and school plays is pretty common, controversy enters the chat when these videos are put online. Is it rude to put a kid performance on social media? Is it okay if there are dozens of other children in the video, who are unnamed but may still be recognizable?

One mom on TikTok wants you to know that she doesn’t appreciate it at all. Sarah, who runs the popular TikTok channel @mom.uncharted, thinks that it’s a clear privacy issue and wants none of it.

“If you are at your child’s Christmas concert this year, that’s great. Film, take pictures, have a great time. But don’t upload the footage publicly online. Not all of us want our children circulating on the internet. Not all of us want strangers knowing where they go to school. It’s an issue of privacy and consent. So just don’t do it. Thanks.”

She adds in the caption, “Send to Grandma via text or email — not publicly on social media.”

Down in the comments, viewers had thoughts — and the vast majority agreed with the sentiment.

“It's shocking that people need to be told this,” one person wrote.

Many people added that their schools have specific instructions or policies about not sharing video.

“At my son’s school if you share without blurring faces you will not be allowed to come to another concert,” one mom shared.

“My son's principal gave us very strict instructions to not put photos on social media 🥰 in the sweetest, but sternest way and I really appreciated it,” another commented.

One mom shared the super-important reason that she doesn’t want her kids online at all.

“I worry about this so much,” she wrote. “My son has three band concerts a year and we’re in hiding from my ex-husband for our safety. I’m so scared he’s going to see a video and find us.”

Well, that’s enough information for me to never, ever do this. Just create a group chat with Nana and other relatives and post the video there. And honestly: No one else cares a ton about your kid singing “Frosty the Snowman,” even if it’s adorable to you.

]]><![CDATA[Therapist Says We Need To Switch Up The Messaging Our Boys Recieve]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/messaging-to-young-boys-tiktokhttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/messaging-to-young-boys-tiktokMon, 16 Dec 2024 23:02:33 GMT
raisingboysandgirls / TikTok

One licensed therapist and counselor on TikTok is doing the work to help educate and inform parents on how to raise a mentally healthier, more emotionally available son. On the account @raisingboysandgirls, licensed counselor and therapist, David Thomas, spoke about the messages boys receive and how we need to do the work to switch up that messaging.

“...around 9 to 10, a boy's brain will begin to channel all primary emotions — fear, sadness, confusion, disappointment — into one emotion. And what is that emotion? It's anger,” Dr. Thomas begins.

“And culturally, I think we send messages to boys that say it's okay to be angry, it's not okay to be sad. It's okay to be angry, it's not okay to be afraid or worry. So we're gonna have to push against these messages. And if that instinctive process is already happening somewhere around 9 to 10, and then on top of that, he's getting these different messages coming at him that are saying some version of, ‘Don't feel. Don't ask for help.’”

Dr. Thomas also says that the classic and totally toxic phrase, “Man up!” needs to go out the window before he explains what that phrase actually means on a larger scale.

“If we really dissect that, if we really think about what's within that wording, I think there are those messages of ‘stop feeling, stop having emotions, don't ask for help, take care of yourself.’ You know, think about all the different things that we tend to say to boys like, ‘You need to stop crying. That's not a big deal.’ Those messages, if we're really paying attention, are full of those instructions of ‘Don't feel, don't ask for help.’”

These kinds of messages are toxic, setting our sons up for total failure when it comes to being vulnerable, processing emotions in a healthy manner, and just being cooperative members of society. Dr. Thomas says we need to communicate to boys to really feel their feelings — whatever they may be. We need to reiterate to them that asking for help is always a good option when you feel stuck or confused.

He continues, “So rather than saying, you know, ‘Stop crying.’ I want boys to hear things like, “Let's work it through. I can tell you're having some big feelings. Let's work it through.’”

This kind of messaging shows that we, as parents, are there with them to help with an issue or big feeling while also bringing down that heightened state of arousal that could explode into anger. The goal is, ultimately, to move from a co-regulation solution to a self-regulation solution like teaching kid to ride a bike. It all takes practice. We have to go about it in steps.

“If they fall off the bike and get hurt, we're going to offer some comfort and support and help them dust off and get back on, hopefully, and go forward,” he said before offering up another alternative message when we feel like we just want to tell our angry sons to “calm down.”

“I want you to think how often we even say to boys things like, ‘Calm down, you need to calm down.’ And I think sometimes we say that, and we've not taught the skills of how to do that. Dr. Thomas says we just assume that young people know how to do this, but like playing an instrument, we usually have no idea. We need practice. We need guidance. It’s the same for kids.

]]><![CDATA[5 Last-Minute Holiday Shopping Tips To Find The Perfect Present]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/last-minute-holiday-shopping-tipshttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/last-minute-holiday-shopping-tipsMon, 16 Dec 2024 22:27:56 GMT
Phynart Studio/E+/Getty Images

Some people really love gift-giving and some people are stressed just by the thought of a White Elephant gift, but in the Venn diagram of these shoppers, there is the last-minute gift giver. We’ve all been there — whether you suddenly realize you need a gift for your cousin at the family party or you just waited too long to order something for your dad, last-minute gifts are a category for a reason. But shopping for a last-minute gift doesn’t have to be stressful. There are a few last-minute holiday shopping tips and tricks to keep in mind, especially if you’re past the prime shipping days.

Because right now, y’all, shipping is hit or miss. The USPS recommends priority mail by December 19, but we all know how things can change with a shipping date. Beyond that, you’re looking at paying extra for priority shipping or using other carriers. So if you need a last-minute gift, here’s our first tip: Get off Amazon. And then read the following tips so you can get someone a gift they’ll actually like and use — and isn’t so stressful for you to buy.

Don’t just browse online retailers.

You’re going to get super overwhelmed by browsing online retailers. Unless you know what you’re looking for, stay away from online shopping. With shipping times getting tight and really only being able to trust a few brands with two-day shipping — and even that gets dicey — it’s best not to Christmas shop by casually browsing the Target app. You need a plan.

Go into a store and actually look at items.

Look, I know you’re already stressed about a last-minute gift, but it’s truly beneficial for you to go into a store. Home Goods, Target, Walmart, Walgreens, TJ Maxx, your local boutique — there are still plenty of wonderful gifts in stores, and it will be so much more enjoyable to go in and find the gift you need. This is especially great if you have no idea what to get last-minute, and need to be inspired.

Go sentimental.

You know what’s a great present? Something sentimental. And honestly, they often make for nice last-minute gifts, too. Gift the person in your life a framed photo of a special memory, find a handwritten recipe from their grandmother and have it preserved, find a friend with a Cricut machine to personalize something for them — there are tons of great, last-minute sentimental gifts out there. It doesn’t have to be elaborate or even DIY, just as long as it means something to them.

Use the Klarna app.

I use Klarna for just about everything. Birthdays, any big hosting thing, the holidays — it’s just such a nice, easy way to pay for items without racking up a credit card (that I always swear I’ll pay off the next month and never do) and it just helps you budget — like layaway, but you get your things immediately. During the holiday season, it’s the best though for comparing prices. If there’s something you know you want to buy as a last-minute gift, search for it in the Klarna app. Not only will you be able to use the pay-in-4 method if you want, but the Klarna app will pull up all the stores it’s available at, and give you the shipping prices and which retailers offer cashback and other rewards through Klarna. It’s very cool and I’m absolutely not an app person — but I use this one constantly when shopping.

Think about the person you’re shopping for, not the gift itself.

This one sounds very Hallmark-y, I know, but it’s so easy to get caught up in buying gifts that all you can think about is what to gift rather than who is receiving the gift. Don’t just buy something for the sake of buying something — if you’re doing last-minute shopping, spend a few moments really thinking about the person you’re buying for. What do they like? What would they appreciate? What do they need? Maybe one of your recent interactions — like commenting on their cute sweater and them mentioning that they’ve been trying to wear more knits — will help point you in the right direction for shopping.

So, what last-minute gift idea is the perfect fit for your loved one?

]]><![CDATA[What Is "Away Game Parenting"? This Holiday Season Struggle, Explained]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/what-is-away-game-parentinghttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/what-is-away-game-parentingMon, 16 Dec 2024 21:53:49 GMT
TikTok / @myemtv

All right, team. We’ve got some big games coming up (holiday parties) and the opposing team (our beloved family) is not about to go easy on us.

You know that well-meaning, but totally irritating, habit your family members have of trying to help parent your kids, but they actually are doing the exact opposite? Or trying to look after your kids in an unfamiliar house or environment? Well, one mom put a name to this experience, and she’s calling it “away game parenting.”

Mom and content creator Emily Haswell posted a video to TikTok, explaining what the term means.

“The thing that is so stressful about away game parenting is that you and your toddler are typically having an active power struggle that is months long, that is really embarrassing to have play out in front of other adults,” Haswell said. “They’re not going to understand the historical context there.”

Haswell gave the example of her 2-year-old daughter, who refuses to give up her bottle and use a sippy cup. Despite Haswell’s best efforts, nothing would help, so her compromise solution is to ask for 10 sips from the sippy cup, and then allowing her daughter to use the bottle.

A completely reasonable solution when you’re an exhausted parent with a stubborn kid, right?

Well, Haswell’s relatives had plenty to say about her daughter’s habit, and as you can probably guess, none of it was particularly helpful. Away game parenting season means just a few too many players on the field, and none of them are familiar enough with the plays to make a meaningful difference.

“Poor Memaw will mean so well,” Haswell explained. “She’ll say, ‘Sadie, you know sippy cups are for big girls?’ Memaw, you’re bringing a knife to a gunfight right now. Do you think I’ve never mentioned to her that sippy cups are for big girls? She knows sippy cups are for big girls. She doesn’t care to be a big girl.”

“Or, you know, beloved Uncle Bip-Bap is going to go, ‘It’s New Year’s Eve. Let her have a sippy cup,’” she continued. “But, there’s been no ceasefire called, babe! There’s been no ceasefire called!”

Feel familiar? Parents in the comments certainly thought so, with many sharing what they expect their biggest away game obstacle to be.

“When they accidentally say the word you spelled out loud in front of the toddler…” one user commented.

“My toddler currently hates long sleeves and must push them up no matter the weather. My mom is always worried about him being cold. It’s going to be great...” added another.

Best of luck to all the parents gearing up for their own away games in the coming weeks. We’re rooting for you!

]]><![CDATA[8 Apps To Help Kids Connect With Their Grandparents]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/apps-to-help-kids-connect-with-their-grandparentshttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/apps-to-help-kids-connect-with-their-grandparentsMon, 16 Dec 2024 20:21:32 GMT
Halfpoint Images/Moment/Getty Images

Having your grandparents down the street, or even in the same zip code, is not always a reality for a lot of kids. Families move more often and much farther than in generations past, and it’s likely that you have to work a little harder to make sure your kids and their grandparents keep in touch. Fortunately, there are many great apps to help grandparents stay connected with their grandkids. From playing games against each other and having watch parties, to even reading bedtime stories, there are some seriously sweet options out there.

Yes, of course there’s always FaceTime — it’s always going to be the best way to catch up on the happenings this past week (or, if you’re like my mom, to get carted around the house in phone form by my toddler while he shows her his latest pillow fort). And for older kids, Facebook Messenger Kids, calls, texts — the usuals still work. But some of the magic of being grandparents, like having the kids over to play and watch movies, gets lost long distance. And the joy of having grandkids, like seeing the wonky art project they made at school today, can slip through the cracks, too. But not with apps like these.

Zoog

Zoog calls itself a video storytelling app, meant to replace boring video calls for kids who just aren’t great at small talk and staying engaged with grandparents on the other end. Read classic kids’ books or tell riddles, stories, or educational lessons, all with fun filters and by becoming part of the animations. Yes, your Zoogs will be saved forever, so grandkids can watch their favorites again and again.

Cost: $9.99 a month (though there are some freebies in the app you can try before committing to the paid plan)

Caribu

Caribu is an app created by Mattel to essentially have virtual playdates with family who lives far away. It’s intended for babies up through 13-year-olds, with games, drawing activities, and stories to read together virtually. The app is available on phones, tablets, and computers, so however the grands are comfortable connecting should be an option.

Cost: $9.99 per family each month, or $79.99 a year

Readeo

Readeo’s tagline is “read together from anywhere,” and yeah, that about sums it up. Video chat the grandkids while you read a book together onscreen, from new releases and holiday stories, Spanish titles and children’s classics, like Olivia or Chicka Chicka Boom Boom. This app’s geared to kids 0 to 11.

Cost: Free, or $14.99 monthly for unlimited library access and extra features (like bookmarking)

Marco Polo

Marco Polo is one of the more well-known video chatting apps, and for good reason. It allows for video calling and texting, as well as sharing photos and videos, leaving video messages, and more. Unlike Snapchat, these things don’t self-destruct after 10 seconds, and the app is more secure for kids (no suggestions to add random strangers). It’s a great choice for tweens or teens who are app savvy and want to connect with Grandma, but are too old for bedtimes stories.

Cost: Free with in-app purchases, or Plus plans starting at $5 a month (with lots of added features, listed here)

Keepy

Keepy is mainly like an organizational tool for parents — Keepy lets you photograph your child’s school projects and artworks to catalog digitally instead of hoarding all that paper — and record mementos and stories about the things you save to attach to them. But then you can add family members to be your kid’s “fan” and give them access to the memories via phone or web. There, they can comment, leave video messages, and more about all the big moments in your child’s life (and even print their photos or artwork onto keepsake items).

Cost: Free with in-app purchases

Words With Friends

A classic phone game to play with friends and family, Words With Friends still holds up. This Scrabble-like puzzle game invites each player, wherever they are, to take a turn building words in a crossword-like way and scoring points as they go. It’s a nice way to interact between generations, especially with teen grandkids who aren’t eager to talk about their days at school lately.

Cost: Free with in-app purchases

Kast

If watching movies or TV shows together is a big part of how your kids spend time with their grandparents — I, for one, have fond memories of watching Keeping Up Appearances with mine — then Kast is where it’s at. This app live streams your screen to another user so you can watch flicks together in real time, with some additional chat features you can use while you’re at it.

Cost: Free, but the screen will be watermarked. A subscription costs $6.49 per month.

Kinsome

The app Kinsome has a little bit of everything. Daily Shares sends conversation starters to kids, and prompts them questions to choose from to learn more about their grandparents’ lives and family history. There are also some games they can play together at the same time. Grandparents don’t need to download the app or even have a smartphone — they can receive invites to play and converse via email link or text.

Cost: Free, but with a $4.99 premium subscription option coming soon

]]><![CDATA[Mom Decides Not To Initiate Any Holiday Magic]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/mom-decided-not-to-initiate-any-holiday-magic-until-her-family-took-chargehttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/mom-decided-not-to-initiate-any-holiday-magic-until-her-family-took-chargeMon, 16 Dec 2024 17:24:15 GMT
Melissa Neely

Moms are the holiday magic. This we know. They are the ones who decorate the house, plan the trips to see Christmas lights, shop for the gifts (and then wrap them), and pretty much make the entire holiday season run smoothly. Moms are basically Santa Claus. And we’re so very tired.

One married mom to three grown sons posted a TikTok, sharing that she would not be lifting one finger to decorate or get a Christmas tree, waiting on her family to take the lead. Her social experiment went viral after she shared her plan.

“Today is December 13th, and no one has mentioned getting a Christmas tree or decorating for Christmas. The tree would probably go right there in that corner and no one has said anything about getting out the decorations, going and getting a tree for Christmas,” Melissa Neely shared.

“So we’re just going to wait and see if anybody mentions getting a Christmas tree, and if they don’t, maybe we won’t put up a Christmas tree this year.”

Neely, 55, shares that she’s been married for 30 years with three grown sons, two of which still live at home.

“We’ll see if they decide they want a Christmas tree or if they bring it up or even mention it, and we’ll see how long it goes until we actually decorate for Christmas, or maybe we won’t decorate for Christmas this year. So we’re just going to just wait and see what happens.”

After her video went viral, several TikTok users commented on the clip, sharing their solidarity with Neely and empathy for her situation.

“This resonates with me. Women/moms carry the burden of the ‘magic.’ It’s exhausting,” one user noted.

Another user pointed out a very clear distinction in Neely’s life. “The operative word here is ‘sons,’” they wrote.

“If I waited for the men in my house to get excited about Christmas decor we wouldn’t have any. I decorate for me,” one user said to which others agreed that they decorate their home for themselves because they appreciate it.

At this point, people were invested in Neely’s experiment. Thankfully, she posted updates.

In an update video, she noted there was a “brief, tiny mentioning” about getting a tree that very same evening. However, other than that, no initiative was taken.

“But I didn’t reply as, ‘Oh, we should do it on this day or go to this place’ or I didn’t offer up any details on how anything was going to happen for Christmas. I’m just waiting to see who’s going to come up with the details and if it’s going to happen or not,” she said.

“It’s just an experiment for fun that I’m doing to entertain myself.”

On Dec. 15, she posted another update, and lo and behold, the video showed her husband walking into the house with a Christmas tree!

“Christmas tree has been purchased on his way home from yoga. He stopped and picked up a really cute Christmas tree,” she shared.

“So how exciting, and to be fair, he does the most. He really does. It’s hard to keep up with him. He just is constantly doing a project. So it’s not that he is not interested in Christmas or wasn’t tasked with it. It was just my own humor of trying to see how long the lack of a Christmas tree would go on. And it actually didn’t go on that long, December 15th. That’s still how many days away from Christmas. We’re so ahead. We’re so ahead.”

But that begs the question... who is going to decorate it?

]]><![CDATA[Lala Kent Defends Editing 3-Year-Old's Smile Amid Backlash]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/entertainment/lala-kent-edit-daughters-teethhttps://www.scarymommy.com/entertainment/lala-kent-edit-daughters-teethMon, 16 Dec 2024 16:12:54 GMT
Bravo/NBCUniversal/Getty Images

Lala Kent, former Vanderpump Rules reality star and mom of two, faced some criticism after fans noticed that her oldest daughter, Ocean, appeared to have edited features on photos Kent would post on her social media.

She recently shared a photo dump, where a handful of people commented on Ocean's teeth, calling them “brown” or wondering if there was “rot.” In some of the photos, you can clearly see some discoloration.

While she admits she’s “usually the type to read/ignore comments,” she couldn’t resist clapping back via her Instagram story.

“We are from Utah honey,” she wrote. “We are teeth people! so I could not let this comment slide.”

“Ocean has a fond relationship with her wild side and enjoys not listening,” she wrote.

“She fell off her bike face first. There is trauma to the root of her two front teeth (yes, I’m the mom who usually edits this. Go ahead and judge. The root isn’t dead, but we go to the dentist every 3-6 months for check-ins. They will likely have to be pulled or she will have to have a root canal.”

After a child takes a fall or hits their tooth, there can be damage to the blood vessels in the tooth, causing it to turn gray, brown, black, or purple. This usually happens a few weeks after the injury.

Lala Kent / Instagram

Most of the time, a discolored baby tooth will get better on its own. As long as the tooth doesn’t become infected, it will fall out when the child gets older, and a healthy adult tooth will grow in its place.

The Give Them Lala podcast co-host welcomed Ocean in March 2021, seven months before her split from Emmett, 53.

In March, Kent welcomed another baby girl, Sosa, conceived with the help of a sperm donor.

Now, Kent is focusing on her family of three.

“For real though, Ocean is absolutely obsessed with Sosa,” Kent wrote via Instagram at the time. “It was love at first sight. We are all over the moon about the newest addition to our pod. I can’t wait to share all the moments of this new chapter and blessing in our life.”

]]><![CDATA[Partner Goes To Bed At A Different Time Than You? Don't Worry]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/partner-goes-to-bed-at-a-different-time-than-you-dont-worryhttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/partner-goes-to-bed-at-a-different-time-than-you-dont-worryMon, 16 Dec 2024 15:23:53 GMT
AzmanL/E+/Getty Images

My husband and I are absolutely best friends. We love watching the same movies and TV shows together, we love going out to concerts and fun date nights, and we love talking about anything and everything. But one thing we differ a lot on is our preferred schedule. While my husband is a night owl who prefers staying up late (like 2 a.m. late) and sleeping in, I much prefer getting up before the sun and going to bed around the same time as our three children. But much like not going to bed angry, going to bed at the same time as your partner is often seen as good relationship advice. It’s supposed to keep you close and in sync, and is generally considered “better” than going to bed at separate times. But why? What does it mean if you and your partner go to bed at different times?

“Honestly, nothing,” Jackie Hunter, a family therapist, tells Scary Mommy. “It’s more than just going to bed at the same time, it’s what you do before bed and how you find quality time that matters.”

Hunter says that the kind of black-and-white relationship advice, like “make sure you go to bed at the same time every night,” doesn’t work for everyone. “All relationship advice like this is circumstantial. Is it a good idea to be with your partner at the end of the evening? Yes, of course. Does that mean you have to go to bed when your partner goes to sleep, even if you aren’t ready? Not at all.”

Instead of focusing on what time you go to bed, Hunter says what matters is how you spend quality time. Since that post-bedtime-dinner-cleanup time is so precious to many couples, figure out how to spend that time together and make it work for your relationship. For some couples, that might mean playing a game, watching a movie, or just sitting next to each other sharing Reels back and forth and laughing about them. For others, it might mean having alone time, and then meeting back together in bed for an episode of Friends before falling asleep.

And when it comes to your sex life? Don’t let that depend on your bedtime. “You don’t have to have sex at bedtime forever,” Hunter says. “If your sex life isn’t what you want it to be, figure it out together.” That might mean making plans or having sex during a time you wouldn’t usually; but a different bedtime doesn’t always mean your relationship is lacking intimacy.

“Bottom line — if your different bedtimes don’t feel right, then do what does. If you wish your spouse would come to bed with you for an intimate moment, tell them that’s what you’d like. Maybe after some time together, you can then go to sleep while they stay up a little later. If you want to start spending more quality time together before bedtime so you can each go to sleep on your own schedule, do it. Talk to your partner. Communication is everything, regardless of bedtimes,” Hunter says.

So don’t base your relationship’s entire intimacy and connection level on your bedtimes. Advice is just that: advice. And whatever works for you and your partner works for you, regardless if it’s the “right” way to do a relationship.

And that means for my husband and me, I’ll keep letting him tuck me into bed with Friends before he goes back downstairs. I know we love each other — and our own sleep schedules.

]]><![CDATA[The Era Of 8 Hanukkah Presents Is Over In My House & I Feel So Free]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/shopping/the-era-of-8-hanukkah-presents-is-over-in-my-house-thank-g-dhttps://www.scarymommy.com/shopping/the-era-of-8-hanukkah-presents-is-over-in-my-house-thank-g-dMon, 16 Dec 2024 14:01:25 GMT
Cavan Images/Cavan/Getty Images

I ran out of hiding spots for Hanukkah presents last year. When my boys were young, I hid them in the coat closet, then our basement storage room, and eventually, I stashed them behind our living room couch. But nothing gets past my older son — he found them every year.

Each fall, I’d make a list in the Notes app on my phone. Eight was the magic number. There had to be eight boxes for each child. “What should we get them this year?” I’d whine to my husband as if he miraculously had eight ideas per kid. But the stress of this decision always fell on me. Making the list was my chore.

Half their presents were toys or games. I’ll always remember their buoyant voices when they opened a gift they’d been hoping for like the PJ Mask headquarters or a Lego set destined to be built then destroyed. The other half were necessities. They didn’t cheer quite as excitedly when they found underwear or crew socks or a winter hat and gloves in their gift box (okay, they didn’t cheer at all).

I’d try to anticipate what they’d need in the coming months and do my best to hold off until Hanukkah. If they needed new sneakers, say, it was the perfect time for new kicks. But some years, the holiday began late, and the first snowfall arrived early — they’d need snow boots by late November, or they’d outgrow their underwear by Halloween. So I’d give them new underwear and purchase a toy in its place only to find it buried in the corner of the playroom under junk they’d lost interest in soon later.

This year, I am free from the burden of presents. And it’s just another reason why I love parenting children beyond their younger years.

As Hanukkah approached, I’d spend half a day on the floor with wrapping paper, Scotch tape, and scissors. “I’m not wrapping the presents next year,” I’d announce, just as I did the year prior, when I watched my hard work torn to shreds and taken to the curb with the recycling. Then, of course, motherly guilt would set in by the next September, and I’d find myself back on the floor.

A present nightly was magical for the younger years, but at 10 and 13 years old, those days are over. We’re not giving our boys a gift for each night of Hanukkah anymore and it’s the best feeling in the world. This year, I didn’t make a list. There will be no wrapping paper. “You’ve got holes in your socks? No problem! Here’s a new pack.” And best of all, I’ll never need a new hiding spot again.

That said, we are giving them a surprise: a foosball table that we’ve long thought about getting. It will be the one tangible Hanukkah gift they receive this year, and will mark the beginning of our playroom from a toy-filled jumble to a (more) streamlined room. Lately, my boys have been opting for experiences over toys, anyway, even for birthdays. They enjoy seeing the Philadelphia 76ers play basketball more than receiving a board game or a puzzle. As a Hanukkah present, they went to their first Eagles game last week. Experiences can’t be wrapped into a box and opened like a traditional Hanukkah present, but they also won’t find their way into the corner of our playroom. And it’s just another reason why I love parenting children beyond their younger years.

“What do you love most about Hanukkah?” I asked my 10-year-old last night, feeling guilty about the change. “Celebrating with family and lighting the menorah,” he told me. Neither of my boys have asked for tangible gifts this year. They’re maturing, and our holiday traditions will follow their lead. Now I know we made the right choice.

]]><![CDATA[My 26-Year-Old Is Mad We Let Her Believe In Santa]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/26-year-old-mad-we-let-her-believe-in-santahttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/26-year-old-mad-we-let-her-believe-in-santaMon, 16 Dec 2024 13:00:24 GMT
Emma Chao/Scary Mommy; Getty Images/Adobe

I was initially against pitching Santa to my kids. I believe it’s mean to hype up a concept that will end up deeply disappointing them. But I caved, and so the myth continued for another generation. It wasn’t the first or the last time I ignored my gut and bowed to outside pressure, but it’s one I still regret. A little.

There are those aspects of parenting you’re sure you’ll be good at, principles you think you’ll never subvert. But decision-making is rarely that simple. I thought my partner and I would be on the same page about this, but he was adamant that Santa was what made Christmas special, particularly in a secular family like ours. I turned to my sister, a practical elementary school teacher, hoping she’d agree with me. She asked if I was planning to raise my kids in a world barren of magic and awe. Ouch.

So, I caved.

It’s weird to lie to your kids. Not that I think we should give them the unvarnished truth before they’re ready for it, but don’t we tell them over and over that honesty is the way to go? Then we turn around and spin tales of dentally obsessed fairies and omniscient old men who break into their homes to leave them gifts — all the while knowing that we will be found out one day, and it will break their hearts (if only a little).

My oldest was one of those kids who embraced magic in all its forms. Fairies, the Great Pumpkin, the Easter Bunny, and the Hogwarts staff were not just real but deeply loved members of her extended family. It wasn’t surprising when she clung to her belief in Santa Claus long after her peers, and even her little sister, had let it go.

Everyone in her class had come to terms with the myth of Santa. Maybe older siblings had clued them in; maybe they’d figured out that characters only seen in books and on TV were too good to be true. But my kid believed with the fervor of a child who had already had some of her finest assumptions shattered. She’d been forced to leave her first home and sanctuary for a life spent traveling between the homes of her divorced parents. She clung to her faith that some good things survived.

I did my best to keep the lie alive. My only real concession to my conscience was ignoring Santa himself and giving all the credit to his wife, so every year, there was at least one present for each kid from Mrs. Claus. I painstakingly wrote the tag with my left hand to disguise my writing. I started to see why parents like maintaining the myth; it’s kind of fun to trick your kids, though it still doesn’t feel right to me.

Then, one day, my darling child looked me in the eye and asked that dreaded question: “Is Santa real?” I had to tell her the truth, but in a moment of self-preservation, I did what so many parents do: I equivocated.

“Well, there’s not really a guy who flies around bringing presents. Santa is the spirit of Christmas, of spreading love and joy. But he’s more of an idea than a real thing.” Or something to that effect. I couldn’t quite bring myself to say, “Yeah, that guy you’re so obsessed with? Not real. Sorry for the misunderstanding!” I mean, that was going to happen to her at some point in her dating life, why burst her bubble at age 10?

It’s been years, and she’s still not completely over it. As a slightly jaded young adult, she’s determined not to make the same mistake with her own future children. She loves all the trappings of Christmas (and the other holidays; her Halloween parties are legendary) but is determined to embrace the magic without introducing a fantasy that will end in tears.

And me? I’m relieved. I won’t have to smile and lie to another generation of kids, dreading the day they look at me with eyes full of accusation and pain. Am I against magic? No way. I just keep it where it belongs, in a shroud of mystery and wonder. I don’t need a figurehead to believe in the miraculous. It’s all around us all the time. Opening a child’s eyes to the enchantment of the real world feels way more helpful than investing in yet another disappointing hero.

Julia Williamson is based in Portland, OR. She’s a freelance writer, a decluttering maven, and spends a fair amount of time cursing the rain.

]]><![CDATA[65 Weird-As-Hell Things That Are Actually Pure Genius & Under $30 On Amazon]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/shopping/weird-as-hell-things-that-are-actually-pure-genius-under-30-on-amazonhttps://www.scarymommy.com/shopping/weird-as-hell-things-that-are-actually-pure-genius-under-30-on-amazonSun, 15 Dec 2024 23:40:08 GMT

If you’re in the market for products will enhance your life and make things easier around the house, this is the list for you. As a bonus, they’re also all a little weird but 100% genius. Not only that, the items you’ll find here are all under $30, so no bank accounts shall suffer as you peruse.

This Adorable Flame-Shaped Lamp That Really Flickers

It’s hard not to fall in love with this cutie flame lamp. The LED lamp is inspired by a vintage kerosene lamp and makes a great nightstand lamp. You can switch between a candlelight mode, which mimics the effect of a real candle flame, and a nightlight mode where the light stays still.

A Magnetic Spice Rack That Can Stick To Your Fridge

This pack of four spice shelves has such a genius design — the back side of them is outfitted with a strong magnet that adheres them to the side of your fridge, so you can store spices near where you cook without having to dedicate precious cabinet space. Each shelf holds up to 8 pounds.

This Silly Facewash Headband That Comes In Multiple Colors

Your kid will think this face wash headband is hilarious because, well, it is. Backed by an impressive overall score of 4.7 out of five stars on Amazon, this soft and cozy headband features two snail eyes on top, making face-washing fun. It absorbs water as you wash, and it’s available in 11 colors. Since it’s elastic, it’s generally a good fit for both kids and adults.

This Ridiculously Cute Miniature Cat On A Chair Figurine

This miniature cat figurine on a small sofa doesn’t serve a purpose except to bring immense joy to anyone lucky enough to see it. The decorative piece is an ideal gift for cat lovers for very obvious reasons (hint: it’s ridiculously adorable), but the company also sells a cute frog reading a book while drinking coffee. With an overall score of 4.8 out of five stars, one reviewer wrote, “So cute to bring some creativity into your workspace.”

An Outlet Extender That Fits Compactly Against The Wall

With over 29,000 reviews and a high 4.7-star rating, this outlet extender is a great way to lend more functionality without taking up a bunch of room. It fits neatly against the wall and provides you with five AC outlets, three USB-A ports, and one USB-C port. Plus, it features built-in surge protection to keep your circuits and devices safe.

Some Super Fun Fridge Magnets That Change Shape

These little magnet people are so fun to play with that your kids might keep stealing them from the refrigerator. The pack comes with 10 magnets crafted from a soft silicone resin in multiple colors that are bendable and shape-changing. They can be used as fidget toys or even as key holders on a magnetized background.

A Pretty Organizer For Your Car Registration & Insurance

Keep your car registration and insurance documents in a holder that’s not only pretty, but easy to find when you need it (which hopefully, you won’t). This organizer is made from faux leather and comes in a variety of colors, and the interior has pockets for all your papers. It’s highly rated, with a 4.8-star overall rating.

These Best-Selling Dual-Sided Sneaker Cleaners To Whiten Shoes

Make your sneakers whiter when you use these best-selling dual-sided sneaker cleaners that work impressively well. The white side of the sponge naturally breaks down as you use it and the orange side wipes away leftover marks. The sponges come in a 10-pack (as well as a 20-pack) and they can be used more than once.

This Best-Selling Dryer Vent Cleaner Kit With Over 28,000 5-Star Ratings

Attach the hose in this dryer vent cleaning kit to your existing vacuum and suck out all the fuzz and lint from the vent trap, helping to prevent vent fires. Backed by well over 28,000 five-star reviews on Amazon, the kit comes with a hose, two adapters, and a vacuum cleaner hose. It also works well at cleaning hard-to-reach areas in your home.

A 5-Pack Of Quick-Drying, Sweat-Wicking Handkerchiefs

These handkerchiefs are designed specifically to absorb sweat. The microfiber towels come in a five-pack, and they’re small enough to fit in a pocket, bag, or purse. Since the towels are small, they can be used to wipe away sweat discreetly, and they will dry 10 times faster than normal towels.

A Cushioned Detangling Brush With 2 Bristle Lengths That Works On Both Wet & Dry Hair

Available in 25 colors, this unique detangling brush includes anti-static bristles and a cozy cushion for added comfort. Great for all ages and genders, this brush is vented and includes two bristle lengths to detangle hair with ease. It has a lightweight handle, and is great for both wet and dry hair.

Adhesive Chalkboard Contact Paper That Can Help Personalize Any Room

This easy-to-use contact paper can help personalize any room, even your kitchen. Use it to jot down family reminders, the meal plan for the week, or anything else that can help you get more organized. The peel-and-stick paper has adhesive on the back for a quick installation, and it comes with five pieces of chalk so you can use it right away. You can also adhere it to desks and tables.

These Fuzzy Heel Sleeves That Add Deep Moisture

Wake up to softer feet when you slip on these moisturizing heel sleeves before bed. The soft and fuzzy socks feature a gel lining that’s infused with hydrating ingredients like olive oil, jojoba seed oil, and vitamin E. They’re reusable, and the open design keeps you from overheating.

An Over-The-Sink Dish Rack That Comes With Its Own Drying Mat

This ingenious dish rack gives you lots of drying flexibility. It’s designed to sit over the sink so that clean dishes can drain directly into the basin but it can also rest on the included microfiber mat which absorbs moisture efficiently. It has enough space to fit up to 16 dishes and comes with a handy utensil caddy that can be removed if needed.

An Eyelash Comb That Creates A Natural, Fluffy Look

The 18,000 reviewers who gave this eyelash comb a perfect five-star rating must be onto something. It has ultra-fine tines that reach between clumpy lashes, separating them for a natural, fluffy look. The curved design mimics the natural shape of your eye, while the long handle offers amazing control.

This 10-Pack Of Battery-Powered Celebratory Bottle Lights

Add some sparkle to your alcohol bottles using these wine bottle lights for a party or just for your own enjoyment. The 10-pack of LED lights is attached to a universally sized cork that fits into most wine bottles and liquor bottles. They are battery-powered and come with pre-installed batteries. You can get them in warm white, or a mix of colors.

These Soap Sheets That Dissolve With A Bit Of Water

Clean hands easily while you’re out and about using these clever soap sheets. Each thin sheet requires just a touch of water to dissolve into a foamy antibacterial lather. They come in a set of three packs, each with a different scent (tea tree, sweet orange, and lavender), and are perfect for popping into your bag or pocket to have clean, moisturized skin whenever the need arises.

This Heatless Curling Set That Takes Minutes To Set Up

If you want curls without the damage, these heatless curling headbands are ideal. They take mere minutes to set up and can be used overnight to achieve shiny, long-lasting curls for the next day. Each band is made from hair-friendly soft satin, making it a much less damaging process than using a curling iron. Two scrunchies are also included.

A Microwave Splatter Cover That Prevents Messes

Make microwave mishaps a thing of the past with this ingenious splatter cover that’s a highly rated best-seller on Amazon. Besides preventing food explosions, it helps ensure even cooking while preventing food from drying out, too. It’s dishwasher safe and collapses for storage that’s a cinch.

These Super Fun Popsicle Molds With Reusable Sticks

Perfect for kids who enjoy the finer things in life, these zombie popsicle molds are perfect for parties or simply the weekend. The silicone molds come in a set of four and make fun, detailed zombie characters. They feature a drip guard to keep little hands clean, they can go in the dishwasher, and they come with reusable sticks. If zombies aren’t your thing, they come in other great designs like monsters, mermaids, penguins, dinosaurs, ocean animals, and zoo animals.

A Weighted Lap Blanket To Snuggle Up In Soothing Comfort

Make nap time or lounge time that much more soothing using this genius weighted lap blanket. Designed in the shape of a leaf, the blanket features a soft microfiber surface and glass beads that remain evenly-distributed for a comforting heaviness. Available in five colors, it’s machine-washable and can be worn over the lap, the shoulders, or anywhere you could use a touch of pacifying support.

This Genius Chopping Board That Folds

The dishwasher-safe design on this genius chopping board make it an ideal choice for chopping fruits and veggies. Its innovative folding design and innovative handle make it easy to transfer food without spilling, plus it comes in a set of two, so you’ll always have one on hand.

This Genius Way To Boil Pasta In The Microwave

Your favorite easy weeknight meal just got even easier, thanks to this microwavable pasta maker. This genius gadget makes an al dente batch — with no noodles sticking to each other — with minimal cleanup. Just measure and fill with noodles and water, then use the straining lid to pour off excess water. The best part? It works with just about every type of pasta.

The Memory Foam Cushion For Your Center Console

No armrest in the car? Give your elbow a comfy spot with this center console cushion. The cushion is made with 1.5-inch-thick memory foam for a soft, supportive feel. It has a universal fit — just slip the attached sleeve over the console lid.

This Absorbent Terry Cloth Shower Wrap That Stays Put

When you get out of the shower, dry off with this absorbent shower wrap that takes the place of a regular towel. The terry cloth wrap features a magic sticker closure, an elastic top band design, and an extra-large pocket. It also acts as a bathrobe and is ideal for wearing as you do your hair and makeup.

  • Available sizes: Small — X-Large
  • Available colors: 12

This Toilet Paper Spray That Takes The Place Of Wet Wipes

Spray toilet paper with this toilet paper spray three to five times to create a flushable wet wipe. It’ll save money on actual wet wipes and the formula is free of harsh ingredients. Plus, the spray is an environmentally friendly way to clean yourself without clogging plumbing or septic tanks.

This Space-Saving Egg Drawer That Snaps Under A Shelf

This snap-on refrigerator egg drawer snaps underneath a shelf and protects your eggs from cracking. The adjustable slide-out shelf is a convenient way to reach your eggs without having to take the entire carton out of the fridge. The drawer can hold 18 eggs, but be sure to check the listing for dimension information to ensure it fits.

A Set Of Wire Mesh Fruit Baskets With Convenient Lids That Help Keep Bugs At Bay

With a design that allows for plenty of airflow, this set of mesh fruit baskets help keep fruit fresh longer than an enclosed bowl. With a stable base that’d look great on any counter, these colorful baskets come with a cute lid that prevents fruit flies and other bugs from getting in. They’re a great way to keep eyes on your fruit inventory while keeping your produce protected.

The Cat Scratch Shields That Rescue Your Furniture

If your feline friend has confused your couch for his scratching post, these cat scratch shields will set them right. The flexible panels adhere to the sides of your furniture and create a slippery surface that not only protects the upholstery, but discourages your kitty from clawing. The clear design is barely noticeable and the included twist pins help ensure a secure fit.

These Clever Wall Hooks That Comes In Multiple Color Options

Hang your purses, backpacks, jackets, jewelry, and whatever else on these decorative wall-mounted hooks. They aren’t just wall hooks, though — they are cleverly shaped like tiny climbers. Each of the hooks in the three-pack is just under seven inches tall. If you prefer over-the-door hooks, those are available too.

This Unique Spine-Shaped Candle That Makes A Fun Gift

Whether it’s for a white elephant gift, a gift for a neurosurgeon, or a gift for someone who just likes weirdly cool stuff, this spine candle is uniquely awesome. This handcrafted soy candle looks like an actual spine, each vertebra with an accurate and lifelike design. Also available in black, you’ll get six to seven hours of burn time with this candle.

This Car Phone Mount That Goes In A Cup Holder

Stick this car phone mount in a cup holder to always have it right next to you. The adjustable phone holder has a gooseneck that allows you to move it to the position that works best for you. It has a quick-release button and a universal fit for all types of phones.

This Handheld Weeder Tool That Reaches Down To The Root

Don’t go through the trouble of digging a big hole to get the entire root of weeds from your lawn or garden when you can use this handheld weeder tool that gets the whole root while leaving surrounding plants intact. The aluminum tool is lightweight but sturdy and it has a soft ergonomic grip for easy use.

This Reversible Umbrella With A Pretty Sunflower Interior Design

The great thing about this reversible umbrella is that it’s designed with a reversible folding frame to prevent water drips when it’s time to put it away. It’s also windproof and waterproof, making it a great go-to for stormy days. The flip side of the umbrella is printed with a pretty yellow flower, and its C-shaped handle allows you to hold it hands-free.

A Quirky Handheld Instrument Built From Mahoghany That’s Bound To Be A Conversation-Starter

Pick up a brand new talent with this 17-key thumb piano. Playing on it can help manage stress and anxiety, so it might be a great addition to your work desk when you need a break. Crafted from a solid mahoghany, it looks as beautiful as it sounds, and learning how to play is easier than you think. No matter what, this quirky and lightweight instrument is bound to be a conversation-starter.

These Wood Markers That Repair Scuffed Furniture

If rambunctious children or pets have left indelible scuffs on your prized furniture, don’t be dismayed. Turn to these wood markers that cost under $10 and can make it seem like no damage was caused. They come in a set of six in a range of shades along with six wax sticks and a sharpener to fill in deeper scratches. Simply match up the correct marker to your wood and fill in the marks to make your furniture look free of imperfections.

This Hilariously Disturbing Party Game For Horror Movie Fans

Don’t Get Stabbed is a party game that encourages you to annihilate your family and friends for pretend — all in good fun, of course. The game is inspired by horror movies from the ‘70s, ‘80s, and ‘90s, and is meant for people ages 15 and up. It’s suitable for three to five players, is easy to learn, and is bound to lead to a fun night.

These Invisible Acne Patches That Help You Prevent Picking While You Heal

While acne can heal with time, you can help speed up the process with these invisible spot patches, which can help suck out the gunk while being mostly undetected on your skin. They’re also a great way to stop picking at acne or other scabs so that they have the time they require to heal. Packed with hydrocolloid, these also include skin-friendly ingredients like tea tree, calendula, and rosehip seed oil. You get 24 patches in every box.

The Waterproof Splash Mat That Contains Pet Food Messes

If you’ve got a four-legged pal who happens to be an enthusiastic eater, this splash mat is a must have. This mat is made from waterproof silicone, with raised edges that contain water and kibble spills. It comes in a variety of colors and sizes and boasts an anti-skid backing to keep it locked in place.

  • Available sizes: 5
  • Available colors: 30

A Sheer Nail Concealer For Healthier Nails In-Between Heavy Manicures

Apply this sheer yet buildable nail concealer in between your manicures to restore your nails and give them a subtle glow. It can also be used as a standalone nail polish that adds some color and protection to your nails instead of the standard nail polish. This one lasts for quite a while, and it is available in a variety of colors.

This Best-Selling & Adorable Loch Ness Ladle That Stands On Its Own

Add a little fun to cooking when you use this soup ladle that’s shaped like Nessie the Loch Ness monster. The small ladle is adorable, but it’s also efficient and helpful in the kitchen. It stands upright on the loch ness’ four feet, either on the counter or in a pot, to help keep your countertops clean.

A Handheld Chicken Shredder For Salads & Barbecue

This chicken shredder is an amazing kitchen ally when you’re whipping up a salad or barbecue sandwiches. Just place an already-cooked breast between the two pieces, then twist the top to create bite-size shreds. This dishwasher-safe gadget is a best-seller on Amazon, with a 4.6-star overall rating.

These Candle Lighters That Work In All Kinds Of Weather

Lighting a birthday cake in windy conditions? It’ll be no problem when you have one of these candle lighters in your back pocket. They come in a set of two and are USB-C rechargeable. Instead of a traditional flame, they use an electric pulse, therefore being impervious to wind. In addition, the flexible gooseneck allows you to reach any wick no matter how difficult or awkward.

An LED Backlight That Transforms Your TV-Viewing Experience

Make movie night into something truly special when you mount this LED backlight to your TV. It can be easily cut to size and uses simple self-adhesive to stick to the back of your TV with the ability to be plugged into the USB port for power. Choose from 15 available colors as well as 10 levels of brightness to dial-in an enhanced viewing experience with better contrast and less eye strain.

These Cooling Pillowcases For A Soothing Night’s Sleep

Enjoy a perfectly temperate sleep using these cooling pillowcases made with fibers that absorb your body’s heat. Available in 11 colors, they feature an anti-static texture as well as soft and breathable cotton jersey on the bottom. Soothing for both hair and skin, the pillowcases can be either hand or machine-washed.

A Mess-Free Toilet Seat Handle That Keeps Your Hands Clean

If you want to encourage certain people in your family to put the toilet seat down after they use it (looking at you, boys) this pack of two toilet seat handles can help. The toilet handle is made from recycled ocean plastic and comes with 3M adhesive for toilet seats with a curved bottom. It allows you to lift the seat and put it down without getting your hands germy.

These Cozy Sleep Headphones That Double As An Eye Mask

If you like to listen while you sleep but don’t want to disturb your partner, these sleep headphones are an excellent solution. The Bluetooth headband doubles as an eye mask while you sleep and also makes for a great pair of running headphones since they stay put on your head — something that can be hard to come by for runners.

A Purse Organizer To Keep Your Collection In Tip-Top Shape

Take those squashed bags on your closet floor and give them the care they deserve by storing them in this purse organizer. It hangs on your closet rod and provides you with eight pockets (four on each side) for small to large bags. Clear windows allow you to see what’s stored where with the open sides making it easy to grab your purse of choice and head out the door.

This Small BBQ Scraper That’s Much Safer Than Bristles

Ditch your wire BBQ brush with bristles for this stainless steel grill scraper. The scaper is small and can fit anywhere, and since it doesn’t have the risk of bristles coming off in food, it’s safer to use. With a bunch of different notches, this cleaning tool is designed to be compatible with a ton of different grills, including those with V-shaped grates as well as park and campground grates.

These Cable Organizer Clips With Built-In Magnets

Keep your cords neatly accessible and stored using these clever cable clip organizers. They come in a multicolored pack of five and feature built-in magnets at each end to create a secure hold. The flexible silicone material wraps around cables easily and they can even be used to affix important lists and pictures to your fridge.

A Helpful Jewelry Tool That Helps You Clasp Pieces On Your Own

Since bracelets can be annoyingly hard to put on without help, this bracelet helper tool allows you the freedom to do it alone. The tool grasps one end of the bracelet in one hand while the other hand handles the clasp. It’s small and portable, making it great for travel, and it comes in six different colors to choose from.

A Collapsible Colander That Stores In A Small Footprint

If your kitchen real estate is at a premium, you need this collapsible colander that needs a minimum of storage space. It features a 5-quart capacity and is perfect for draining your pasta or washing produce. Heat-resistant up to 302 degrees Fahrenheit, the dishwasher-safe strainer folds down flat to be tucked away easily inside a cabinet.

This Toilet Paper Storage Basket That’s So Discreet

This toilet paper storage basket is such a genius way to store extra TP without leaving it in sight. Easily stock up to up 12 toilet paper rolls in the corner of your bathroom, or tuck this basket under your sink. It comes in a few colors to match your bathroom.

This 7-Day Set Of Makeup Erasers That Each Come With Their Own Little Pouch

With this set of seven-day makeup erasers, you can remove your makeup every day of the week by just adding water. That’s right — no makeup remover or harsh chemicals are required to effectively remove mascara, eyeliner, foundation, lipstick, sunscreen, and more. The small towels come with a mesh bag for throwing in the washing machine.

These Hair Fibers For Thicker Hair

With a built-in applicator that so many reviewers call “genius,” this hair fiber powder is easy to apply to add a little extra coverage to your hairline. The stain-proof formula works for 48 hours and comes in 14 different shades to match your hair color.

This Wooden Tissue Box Cover With An Antique Aesthetic

This wooden tissue box cover looks like three antique books and makes for a fun piece of decor to add to an office, library, or den. Of course, it also holds tissues, which is nice. If your tissue box doesn’t fit, you can remove them from their cardboard box and set them in the wooden box that way.

This Whimsical Toothpick Holder That Makes A Great Gift

Well, this toothpick holder might be the cutest, most unique toothpick holder of all time. The whimsical holder features a small deer standing in the middle of toothpicks, making it look like a deer in a meadow. It makes for a great novelty gift for deer lovers or to bring some silliness to a gift exchange.

A Space-Saving Spoon Rest & Pot Lid Holder

Adding this multifunctional spoon rest to your kitchen tools will allow you to put your cooking utensils down without dirtying the countertop. In addition to spoons and other utensils like spatulas, the organizer can also hold pot lids. It’s also foldable, saving space when stored. It also comes in green and white.

An AirTag Holder For Your Dog’s Collar To Easily Track Their Location

Give yourself immense peace of mind with this AirTag holder that attaches to your dog’s collar. It’s made of weather-resistant, flexible silicone and slides onto the collar with the ability to easily fit over large buckles. Available in a range of colors, it will keep the AirTag secure without causing any discomfort to your pup.

A Lip Scrub Brush To Exfoliate Delicate Skin

If you’re dealing with dryness and a rough texture, opt for this lip scrub brush that will gently exfoliate dead skin. It features a double-sided design with small scrubbers on one side for sloughing away skin and larger ones on the other for delivering a soothing massage. Made of soft silicone, the scrubber comes in a pack of two and is additionally great for boosting blood flow.

This Set Of 3 Ice Ball Molds For Whiskey

You deserve the perfect whiskey drink or cocktail, and with this set of ice ball molds, you’ll be on your way to achieving that. The orange molds make sphere-shaped ice that melts slower than regular ice cubes, and their durable plastic base is designed to prevent spills. At the end of the night, they’re easy to clean. Three molds come in the set, and they also come in blue.

An Herb Scissors Set With A 5-Blade Design

Quickly prepare cilantro, chives, parsley, and more for your cooking or garnishes using this herb scissors set. It features a five-blade design made of stainless steel to efficiently cut herbs and includes a brush for cleaning between the blades. A cover is also provided for storage as is an additional accessory for quickly prepping leafy greens.

A Washer Door Prop To Keep Your Tub From Getting Musty

If your washer is starting to smell a tad on the musty side, you need this washer door prop to keep it open just enough to let air circulate. It’s designed for front-loading washers and is made of a flexible but firm hose with a magnetic end that attaches to the side. Bend the hose as needed to wrap around the washer door and keep it securely open for a fresh-smelling tub.

This Sturdy Floating Bookshelf You Can’t Even See

This floating bookshelf is so inconspicuous, it makes stacked books look as if they are actually floating against a wall. The small, L-shaped shelf can hold up to 15 pounds, but the company also sells a larger shelf that can hold more books, photos, or whatever you want displayed. Mounting hardware is included, so you can set it up right out of the box.

This Onion Holder That Makes Slicing A Breeze

Easily grip onto whichever vegetable you’re chopping with this genius gadget. This works particularly well on veggies you’re planning to thin slice, like onions, potatoes for fries, or bell peppers. It even works for slicing meat!

This Untippable Nail Polish Holder With An Adjustable Angle

If at-home manicures are your thing, you’ve gotta try this untippable nail polish holder. The silicone holder grips any smooth, flat surface and legitimately doesn’t tip over, plus it securely holds onto any size nail polish bottle. It’s the best way to paint your own nails without having to hold the nail polish bottle while you do it.

A Water-Resistant Travel Shoe Bag

This 4.7-star-rated travel shoe bag is great for those on the move as it’s made with water-resistant polyester and TPU material. It comes in a set of two and is made of see-through mesh material and includes a strong zipper for a secure closure. Available in eight colors, it includes a convenient handle at the top to carry the bag with ease.

]]><![CDATA[65 Comfy, Best-Selling Pieces On Amazon That You'll Wear All The Time]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/shopping/comfy-best-selling-pieces-on-amazon-that-youll-wear-all-the-timehttps://www.scarymommy.com/shopping/comfy-best-selling-pieces-on-amazon-that-youll-wear-all-the-timeSun, 15 Dec 2024 11:00:25 GMT
Amazon

Get ready, we’ve been following the trends and they led us to a ton of brilliant wardrobe essentials that elevate your look without sacrificing comfort. From crop tops and bodysuits to sweatpants that look like jeans and jeans that feel like sweatpants, we’ve found 65 of the comfiest clothes that Amazon cannot keep on their digital shelves. Seriously.

Sherpa-Lined Joggers With A Drawstring Waist

Perfect for the cold months, these cute joggers are lined with a super plush sherpa fleece that’s so warm and cozy, you’ll never want to take them off. They have a ribbed, drawstring waist, and ribbed elastic ankle hems to retain heat inside the sweatpants while still staying breathable and modernly stylish.

  • Available colors: 11
  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large

Stylish Ribbed Crew Socks In A Bunch Of Neutral Colors

These aesthetic ribbed crew socks come in all kinds of neutral colors — from white and black to different shades of brown — so you can get onto the crew sock trend with any outfit you like. They’re made of high-quality cotton that’s breathable and skin-friendly, with reinforced toes and heels for extra support.

  • Available sets: 5
  • Available sizes: 5-9 — 9-11

Stretchy & Squat-Proof Leggings With 65,000 5-Star Ratings

These wildly comfortable, wildly popular high-waisted leggings can easily go up against your favorite designer brand when it comes to comfort, thickness, and elasticity. They’re buttery soft and feature a four-way stretch that makes them thick and flexible to give you full coverage so you can squat without wardrobe malfunctions.

  • Available colors: 22
  • Available sizes: One Size — One Size Plus

A Fitted Crop Top Available In A Ton Of Colors

Made of a spandex blend that’s form-fitting and stretchy, this shirt can be worn with sweats to lounge around the house or with a leather skirt to go out. It’s lightweight and super soft, with a fitted style that’s cropped to go with high-waisted jeans or show a little skin with low-waisted pants. It has a crew neck, long sleeves, and comes in a ton of colors.

  • Available colors: 33
  • Available sizes: XX-Small — XX-Large

A Long-Sleeve Jumpsuit With A Smocked Square Neck

This is a classic jumpsuit you can wear to anything — from a night on the town to a family birthday party to a backyard barbecue. It has long sleeves that are cinched at the bottom, a chic square neck, a smocked bust, pleated waist, and long, wide-leg pants for a ton of texture and movement. Plus, it has two side pockets, which add to its comfortability.

  • Available colors: 10
  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large

A Trendy Cargo Midi Skirt That Reviewers Liken To A Blanket

Get onto the new cargo trend but in an elevated way with this midi skirt. It has all the classic traits of cargo apparel—tons of pockets, both open and with flap closures—but it’s so easy to just pull on and wear; one reviewer wrote, “this skirt is like wearing a blanket to work.” It hits mid-calf and has an elastic waistband that’s super comfortable and won’t dig.

  • Available colors: 4
  • Available sizes: Small — Large

A Ribbed Sweater Dress With A Square Neck

This sweater dress is so versatile — you can wear it to casual parties, brunch with friends, or work. It has a ribbed texture with tiered hems in the skirt, lantern sleeves, and slightly puffed shoulders for tons of volume and fun. It has a super chic square neck and a babydoll style that’s form-fitting to the waist and then loose to the knee, making it oh-so cozy.

  • Available colors: 20
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

Breathable Seamless Thongs With Over 52,000 Raving Fans

With over 52,000 five-star ratings, these seamless thongs are a wardrobe essential to replace all your old, ratty undies. They’re made with a nylon body that’s stretchy and has a no-show style no matter what bottoms your’re wearing. There’s a reinforced cotton crotch for added comfort, and they come in a bunch of colors.

  • Available sets: 10
  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large

Buttery Soft Pajama Pants With A Wide Drawstring Waist

These pajama pants are an instant “add to cart” for a cozy and warm night’s sleep. They’re long with a wide- cut leg and extra wide drawstring waistband for extra comfort. Best of all, they’re soft and stretchy, which is great for tossing and turning without getting stuck tangled. They come in a ton of colors and patterns for all your sleepy moods.

  • Available colors: 46
  • Available sizes: Small — 3X-Large

A Beyond-Soft Oversized Tee That’s Great With Leggings

Pair this oversized tee with leggings or biker shorts, and you’ll master that casual chic look while you’re working out, walking around, or grabbing a coffee. It has a loose crewneck, drop shoulders, extra-long sleeves, and it comes in a ton of colors to go with all your favorite athleisure.

  • Available colors: 25
  • Available sizes: Small — 3X-Large

A Long Sleeve Sweatshirt Dress With An A-Line Silhouette

This long-sleeve sweatshirt dress has a crew-style neckline with a pleated drop skirt that adds some dressiness and movement to the otherwise casual, cozy piece. Its’s so versatile — pair it with sneakers for running errands or boots and earrings for a night on the town.

  • Available colors: 15
  • Available sizes: X-Small — X-Large

Canvas Ballet Flats With A Memory Foam Footbed

These classic ballet flat-style slip-on sneakers have a 100% canvas upper that’s machine-washable to keep them looking good as new for years to come. They have a memory foam footbed for added comfort and are from fan-favorite brand Skechers, so you know you’re getting quality.

  • Available colors: 17
  • Available sizes: 5 — 11 (also in wide)

Long Sleeve Square Neck Bodysuits That Go With Everything

A classic long-sleeve bodysuit is a wardrobe essential because of how versatile it is. Layer it under blazers and sweaters for the chillier months, or wear with shorts in the warmer months. They have a chic square neck, thick, opaque fabric design, and a snap button crotch closure to easily get in and out of it.

  • Available sets: 25
  • Available sizes: Small — X-Large

A Waffle Knit Sweater With Long Baloon Sleeves

This oversized top is as lightweight as a T-shirt but has a waffle knit design that makes it feel and look like an upscale sweater. It has a boat neckline, a dropped shoulder, and large balloon sleeves which all contribute to the slouchy, loose, relaxed style that’s effortlessly cool.

  • Available colors: 12
  • Available sizes: Small — X-Large

A Cropped Shacket In A Bunch Of Flannel Colors

This shacket manages to blend so many styles into one. It’s both a shirt and a jacket, depending on the season, and it has the classic flannel design but it’s cropped to go with more outfits. It has two chest pockets, a button-front closure, a thick collar, and it comes in a bunch of super cute and cozy colorways.

  • Available colors: 9
  • Available sizes: Small — X-Large

A Soft, High Neck Top With Pretty Lace Sleeves

This top has chic lace sleeves that add texture and dimension to the otherwise classic shirt. It has a crew neck and a pleated bust design that’s eye-catching and cool. It has the perfect length to be worn tucked in or out, and it has tapered wrists so you can push the sleeves slightly up if you want that option.

  • Available colors: 26
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

Leak-Proof Period Underwear That Absorbs Up To 4 Tampons’ Worth

If you want to try out period underwear without spending big bucks, these undies are for you. They have a four-layer design — including a front-to-back leakproof later that’s breathable, moisture wicking, and super soft, all while absorbing up to four tampons’ worth of liquid. And they’re machine-washable to easily clean between wears.

  • Available colors: 1
  • Available sizes: XX-Small — 3X

An Oversized Sweatshirt Made Of Soft & Warm Cotton Blend Fabric

This oversized sweatshirt is a must-have in everyone’s closet whether you’re lounging at home in your comfies or heading out on a coffee walk. It has a crew neck, trendy loose fit, and a drop shoulder collar. It’s made of a super soft cotton blend that’s lightweight yet warm and cozy.

  • Available colors: 17
  • Available sizes: Small — X-Large

Fleece Lined Tights That Are Sheer & Super Warm

When you want to wear dresses or skirts in the colder months but need to keep your legs warm, these fleece-lined tights are exactly what you need. They look like normal, sheer tights and you’d never guess they’re lined with really soft fleece that retains your heat while blocking the cold.

  • Available sets: 16
  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large

A Mock Neck Swing Dress Made Of Stretchy Cotton Fabric

This swing dress has an effortlessly chic look, where the mock neck and short sleeves perfectly balance out the extra short length for an elevated and high-end-looking dress. It has a loose-fitting design that falls straight down which makes it so versatile — wear it with sneakers and a jean jacket, or heels and hoops.

  • Available colors: 20
  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large

Flared Yoga Pants With A Buttery Soft Fabric & High-Waist Fit

If you’re looking for ultimate comfort and style, check out these flared yoga pants. They’re made of a spandex blend material so they’re super stretchy and buttery soft, but they’re thick enough to not be see-through when you bend down. They have a high waist and a flared end that’s very in right now.

  • Available colors: 10
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

An Oversized V-Neck Cardigan With Dropped Shoulders

If you ask me, this cardigan is an instant “add to cart” in multiple colors. It has a ribbed knit design and an oversized fit that hits below the hip that gives off cool and casual vibes. It has a V-neck with a button front closure and dropped shoulders for a slouchy but polished look.

  • Available colors: 18
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

Best-Selling High, Slouchy Socks For Casual Or Fancy Looks

The coolest part about these socks is that they have a unique slouchy design so you can adjust the length and height to be exactly what you want. They’re soft, stretchy, and comfortable with extra cushioning around the toe, heel, and bottom for more support.

  • Available sets: 5
  • Available sizes: One Size

A V-Neck Maxi Dress With A Faux Wrap-Style Waist

Between the glamorous V-neck, faux wrap-style, cinched empire waist, pleated front, and long, flowy skirt, this maxi dress looks so expensive but won’t break the bank. It comes in a ton of colors and patterns, and it’s super versatile — great for all seasons and can be dressed up or down.

  • Available colors: 27
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

A Chic, Thick Mock Turtleneck Top With Half Sleeves

Elevate your T-shirt game and replace your go-to with this polished mock neck for a chic and casual look that’s super comfortable. It fits like a classic tee, with a cool high neck, short sleeves, and a length that can be tucked in or out. It’s the perfect versatile shirt to dress up with a slip skirt and booties or dress down with ripped jeans and sneakers.

  • Available colors: 31
  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large

A Sweater Set With Contrasting Color Hems

If you want to look polished while still wearing a cozy sweater set, this one’s for you. It’s the contrasting color hems that make this one stand out and instantly elevate your look. The top has short sleeves with a side split hem and a crew neck. And the long pants have an elastic waistband and high-waisted fit for optimal comfort.

  • Available colors: 9
  • Available sizes: X-Small — X-Large

Classic Tapered Jeans With 47,000 5-Star Ratings

Shoppers love these jeans both because of the style and quality — especially at such a budget-friendly price. They come in dozens of washes to go with any outfit and they have a classic high-rise style that fits snug through the hip and then falls straight down for ease of wear. It has an easy zipper fly and belt loops to accessorize.

  • Available colors: 97
  • Available sizes: 2 — 24 (short, long, plus)

A Puff Sleeve Shirt Made Of Soft, Knitted Material

Swap out your everyday shirt for this puff sleeve top, and it can instantly elevate a casual look with jeans, or make you look exceptionally polished when paired with leather pants. It’s made of soft knitted material that reviewers love and has chic ribbed details on the V-neck, sleeves, and bottom hem.

  • Available colors: 10
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

A Highly Rated Knitted Beanie With A Toasty Folded Brim

Who says keeping warm can’t also be a fashion statement? This chic knit beanie proves that wrong entirely. Not only is it stretchy, warm, and thick, but it has a stunning knit design with a folded brim that adds a ton of extra warmth around your ears and forehead. And who can forget that poof on top? It’s no wonder why this has a 4.7-star rating on Amazon.

  • Available colors: 18
  • Available sizes: One Size

A Stunning Wool Skirt With An A-Line Style

Does this long wool skirt not look like something Kate Middleton would wear? It has an elegant long, A-line style with an asymmetrical hem in stunning classic tartan designs. It has a high elastic waist and a pull-on closure with a hidden zipper so it looks totally seamless while being super comfy.

  • Available colors: 9
  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large

Classic Slim Fit Tank Tops With A Trendy Scoop Neck

Tank tops like these classic ones are a wardrobe must-have because they’re comfortable and go with everything — dressed up or dressed down. They’re made of super soft cotton with ribbed designs and scoop necks. They’re great for layering, whether under sweatshirts or leather blazers.

  • Available sets: 42
  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large

A Soft & Flowy Tunic Dress With Cute Button Details

This sweater dress drapes on your body in a way that’s elegant and upscale while remaining comfy and versatile. It has long sleeves, a loose crew neck, and a knee-length hem, which are all classically cozy. It can be paired with leggings or tights and boots in the winter or sandals in the summer.

  • Available colors: 22
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

Stretchy Leggings That Look Just Like Jeans

Elevate your leggings collection and look like you’re wearing jeans without sacrificing comfort and style. These have a skinny jean fit that’s snug from hip to ankle with a mid-rise waist. They’re made of super soft and stretchy fabric that looks like denim but gives you all-day comfort. Plus, they have a wide waistband and faux pockets for added classic appeal.

  • Available colors: 13
  • Available sizes: 0 — 24 (short, long, plus)

Classic Everyday Sneakers In A Bunch Of Go-To Colors

These classic everyday sneakers are about to become your go-to pair whether you’re running errands, heading to a backyard BBQ, hitting the town, or going to a casual dinner. They’re super versatile and come in a ton of easy-to-wear colors like white, khaki, and black. Plus, they have cushioned insoles and a thick upper that offer a ton of support.

  • Available colors: 28
  • Available sizes: 6 — 13

A Sporty Sleep Shirt That Reviewers Love

Introducing your new favorite pajamas: this sleep shirt that shoppers are absolutely loving right now. It has oversized sleeves with drop shoulders, a V-neck, and an asymmetrical bottom hem. They fit nice and loose so you don’t feel confined while you’re sleeping. And they have a cool jersey-inspired design.

  • Available colors: 35
  • Available sizes: Small — 4X-Large

Loose-Fitting Corduroy Pants With A Drawstring Waistband

These pants combine the classic corduroy design with the comfort of sweatpants for an elevated look you can wear while lounging. They have a drawstring waistband and a slightly stretchy tapered design that fits loosely. They have two deep side pockets and the bottoms can be worn long or rolled up, adding to the cute, casual vibe.

  • Available colors: 15
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

A Mock Turtleneck Bodysuit With 36,000 5-Star Ratings

Made from a soft and stretchy rayon and spandex blend, this bodysuit is breathable, lightweight, and a super versatile addition to your wardrobe. The mock turtleneck style is elevated and polished, making you look sleek and put-together whether it’s paired with jeans, trousers, or a slip skirt.

  • Available colors: 35
  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large

A Slouchy Jumpsuit With A Scoop Neck & Racer Back Fit

This jumpsuit fits slouchy and loosely, which are exactly the words you want describing clothing this comfortable and cozy. With a scoop neck, adjustable spaghetti straps, and a racer back design, the top is all comfort. Meanwhile, the jumpsuit has two side pockets and wide legs for a breezy feel. It’s great for layering — wear over a long sleeve shirt or under a fun jacket or blazer.

  • Available colors: 24
  • Available sizes: Small — 4X-Large

A Classic Cotton Blend Crewneck Sweatshirt From Hanes

Shopping are loving this sweatshirt because it gives you the comfort and quality you can expect from fan-favorite brand Hanes with a wildly budget-friendly price. Made with a warm cotton blend, this sweatshirt has a crewneck, pullover design, and ribbed details on the collar, cuffs, and waistband.

  • Available colors: 11
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

Stretchy Leggings With A Toasty Fleece Lining

Whether you’re working out or relaxing during the chilly months, make sure you’re as warm as possible with these fleece-lined leggings. They’re super stretchy, water-resistant, and sweat-wicking, so they keep you comfortable too — not just warm. Plus they have three deep pockets, adding to their usefulness and sporty style.

  • Available colors: 30
  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large

Lacy Underwear With A Stretchy, Seamless Fit

We’ve found your new favorite undies, and you’re going to want to pick these sets up in every single color. They have a hipster fit with a stunning lace trim and back that’s seamless, stretchy, and won’t roll down or pinch the skin. It also has a double layered cotton crotch area for extra support, yet reviewers note they’re comfy all over.

  • Available sets: 5
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

A Coordinated 2-Piece Lounge Set With Super Deep Pockets

This extra cozy lounge set manages to be lightweight, stretchy, and comfortable while keeping you totally warm when it’s chilly. The top has long sleeves, a wide boat neck, and a chest pocket. Meanwhile, the long pants have a tapered ankle, deep pockets, and a drawstring waist to adjust the fit to you.

  • Available colors: 12
  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large

A Cropped Puffer Vest With A High Neck & Zippered Pockets

Cropped puffer vests are all the rage right now, so get onto the trend without breaking the bank with this one that comes in over a dozen colors. It has a high neck, a sturdy front zipper closure, and multiple zippered pockets for all your essentials. And it has a drawstring hemline to get the perfect fit.

  • Available colors: 14
  • Available sizes: X-Small — X-Large

A Flowy Mini Dress With Long Lantern Sleeves & A Surprise Open Back

This mini dress has long, lantern sleeves that drape over your arms in the most elegant, polished way. It has a ruched bust with a smocked empire waist, a square neck, and a tiered bottom hemline to make it loose and comfortable. The back is also stunning with a low hem and a bow closure that’s absolutely adorable.

  • Available colors: 20
  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large

Thick Crew Socks That Are Great To Wear With Comfy Boots

Keep your feet and toes warm and comfortable with these crew-length socks. Great to wear with boots, the socks have elastic bands at the ankle to fit snug but comfortably, retaining heat to stay dry and comfortable. They’re super thick, with reinforced toes for added durability and long-lasting style.

  • Available sets: 19
  • Available sizes: One Size

Wide-Leg Palazzo Pants With 30,000 5-Star Ratings

Between the wide leg style, the ultra wide waistband, and the flowy fit, these palazzo pants are effortlessly chic. They have two faux pockets in the back so you have the look of trousers without adding any bulk. And they come in a ton of amazing colors and patterns from polka dots and florals to everyday solids.

  • Available colors: 56
  • Available sizes: Small — 3X-Large

A Lightweight Cotton Blend Crewneck Sweater With A Classic Fit

Made of a soft cotton blend, this crewneck sweater is lightweight, breathable, and stretchy. Great for layering, the sweater has a close but comfortable fit from the shoulder to the hip. It has a wide crewneck with a length that’s great for tucking or wearing loose. Plus, it comes in dozens of colors and patterns, so you can stock up.

  • Available colors: 37
  • Available sizes: X-Small — 6X

Memory Foam Slippers That Reviewers Are Obsessed With

Nearly 9,000 shoppers gave these memory foam slippers a five-star rating because of how comfortable, stylish, and designer-looking they are. They have a faux fur lining that’s so cozy with thick, memory foam cushioning that feels like walking on a cloud. Plus, these have a thick rubber sole that’s sturdy and nonslip.

  • Available colors: 9
  • Available sizes: 5.5-6 — 11.5-12

A Casual Lounge Set That Is Neither Too Warm Or Cold

The greatest part about a lounge set like this one is that it’s super casual and comfortable but also instantly makes you look polished and put together. The top has batwing sleeves, a crew neck, and tapered wrists to help insulate. And the matching shorts have an elastic waistband and two deep pockets.

  • Available colors: 12
  • Available sizes: Small — X-Large

A 3-Pack Of Soft & Stretchy Ribbed Bodysuits With Cool Square Necks

Don’t sleep on these bodysuits that give designer vibes without the designer prices. The set of three comes in dozens of color combinations so you can get the exact shades you’re looking for. They have a hot scooped neck, ribbed design, and wide-set straps that add a simple but eye-catching touch.

  • Available sets: 30
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

Buckled Clog With Memory Foam Soles & Cork Footbeds

The slip-on buckle clog-style shoe is absolutely everywhere right now, and these are a great option that gives you the look of your favorite brand without spending big bucks. They have a memory foam sole with a vegan suede upper and a metal buckle. They have the classic cork footbed with a lightweight outsole that’s nonslip and stable.

  • Available colors: 15
  • Available sizes: 5 — 12 (also in wide)

A Warm Tunic With A Cool Twisted Front

What makes this otherwise classic sweater unique is the unique twist front that adds some eye-catching texture and dimension to your outfit that gives the look of a fancy French tuck without the bulky excess fabric. It has a crew neck, long sleeves, and a slightly stretchy feel. It goes great with jeans and sneakers to run errands or leather pants and boots for a night on the town.

  • Available colors: 37
  • Available sizes: Small — 3X-Large

Super Stretchy No-Show Undies With A Low, Seamless Waistband

These no-show undies have the quality and seamless design of designer brands but for a steal of a price. Made of a nylon and elastic blend, the underwear are laser cut so they’re totally seamless and won’t show through leggings or pants. They have a low waist that won’t roll down and a reinforced cotton crotch for added comfort.

  • Available sets: 17
  • Available sizes: X-Small — 6X

A Super Soft & Oversized Quarter-Zip Sweatshirt

This oversized quarter-zip sweatshirt has long sleeves and a drop shoulder collar that’s so comfy and cozy. Made of a cotton blend, the sweatshirt is so ridiculously plush inside and comes in dozens of colors so you can look your best whether you’re watching a movie, working out, or heading to brunch.

  • Available colors: 26
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

Crew Socks With Adorable Scalloped Ends

With a patterned ribbed design, crew length, and adorable scalloped hems, these socks are so trendy right now you’re going to want to wear them with every outfit. They’re not only cute, though, they’re also functional with reinforced toes and a breathable design that keeps you dry all day long.

  • Available colors: 3
  • Available sizes: One Size

Pull-On Bootcut Jeans From Fan-Favorite Brand Levi Strauss

If you want the look of jeans and fit with the comfy and cozy feel of leggings, these jeans are for you. They have the quality you know to expect from fan-favorite brand Levi Strauss & Co., and they have a pull-on waistband that’s so comfortable and makes them easy to just toss on and go. They even have two small functional pockets on the front.

  • Available colors: 4
  • Available sizes: 2 — 28 (long, short, plus long, plus short)

Silky Satin Pajamas With Eye-Catching Contrasting Hems

Good luck not adding every single color of these pajamas to your cart after you see how pretty and comfortable they are. They’re made of satin which is buttery soft, oh-so smooth, and great for your skin. The top has long sleeves, a V-neck, front button panel, and notch collar. The pants have a loose fit and an elastic waistband. And they both have contrasting color hems that adds some classic eye-catching details.

  • Available colors: 39
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

A Sleek Maxi Skirt With A Wide, Fold-Over Waistband

With a wide, fold-over waistband, pleated design throughout, pockets, and a long maxi length, this skirt is so easy to wear because it’s so comfy and soft. It’s an essential addition to your wardrobe to wear with a bodysuit and a leather jacket to happy hour or a sweater and sneakers for a grocery shopping run. It comes in a ton of colors and patterns — from florals to solids.

  • Available colors: 22
  • Available sizes: Small — 4X-Large

A Henley Shirt With A Ribbed Scoop Neck

A henley like this one is the kind of wardrobe staple that elevates a classic white tee while staying comfy and casual. This one has delicate practical buttons on the bust and wrists. It has a ribbed design for added texture and a scoop neck that’s super cute and great for showing off your layered necklaces.

  • Available colors: 27
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

A Best-Selling Thong Bodysuit With Super Stretchy Sculpting Fabric

There’s a reason that nearly 23,000 people have given this bodysuit five stars, and that’s because it sculpts and snatches without sacrificing moveable comfort. It has adjustable straps and a thong design with a snap bottom closure that makes it easy to take off and put on. It’s made of super stretchy fabric that’s moisture wicking, tightening, and breathable all at the same time.

  • Available colors: 11
  • Available sizes: XXS/XS — 4XL

A Plush Robe Made Of Super Shaggy Fleece

If you’re not lounging around your home in a robe like a Victorian-era queen, you need to get this bestseller and treat yourself. It’s made of super plush and shaggy fleece that’s so cozy you’re never going to want to take it off. It has a fold-over collar, two deep pockets, and a waist strap you can adjust for the perfect fit.

  • Available colors: 14
  • Available sizes: Small-Medium — 2X-3X

A Pleated Blouse With Ruffled Wrist Cuffs

With a pleated front and adorably delicate ruffles around the wrists, this shirt is a simple staple that you can wear with almost anything. Great for so many different occasions, this blouse has a loose fit that’s great tucked in or out, and even feature slightly puff sleeves. Plus, it comes in a ton of colors and patterns.

  • Available colors: 21
  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large

An A-Line Midi Skirt With Delicate Pleats

Whether you’re headed to a family party, happy hour, work, or brunch, this pleated midi skirt with help you look amazing. It has a high, super stretchy waistband that can easily be worn with a belt to jazz up your outfit. It has a flared fit with chiffon pleats throughout to keep things cute yet comfy. It has an inner lining so it’s not see-through, and it goes with almost any kind of top.

  • Available colors: 37
  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large

Classic Clogs From Everyone’s Favorite Brand: Crocs

Trends come and go in waves, but these clogs from Crocs have persisted. The unisex shoe is lightweight, breathable, and comfortable, giving you support all day long. The ventilation holes not only keep your feet dry, but they also help shed debris and water so nothing gets stuck inside.

  • Available colors: 67
  • Available sizes: 4 — 18 women; 2 — 17 men

A Best-Selling Batwing Sweater With Cool Exposed Seams

This oversized sweater is so ridiculously cozy and comes in so many colors and patterns, you’re going to want to stock up. It has all the classic attributes of your new favorite sweater: a thick crew neck, ribbed detailing, batwing sleeves, side split hemline, and oversized fit. And on top of that, it has super cool exposed seams for some added texture.

  • Available colors: 36
  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large
]]><![CDATA[60 Flattering Outfits Under $35 That Are So Bougie & Chic]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/shopping/flattering-outfits-under-35-that-are-so-bougie-chichttps://www.scarymommy.com/shopping/flattering-outfits-under-35-that-are-so-bougie-chicSat, 14 Dec 2024 22:30:24 GMT

Contrary to popular belief, bougie looks aren’t just about spending a ton of money on a look — there are lots of pieces with special details that also happen to be attainable. This list has rounded up 60 flattering outfits under $35 that are so bougie and chic, you’ll want to snap them up immediately. Athleisure pieces that look like you snagged them at a pricey boutique, going-out looks that look designer, and shockingly chic accessories — this list has must-have pieces that take you through a range of activities, so you can look high-end all week long. Scroll on to shop the round-up.

A Funnel Neck Sweater In A Honeycomb Cable Knit

The unique honeycomb pattern of this cable knit sweater gives this Amazon Essentials turtleneck a luxe, modern look — and shoppers rave that the cotton blend feels so soft. A funnel neckline and wide ribbed cuffs keep you cozy on chilly days, while the easy fit looks effortless but not bulky; an easy “add to cart.”

  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 11

Straight-Leg Pants That Look Polished But Are So Stretchy

Two patch front pockets and a high pull-on waist accented by decorative buttons lend these pants vintage flair in the best possible way. The leg falls somewhere between straight and wide, adding to the trousers’ timeless appeal — and it doesn’t hurt that the buttery fabric has 20% spandex for ultra-comfy lounging, errand-running, and more.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 4

A Paperclip Chain For Building The Perfect Necklace Stack

An essential of the modern jewelry collection, this paperclip chain choker looks chic on its own — but it’s ideal for building the perfect necklace stack. Plated in 14-karat gold, the shockingly accessible 15-inch necklace features a 3-inch extender, so you can adjust the length to accommodate existing chains in your rotation.

  • Available colors: 4

Low-Key Spicy Leather-Look Leggings

Not only can these leggings withstand an active workout — they’re blended with an ultra-high percentage of stretch — the leather-look fabric is also low-key spicy for nights out. They’re designed with a high waist and a gusseted crotch for the ultimate in comfort. Stylish, high-quality, and this pair look good on everyone: Say less.

  • Available sizes: XX-Small — X-Large
  • Available colors: 11

A Bougie Knit Sweater With A Polo Collar

With its bougie polo collar and striped cuffs, this split-neck sweater is effortlessly chic — and it won’t stress out your bank account. The cable-knit design is crafted from soft fibers in a fit that’s neither tight or loose, so you can layer it over a tank without adding bulk on the coldest days.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 18

A Gold-Plated Bracelet Set That Looks Carefully Curated

Plated in 14-karat gold, this bracelet set adds a high-quality gleam to your wrist — and the varying textures of the five included bracelets looks carefully chosen. Each chain features a 2-inch extender for a customized fit; mix in other bracelets from your collection to really personalize the look.

  • Available styles: 23

A Tunic Blouse That Drapes Beautifully

In spite of its accessible price, this tunic blouse comes off as high-end thanks to the drape of its sleek fabric. The billowy silhouette features a pleated mock neckline and short sleeves with a unique split up the middle — so you can show a little skin while still remaining workplace-appropriate.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 18

Wide-Leg Trousers That Shoppers Can’t Stop Buying

Shoppers can’t stop buying these pants; over 13,000 fans have given them a perfect rating. The wide-leg silhouette is crafted from flowing fabric with a pleated hook-and-eye front, for a tailored aesthetic that’s unquestionably bougie. A elasticized back keeps the fit deliciously comfy.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — 2X-Large (including select short and tall sizes)
  • Available colors: 29

A Roomy Tote Bag That’ll Become Your Go-To

Crafted from luxe, buttery faux leather, this tote bag looks far pricier than it is — and the oversized design will surely make it your new everyday and travel go-to. It’s got enough room to pack everything you need for a commute to the office or weekend away, and the magnetic snap closure makes it easy to access contents, so it’d be an ideal carry-on bag.

  • Available colors: 8

An Elegant Satin Midi Skirt You’ll Wear All Year Long

In lustrous satin, this midi skirt signals luxury in spite of its budget-friendly price. Sophisticated and comfy, the high-waisted design features a hidden elastic waistband; its below-the-knee length makes it a year-round classic that can pair with everything from strappy sandals to tall boots.

  • Available sizes: Small — 3X-Large
  • Available colors: 26

A Smooth-As-Butter Workout Jacket

Designed with a generous percentage of stretch, this workout jacket is smooth as butter — and brims with expensive-looking features. A high mock neckline and zip front allow you to control the amount of coverage.The bodycon fit is easily layered under heavier jackets, and thumb holes help keep the sleeves in place when you do.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — X-Large
  • Available colors: 12

A Cargo Skirt That Puts A High-Fashion Twist On Workwear

Cargo pants have become a staple of Gen Z styles; this cargo maxi skirt puts a high-fashion twist on the workwear-inspired silhouette. Two decorative flap front pockets and a buttoned waistband deliver the cargo-pant energy while the front slit at the center dresses up the look, which can easily go street style or elegant.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 9

A Longline Sports Bra With Sculpted Seaming

It’s not merely the longline design that helps this sports bra double as a workout top; the high scoop neckline and chic seaming look like details meant to be shown off. Plenty of stretch and wide racerback straps ensure plenty of support for virtually all cup sizes.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 12

A Striped Maxi Shirt Dress That’s So Old Money

Even though it’s crafted with a maxi length and oversized fit, there’s nothing sloppy about this shirt dress — the tailored collar and buttoned front combine with a preppy striped print to keep the look structured. Dolman sleeves add to the intentionally slouchy appeal; paired with a sleek sandal and gold bangles or tall boots and a blazer, the look is so old money.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large
  • Available colors: 5

A Button-Down Shirt With Eye-Catching Details

Proof that you don’t have to spend a lot for a bougie aesthetic, this blouse is designed with wide cuffs and bloused sleeves, in an eye-catching print. Combined with the smooth fabric and classic collar, the piece transforms even simple denim into a statement; try sizing up for an artsy, ultra blouse-y fit.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 24

Wide-Leg Pants That’ll Upgrade Your WFH Wardrobe

With a high paper-bag waist accented by a chic tie, these wide leg pants have more than enough structure for the workplace — but the soft fabric and billowy fit feel more like loungewear. They’re a definite upgrade for your WFH wardrobe, and the pull-on design is easily dressed up with heels and a silk tank for cocktails.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large
  • Available colors: 45

A Cable Knit Sweater Vest For Your Preppy Aesthetic

A versatile addition to any wardrobe, this sweater vest features wide tank sleeves and a V-neckline, in a roomy silhouette — so it can double as a standalone top or a chic layering piece. The cable-knit details and ribbed trim help hone your new prep aesthetic at an ultra budget-friendly price point.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 30

A Shockingly Sophisticated Onesie

A one-and-done onesie becomes shockingly sophisticated when designed with a sharp square neckline and an on-trend bootcut leg. The long-sleeved silhouette is crafted from luxe, stretchy fabric that’ll keep its shape — so you can style it as a base layer or standalone outfit and look polished either way.

  • Available sizes: Small — X-Large
  • Available colors: 7

A Birthstone Pendant To Personalize Your Necklace Stack

Add a personalized touch to your necklace stack with this pendant, which features a glittering rectangular cubic zirconia that dangles from a chain plated in real 14-karat gold. Available in colors to represent each month, this luxe minimalist necklace also happens to be extremely accessible, so don’t sleep on it.

  • Available colors:12

A Chiffon Bodysuit With A Plunging Neckline

Designed with a bit of stretch, this bodysuit molds to the precise shape of your body, with a plunging neckline highlighted by lush pleats. Structure at the shoulders enhances the tailored aesthetic, while the pull-on design stays in place underneath trousers and skirts.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 23

A Ruffled Blazer For The Office & Beyond

With cropped sleeves and a ruffled hem, this blazer puts a femme twist on the menswear-inspired silhouette — it even darts in a bit at the waist to accentuate your shape. The lapel collar is a nod to the piece’s classic roots; wear it to work over a cami and pencil skirt, then switch to denim for a night out.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 19

A Buttery Ruched Midi Dress That Works For So Many Occasions

Designed with long sleeves and a mock neckline, this sleek midi dress can work for so many occasions, from a day at the office to cocktail parties. The secret lies in the buttery bodycon fabric that’s ruched slightly at the waist; it conforms to the shape of every body shape, creating an understated yet statement-making silhouette.

  • Available sizes: XX-Small — X-Large
  • Available colors: 4

A Maxi Dress With Pockets That Has Shoppers Obsessed

With over 15,000 five-star ratings, it’s clear that this maxi dress has shoppers obsessed. Fitted through the bodice to the elasticized waist, it extends to a flowing skirt with long sleeves and a scoop neckline — workplace-appropriate yet soft enough for lounging, it’s bound to become a wardrobe staple.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 46

A Short-Sleeved Top With Delicate Details

Delicate details like ruffled short sleeves and textured Swiss dot fabric elevate this top; you could easily dress it up with heels. The pleated split neckline helps the piece drape nicely under layers, and it’s designed with an easy fit and hip-length hem that will look elegant whether worn tucked or loose.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large
  • Available colors: 33

A Cozy Plaid Shawl That Brings Back Rustic-Chic

The English country aesthetic is back, and this plaid shawl is a stylish, shockingly accessible way to welcome the trend into your wardrobe. The fringed silhouette is designed with a notch at the neck to help keep the shawl in place on your shoulders, and comes in a variety of plaid prints — you’re sure to find one that works for your tastes.

  • Available sizes: One size
  • Available colors: 23

Satin Pajamas To Elevate Your Bedtime Routine

Elevating your bedtime routine can be as simple as adding in some really luxurious pajamas. Crafted from expensive-feeling satin, this set features contrasting trim for a little menswear-inspired flair. Comprised of a button-down long-sleeved top and elastic waistband pants, this set is an instant sleepy-time upgrade.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large
  • Available colors: 109

Sheer Mesh Patterned Socks That Are Fashion Writer-Approved

I’m obsessed with these socks; the sheer patterned mesh looks cute whether paired with loafers (an important look rn) or poking out of some high-top sneakers. They’re lightweight enough to wear during warm weather, and the unique design makes any outfit stand out — people are always shocked to discover they’re an Amazon find.

  • Available sizes: One size
  • Available colors: 19

A Satin Camisole That Goes From Day To Night

A day-to-night wardrobe essential, this tank is crafted from luscious satin for a look that’s bougie AF. It’s designed with bra-friendly wide straps and a V-neckline that’s chic enough for evening, but not so scandalous that you can’t wear it to work under a jacket.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large
  • Available colors: 16

A Quiet Luxury Cardigan With So Much Styling Potential

In a preppy striped print and soft knit, this cardigan is giving quiet luxury. The easy fit looks good on everyone, layers easily, and two patch front pockets add a little extra structure, so it can work either as a light jacket or a standalone top. With its gold-toned buttons, it makes any outfit look expensive.

  • Available sizes: Small — X-Large
  • Available colors: 7

An Empire Waist Maxi Dress That Looks Amazing On Everyone

Designed with a fitted bodice and flowing skirt, this long-sleeved maxi dress looks good on everyone; the empire waistline and lush stretchy fabric works well on virtually every body type. Backed by over 15,000 five-star ratings, the minimal silhouette can be dressed up or down by swapping slides for a heel — it even has pockets.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 46

A Fringed Scarf That Feels So High-End

Crafted from cashmere-soft fabric, this scarf feels so high end, but you’d never guess that it’s also incredibly obtainable. The fringed design comes in a variety of colorways, although this camel-hued plaid version is hard to beat — and the compact, versatile design can work as a scarf or as a light wrap on long plane flights.

  • Available colors: 41

A Chiffon Blouse In An Eye-Catching Texture

Adorable pompoms dot this chiffon blouse — an eye-catching effect that looks and feels high-end. The crewneck silhouette features long sleeves, slightly bloused at the elasticized cuffs, with a hip-length hem. Let the texture take center stage by styling it untucked with your favorite denim.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 9

A Pleated Midi Skirt You’ll Wear For So Many Occasions

The pleated texture sets this midi skirt apart, and makes it appropriate for so many occasions. Minimalist yet statement-making, you can style the high elastic high-waist silhouette with a button-down for work, or with a silk tank and stilettos for an evening out — you’ll reach for it constantly.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 15

A Satin Robe With Fluttery Sleeves

Toss this robe on after a bath or over a pair of pajamas; the satin fabric makes for your chicest lounging experience ever. Fluttery ruffled three-quarter sleeves zhuzh the otherwise simple silhouette, which features an open wrap front and a tie waist, while a curved hem echoes the delicate sleeves.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 28

A 2-Piece Lounge Set You Can Mix & Match

Comprised of a cropped short-sleeved top and bootcut pants, this lounge set is sure to become a favorite. The soft and stretchy fabric conforms to every body shape, and you can customize the fit by folding the waistline down for a more hip-hugging rise. Chic worn together, you can also split the set up to mix and match within your existing wardrobe.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 12

Sparkling Cubic Zirconia Hoops Plated In Real 14-Karat Gold

Rows of sparkling cubic zirconia ensure these hoop earrings make a stylish statement — and as an ultra-luxe touch, the stones are set in real 14-karat gold plated over sterling silver. The 17-millimeter diameter is understated enough to work in day or evening looks; when going out, highlight the glitter by pairing them with luxe fabrics like velvet or satin.

  • Available colors: 3

A Femme Pullover With Short Ruffled Sleeves

Often little details are give a piece richness — as in this pullover’s short, ruffled sleeves. The detail lends a femme touch to the preppy cable knit detail, while a wide ribbed hem hits at the waist, allowing the silhouette to gracefully blouse, adding unrestrictive, shape-celebrating definition.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — Large
  • Available colors: 11

A Polished Take On The Classic Jogger

For a zhuzhed take on classic sweats, try out these lounge pants. Crafted from ultra-stretchy and soft fabric, with an elasticized drawstring waist, they deliver on comfort — and that slightly tapered leg is low-key polished. They’d be a chic addition to a travel outfit; two deep side pockets have room to stash a passport or phone.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large
  • Available colors: 20

A Knit Poncho For Luxe Layering

Light layering is made chic with the addition of this poncho, crafted from a luxe-feeling knit. Designed with a roomy fit, a split hem, and short sleeves, the piece works with any body shape, and makes it easy to customize coverage. Whether worn as a standalone top or over a T-shirt or turtleneck, the look is polished.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 5

A Sophisticated Twist On The Essential T-Shirt Dress

Every wardrobe deserves a T-shirt dress; this version puts a sophisticated twist on the closet essential with three-quarter sleeves and a slightly flared silhouette that darts in a bit at the waist. The scoop neck silhouette hits just below the knee — a versatile length that’s chic all year long.

  • Available sizes: Small — 3X-Large
  • Available colors: 32

Pointed Loafers So Comfy, You Can Wear Them All Day Long

Not only do these loafers feature a pointed toe — the trending shoe silhouette — they’re comfy enough to wear all day long. Crafted from supple faux leather, they’re designed with a padded insole, high-density cushioning, and a heel pillow, so your feet will be cradled in support; over 7,000 shoppers have given them a five-star rating.

  • Available sizes: 5 — 15 (including select wide sizes)
  • Available colors: 11

A Budget-Friendly Mini Skirt With A Twist

Designed with an asymmetrical wrapped front, this mini skirt puts a literal twist on a timeless design. While it comes in a variety of stylish colors, the plaid print shown provides preppy contrast to the curve-clinging, high-waisted silhouette — ideal for pairing with some on-trend chunky knee-high boots.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 15

A Sheer Mesh Bomber Jacket That Will Have All Eyes On You

In striped sheer mesh, this bomber jacket can’t help but stand out. Designed with a zippered front, the wide ribbed cuffs and hem structure its bloused silhouette; the hem rises up to an inverted V-shape at the center, to subtly highlight the waist — all eyes will surely be on you.

  • Available sizes: Small — X-Large
  • Available colors: 2

A Workout Romper For The Days You’re Feeling Popping

From the front, this would appear to be a cute and minimalist workout romper — but wait until you see it from the back. The scrunch-bottom design gets the booty popping, and criss-cross straps across a low, V-cut back add super-hot detail, in stretchy squat-proof fabric that’s as functional as it is chic.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — Large
  • Available colors: 15

Stretchy Palazzo Pants With 29,000+ 5-Star Ratings

It’s easy to see why these pants have earned over 29,000 five-star ratings; the stretchy fabric is pajama-level comfy, but that high-waisted, wide-legged silhouette is chic enough to wear out for cocktails. Pair these trousers with a tee and sneakers during the day, then swap in a cropped tank and heels once the sun sets.

  • Available sizes: Small — 3X-Large
  • Available colors: 56

A Cardigan That’s Serving Designer Energy

With rounded edges and piped contrasting trim, this cardigan is serving designer energy — but it’s offered at an obscenely low price. Designed with a V-neckline, the soft knit is accented by gold-toned buttons. Contrast the femme knit by pairing it with casual denim and adding a pointy-toed kitten heel.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 11

A Vintage-Inspired T-Shirt Dress

Kicky 60’s-inspired silhouettes are what come to mind when presented with this T-shirt dress thanks to the mini length, mock neckline, and short sleeves. Soft fabric blended with a bit of stretch modernizes the aesthetic, which you’ll find can be styled for day or night by swapping sneakers for stilettos.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large
  • Available colors: 20

A Ruched Crop Top With A Cool-Girl Asymmetrical Neckline

With its ruched bodice and asymmetrical off-the shoulder neckline, this crop top is serving cool girl — just imagine it paired with baggy knee-length shorts and chunky boots. The long-sleeved silhouette is crafted from stretchy fabric, in curve-clinging fit designed to make any wearer look incredible.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — X-Large
  • Available colors: 14

An Office Siren Pencil Skirt That You Can Even Dress Down

Think office siren, but low-key; this midi skirt is crafted from a stretchy ribbed knit that’s slightly more casual than is typical of the style — so you can dress it up or down. The pull-on design features a high waist and a back slit to ensure ease of movement.

  • Available sizes: Small — X-Large
  • Available colors: 12

A Turtleneck Sweater With The Coolest Asymmetrical Hem

Featuring the coolest asymmetrical hem, this sweater is as eye-catching as it is cozy — and the oh-so-soft knit adds to the luxe appeal. It’s designed with drop shoulders and a chunky turtleneck, in an easy fit; allow the unique shape to hog the spotlight by pairing with slim-fitting bottoms.

  • Available sizes: Small — X-Large
  • Available colors: 11

A Bodycon Tank Jumpsuit For A Stylish Base Layer

This jumpsuit is crafted from ribbed fabric generously blended with stretch, for a bodycon fit that stands out when worn singly — and can function as an infinitely customizable base layer. Dress up the square neckline and tank straps by layering a button-down white shirt on top, and add some sleek loafers.

  • Available sizes: Small — X-Large
  • Available colors: 9

A Parisian-Chic Wool-Blend Beret

An icon of Parisian style, the simplicity of this wool-blend beret makes it appear expensive — even though it isn’t. Fleece lining helps keep you cozy on chilly days, and the flexible band stretches for a precise fit; it’s sure to become a regular fixture in cold weather.

  • Available sizes: One size
  • Available colors: 6

A Top In The Coolest Stretchy Pleated Texture

Its stretchy pleated texture is so special, you’d expect to find this long-sleeved top in a higher-end store — but this accessible piece can be on your doorstep in a flash. Designed with a high crew neckline and a hem that hits at the top of the hip, the otherwise simple silhouette gives these pleats the attention they deserve.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 21

High-Waisted Leggings That Shoppers Can’t Stop Buying

Shoppers can’t stop buying these leggings; they’ve won over 38,000 five-star ratings from fans so far. Blended with plenty of stretch, they promise to be comfy whether you wear them for working out or lounging. The wide elastic waistband features gentle compression, so you’ll feel snatched and supported, and there are two deep pockets that hold a lot.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — 4X-Large
  • Available colors: 32

A Quilted Puffer Vest That Brims With Style

From its quilted puffer fabric to the mock neckline and a slightly darted waist, this vest brims with stylish details — and it’s got practical features, too. The zip front allows you to control ventilation, while two zippered side pockets have room to stash your phone or keys.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 18

A Little Black Dress With A Preppy Shirt Collar

With a preppy shirt collar, this little black dress makes a chic addition to your wardrobe. Designed with long sleeves, the mini length provides saucy counterpoint to the otherwise conservative silhouette — but you can make it workplace-friendly by layering it over tights and boots.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large
  • Available colors: 13

Faux Leather Belts That Accessorize Any Outfit

In a pack of two — one black and one tan — these belts can accessorize virtually any outfit in your closet. The slender design is crafted from smooth faux leather, with a gold-toned buckle in a modern open rectangular shape; the clever design snaps into the notches, providing a clean silhouette so no extra strap hangs out.

  • Available sizes: 27-32-inches — 47-50-inches
  • Available colors: 13

A Swiss Dot Chiffon Top For Low-Key Dressing Up

If you’re going for a look that’s dressed up but still low-key, this top is it. The Swiss dot chiffon fabric elevates the simple short-sleeved silhouette, as do the pleats at its scoop neckline. And the bloused fit looks effortless whether worn tucked or loose, so it’ll work with tons of bottoms in your wardrobe.

  • Available sizes: X-Small — 3X-Large
  • Available colors: 19

A Tweedy Jacket With A Pleated Peplum Hem

Crafted from a lush-looking textured knit and accented by gold-toned buttons, this jacket is already eye-catching — and then you notice the sweet pleated hem. A preppy take on peplum, it dresses up denim and has enough structure to pair with more formal trousers; don’t be surprised if it becomes a go-to.

  • Available sizes: Small — XX-Large
  • Available colors: 3

Memory Foam Slippers So Comfy You’ll Never Want To Take Them Off

Lined with plush faux fur and memory foam cushioning, these slippers are so comfy you’ll never want to take them off. The faux suede design features a grippy, no-slip sole to keep you stable when walking on smooth surfaces like tile; they’re so popular that over 8,000 shoppers have given them a perfect rating.

  • Available sizes: 5.5 — 12
  • Available colors: 9
]]><![CDATA[65 Clever New Things On Amazon That Are Legitimately Amazing]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/shopping/clever-new-things-on-amazon-that-are-legitimately-amazinghttps://www.scarymommy.com/shopping/clever-new-things-on-amazon-that-are-legitimately-amazingFri, 13 Dec 2024 23:15:24 GMT
Amazon

You already know that Amazon is a treasure trove of goods that can probably satisfy every one of your possible needs and desires. But because new finds are constantly dropping on the app, the treasures just keep on coming. You could spend hours of your life trying to keep up, or you could skip the endless scrolling and check out my latest list. It’s full of clever, new stuff that’s so amazing you won’t be able to resist hitting Add to Cart on repeat.

A Genius Keychain USB Charging Cord

This is one USB-C charging cord you’ll never lose. That’s because it’s a keychain. And don’t worry about the wear and tear from it getting banged around; it features a braided nylon cable and electroplated zinc cable tips for added flexibility and durability. Just plug it into any power source (like a laptop) for fast-charging results.

A Trendy Satin Pillowcase For Luxurious Sleep

A satin pillowcase is a must for taming frizz, keeping skin creases at bay, and staying cool all night. And this popular pillowcase is about as great as it gets. It’s made from a luxurious 600-thread count satin fabric and features a trendy metallic pastel hue that shoppers are obsessed with. And, yes, it’s totally machine-washable.

  • Available sizes: Standard — King
  • Available colors: 50

A Portable Electronic Cleaning Kit For All Your Tech

Keep all your tech in like-new condition with this must-have keyboard cleaning kit. A variety of precision tools, sponges, and brushes won’t shed or scratch, and they promise to make it easy and safe to clean everything from laptops to earbuds. Plus, everything fits neatly into the carrying case for convenient storage and portability. With a 4.6-star rating after 6,000+ reviews, it’s a cleaning set that will get the job done.

This Clever 2-In-1 Night-Light

This clever night-light takes convenience to the next level. It charges via USB cable so there’s no need to keep it plugged into a socket, and a single charge can last up to 21 days. Then just place it on any flat surface and let the motion sensing do the rest — it can sense movement up to 22 feet away. Or, pop it in your bag so you can use its handy flashlight feature wherever you go.

A Tiered Jewelry Organizer That Rolls Up

Judging by the portable size, you’d never guess that this clever roll-up jewelry organizer contains three roomy tiers — each lined with a soft, suede-like material to protect your valuables. When closed, it looks just like a leather clutch, complete with embossed detail, a convenient snap closure, and a cute tassel. No wonder it has a 4.7-star rating after nearly 5,000 reviews.

  • Available colors: 11

Stylish Earplugs For Calm Vibes

Literally block out the noise with these innovative earplugs. Silicone tips help block up to 17 decibels of noise, providing instant protection and relief. And the loop design, complete with a gold-tone finish, helps them pass for a fashion accessory, which means you can enjoy peace and quiet without sacrificing style.

  • Available colors: 9

A Space-Saving Whisk With A Near-Perfect Rating

With an ingenious, space-saving design, it’s no wonder this two-in-one whisk has earned a near-perfect, 4.7-star rating after more than 5,000 shopper have weighed in. Open it into a balloon shape for perfectly whipped cream or collapse it flat to create luscious sauces (and to save space in your kitchen drawers). Plus, the wires are made from silicone-coated stainless steel for maximum durability with no-scratch benefits.

  • Available colors: 2

A Magnetic Sensory Putty That’s So Fun

Melt away stress and anxiety with this jar of ferrite stones. The naturally magnetic stones cling together like puddy, providing a malleable mass that not only feels good to the touch but also produces a calming sound when rubbed together. They’re especially great for meditating and sensory play, or just for getting kids (or yourself) off screens.

This Best-Selling Suction Phone Mount

Shoppers can’t get enough of this brilliant phone mount. The low-profile design features 24 small but strong suction cups that keep it securely in place practically anywhere (think mirrors, dashboards, pretty much any smooth surface. Just use the adhesive back to peel and stick it to the back of your phone and enjoy the convenience that this best-selling phone mount offers.

  • Available colors: 16

A Foot Scrubber Shower Mat That Shoppers Love

Forget breaking your back or risking a slip and fall in the shower when you can get this clever foot scrubber mat instead. Step onto the soft silicone bristles to treat yourself to a luxurious, exfoliating foot scrub with included acupressure points. Strong suction cups keep it securely in place. As one of the many satisfied shoppers noted, “Love this[...] game- changer for people who have difficulty bending over to scrub your feet, soles, toes while in the shower.”

  • Available sizes: Large — X-Large
  • Available colors: 4

Magnetic Holders For TV Remotes

Never lose your remote controls again with these brilliant magnetic remote holders. Peel and stick half to a flat surface and the other to a remote, then attach them and be wowed by the convenient magnetic tech. With four in a pack and two colors to choose from, there’s one for every remote in the house.

  • Available colors: 2

This Adorable Squishy Panda Night-Light

This cuddly little panda lamp makes for the perfect night-light or reading light. It features dimming capabilities for bright and low light options, and a timer means you can set it and fall asleep knowing it will turn off on its own. Since it’s rechargeable via USB, it’s so easy to toss in a suitcase for light on the go.

An Aesthetic Stationary Set

This aesthetic stationery set has everything a kid or college college student could need or want for school. It comes with a colorful assortment of pastel ballpoint and gel pens, highlights, pencils, and even a carrying case for convenient storage and portability. No wonder so many shoppers are gushing over this essential find.

  • Available colors: 4

Bag Holder For Easier Filling

Trying to get a plastic food storage bag to stay put while you fill it isn’t always easy, making these brilliant bag stands a must-have kitchen gadget. Just adjust the arms to match the bag size (from snack to gallon), then use the clips to secure the ends of the bag to make filling a breeze. With two in a pack, you’ll be able to get so much meal prepping done.

A 3-In-1 Sheet Pan For Less Mess

Why dirty more dishes than necessary when you can cook your entire meal in one pan? Like this absolutely genius divided sheet pan with three separate sections. It's crafted from carbon steel and features a nonstick coating and textured surface, which means it’s durable, easy to clean, and cooks foods evenly.

An Adjustable Food Bowl For Pets Big & Small

This innovative pet food bowl makes mealtime easier and more comfortable for cats and dogs. The 2-cup silicone bowl sits right atop the non-slip base and can be placed flat or at an angle. The best part is that the whole thing is dishwasher-safe, making cleanup a breeze. With more than 2,000 perfect, five-star ratings, this is an yes for pet owners.

  • Available sizes: 1.5 Cup — 5 Cup
  • Available colors: 10

A Tabletop Fire Pit That’s 100% Smokeless

Use this portable indoor/outdoor fire pit for dinner parties, backyard hangouts, and more. It’s made from heavy-duty cement and features a stainless steel liner for added durability and safety. And because it runs on rubbing alcohol, it offers a 100% smokeless and odorless experience. Each burn lasts up to 70 minutes and it comes with a heavy lid to easily extinguish fires.

  • Available colors: 4

A Tenderizer Tool For Perfect Steaks

If you’re still hammering away at your meat to get it nice and tender, it’s time to save your energy and get better results with this highly rated tenderizer tool. It features 24 stainless steel needles that pierce meat without destroying the shape and fibers like traditional meat hammers do. It’s so good that it boasts a 4.6-star rating after more than 2,500 shoppers have weighed in.

  • Available colors: 2

A Lighter Sleeve With All The Tools

This genius tool turns lighters into Swiss Army knives. Simply slide a standard lighter into the sleeve that houses a screwdriver, a mini screwdriver/poker, scissors, knife, and bottle opener. And it’s easy to tote around thanks to the built-in keychain loop. Made of heat-treated stainless steel, it’s sure to last for years.

  • Available colors: 16

A Portable Crock-Pot For On-The-Go Meals

Whether at home, the office, or on-the-go, this portable, 20-ounce food warmer by trusted brand, Crock-Pot, is a must for making meal time easier. The warming base reheats and keeps foods warm for hours. Just plug it in and let it do the rest. And clean up is a breeze too since both the stainless steel pot and inner lid are dishwasher-safe.

  • Available colors: 4

A Food Chopper That Preps It All

This manual food chopper is perfect for meal prep at home or on the go. It features three sharp stainless steel blades that can chop everything from fruit to veggies, and it even separates and whisks eggs. Just turn the smooth handle to operate. Remove the blade and insert the basket to turn it into a salad spinner.

  • Available colors: 3

A 3-Pack Of Garlic Peelers That Are So Easy To Use

Effortlessly peel garlic with this clever three-pack of garlic skin removers. The textured inner surface gently grips garlic skin, peeling it away with each rolling motion. As one shopper explained, “Peeling garlic can be tedious. This little gadget is amazing. Clove is inserted into the peeler, a few rolls back and forth (I use the palm of my hand) and out comes a perfectly peeled clove of garlic. Best thing you didn’t know you needed.”

  • Available colors: 5

Fuzzy Slipper Socks With Rave Reviews

These slipper socks combine the coziness of traditional slippers with the comfort and warmth of crew socks. The outer soles come with extra-grippy tread to keep you securely on your feet, while the socks are made with 2% spandex for easy, stretchy wear. One reviewer noted, “Best slipper socks I have ever purchased! Very reasonable price and they are so comfortable, will be purchasing more for gifts.”

  • Available colors: 10

A Cult-Fave Tumbler With A Super-Smooth Spout

Shoppers are raving over the SmoothSip spout on this tumbler. Everything from the soft feel to the natural shape makes for a comfy drinking experience. Plus, the double-wall stainless steel construction keeps hot drinks at just the right temperature for up to six hours. Choose from four neutral colors.

  • Available colors: 4

Dish Sponges That Looks Like Fruits

These are the cutest dish sponges out there. Each pack includes 10 colorful sponges shaped like strawberries and watermelon slices. The soft fiber construction is designed to gently yet effectively scrub away food and other debris from dishes. When not in use, simply hang them from convenient built-in hooks.

A Sleek Wallet That Holds & Protects It All

This amazing multi-purpose wallet holds it all — from credit cards and cash to passports and even your phone. And it even helps protect from digital theft with the built-in RFID blocking shield. The textured faux leather outer gives it an expensive look and feel but it’s actually really affordable.

  • Available colors: 32

A Microwave Bacon Cooker For Leaner & Less Messy Results

If you love bacon but hate cleaning up the greasy mess from your stovetop, you’re going to go crazy for this clever bacon cooker. It’s designed to quickly and evenly cook 12 pieces of bacon in the microwave while allowing for excess fat to run off of the racks and right into the tray. And clean up is easy, too — simply pop the whole thing into the dishwasher.

A No-Rinse Laundry Soap For Delicates

This laundry soap amazingly requires no rinsing. That’s right, simply soak, wring, and hang dry your clothes. It’s formulated with plant-based ingredients to gently lift dirt and odors and can be used for handwashing or machine cycles. Plus, it’s available in a selection of natural scents, including fig and wild mint.

Floating Book Shelves That Look So Cool

With three silver-toned shelves in a set, you’ll be able to display all your books in such an elegant way. Reviewers report that installation is easy, with all hardware included. Each shelf can hold up to 20 pounds, so they’re guaranteed to hold up to your growing collection.

  • Available colors: 2

Compression Socks For All-Day Support

These highly rated compression socks are just the thing to provide relief to aching, tired legs and feet. They’re constructed from cotton for maximum breathability and offer graduated compression to promote blood flow and circulation from knees to toes. Choose from four neutral colors to match any outfit.

  • Available sizes: Medium — Large
  • Available colors: 4

A Clip-On Book Light That Blocks Blue Light

This book light features an amber glow to protect the eyes from blue light for a calm reading experience. Attach it to your book with the secure, padded clip, adjust the brightness to your preferred level, and use the flexible gooseneck to point the light exactly where you need it. It works so well you’ll want to stay up reading all night.

  • Available colors: 4

A Glue Dot Dispenser For Crafting & More

Whether hanging your kid’s artwork or working on scrapbooking projects, this clever glue dot dispenser is a must. Simply roll it along surfaces to effortlessly dispense glue dots, one at a time. And, if you make a mistake, gently peel the glue dots away and reposition (they won’t leave behind stains or residue).

Rechargeable Hand Warmers For Coffee Lovers

This amazing find may look like giant coffee beans but they’re really electric hand warmers. They charge via USB cable, offering long-lasting adjustable heat. The compact size means that they fit right into the palm of your hand or pockets for convenient carrying. And the magnetic tech helps them stick together when not in use, making them difficult to misplace.

Outlet Adapters With A Wireless Remote

These programmable outlet adapters come with a remote so you can control everything from your lights, TV, and more without ever having to get up (and from up to 100 feet away). Just plug them right into your existing outlets, plug in a lamp (or TV or anything, really), and sync them to the remote to begin using them right away.

A Pizza Cutter That Looks Like Bike

Kids and cycling enthusiasts will get a kick out of this pizza cutter. It looks just like a mini bicycle but instead of wheels, it has two sharp stainless steel cutters that effortlessly create perfect slices — and there’s even a stand to display it when not in use. The best part is that the whole thing can go right into the top rack of your dishwasher for equally effortless cleanup.

An Adjustable Car Tray That’s Holds Your Phone & More

Car cup holders are great but what about a holder that can hold an entire meal (plus your phone)? That’s exactly what this amazing car tray table does. The base fits right into a car cup holder and offers a generously sized tray on a rotating arm that’s adjustable. And it even has a built-in cell phone holder.

An Adapter Cable Kit That Doubles As A Phone Holder

Never be without the right type of charger ever again when you get this awesome adapter cable kit. It converts almost any type of charger so you can avoid the frustration of looking through a tangled mess of cords searching for the right one. And it even comes with a convenient storage case that features a built-in phone holder.

  • Available colors: 2

Personal Ice Cream Maker Mugs

Whip up a single-size serving of your favorite ice cream with a personal ice cream maker. The set includes one powerful ice cream machine and two insulated half-pint mugs that you can pop right into the freezer. It’s fun for the whole family and so easy to use that even the kids can give it a go.

A Reusable Notebook With A Free App

If you like the feeling of taking handwritten notes but want the convenience of a tablet, this amazing reusable notebook is what you’re looking for. It’s the best of both worlds, offering a surface that you can write on and wipe clean — but not before uploading your notes to a cloud using the free app. Plus, the set includes a FriXion pen and a microfiber cloth.

  • Available sizes: Letter — Executive
  • Available colors: 16

Elastic Shoe Laces To Make Every Shoe Slip-On

These innovative shoe laces first premiered on Shark Tank and promise to “turn every shoe into a slip on.” They’re made from super stretchy elastic for the ultimate comfort and flexibility. And since they feature a lightly textured surface, they stay put once tied, making them perfect for kids and adults. They’re available in a range of sizes and colors, so you can outfit the whole family.

  • Available sizes: 24 Inches — 72 Inches
  • Available colors: 15

A Can Opener That Pops The Whole Top

Transform your favorite canned beverages into a wide mouth with this popular topless can opener. The ergonomic handle offers a comfortable grip, while the advanced safety mechanism guarantees a clean and smooth edge. It’s the perfect tool for backyard get-togethers, tailgate parties, camping, and more.

A Brightening Serum That’s A Skincare Staple

This brightening serum can be used just once a week to deliver exceptional results (just take a look at those 2,000+ positive reviews). Formulated with kojic acid, niacinamide, and azelaic acid, it targets discoloration and spots for bright, balanced skin. As one shopper reported, “Goes on smooth, and absorbs in the skin rather quickly. A little goes a long way, no need to cake it on. I would definitely say it is effective and it has become a staple in my skincare routine”

A Misting Spray Bottle That Works From All Angles

Not only does this innovative spray bottle pump out mist so fine that you’d think it was powered by aerosol, but it does that without tiring out your hands. Simply press the feather-light trigger to release a continuous mist — even when held sideways or upside down. It’s perfect for hairstyling, plant care, and more.

  • Available sizes: 10.1 Ounce — 20 Ounces
  • Available colors: 6

The Cuddliest Blanket That Adds Luxe Texture

This is about to become your new favorite blanket that you’ll be reaching for all year round. Yup, it’s that good. Not only is the ribbed fleece ultra plush and cozy, but it’s lightweight and breathable too, offering just the right amount of warmth. And it’s available in a ton of colors and sizes so you can get one for your bed, the couch, and beyond for easy, luxurious texture.

  • Available sizes: Throw — California King
  • Available colors: 27

A Foldable Magnetic Phone Stand That Won’t Slip

Ditch that old phone stand that never seems to grip your phone right for this magnetic version that will literally never let you (aka your phone) down. This phone stand is slim and portable and features an adjustable and sturdy base. But the best part is the strong magnetic design. Just snap your phone on and get on with your business.

  • Available colors: 14

A Mini Paper Shredder That Requires No Batteries

Don’t let your stack of documents to destroy pile up on you. Instead, keep up with the task with this easy-to-use mini paper shredder. It requires no electricity or batteries and works simply by twisting the end to move the paper through the sharp cross-cut blades. It’s a clever tool that’s a must for every household.

A Stainless Steel Ice Roller For Cooling Relief

Everything from puffy eyes to headaches and even sunburns is no match for this highly rated ice roller. It features a stainless steel roller that, when chilled for as little as 15 minutes, offers cool, soothing relief. It’s also designed to help promote blood circulation, for overall healthier feeling and looking skin.

  • Available colors: 3

A Luxe Bamboo Hair Brush Set For A Great Price

The price isn’t the only amazing thing about this hair brush set. The fact that each piece is beautifully crafted from durable and smooth bamboo wood is also sure to wow you. The set includes hair brushes in two different sizes that feature bamboo bristles that won’t damage hair, plus two combs. And it’s suitable for all hair types and lengths.

A Best-Selling Brown Sugar Scrub

Thousands of shoppers are raving over this sugar body scrub. So what’s all the hype about? It’s all in the natural ingredient list that offers up some major skin benefits — like baby-soft skin free of bumps. Brown sugar, sea salt, a blend of soothing oils, and vanilla are the stars of this best-selling skincare find.

A Vanity Mirror That Fits In Your Pocket

If you’re still trying to touch up your makeup using your car’s sun visor mirror, do yourself a favor and upgrade to this portable vanity mirror. It fits right in your pocket but offers big convenience in the form of two mirrors (in 1X and 3X magnification) and bright lights along the borders. Clearly, it’s a best-selling beauty mirror for good reason.

  • Available colors: 15

A Trio Of Versatile Candlestick Holders

These candlestick holders may be pretty (I mean look at that stunning fluted glass), but they have a little surprise that makes them even better than you may have thought. One side is designed to hold classic tapered candles but flip them over and they can hold tealight candles, too. All that plus a wallet-friendly price makes them an amazing find.

  • Available colors: 18

A Playful Tea Infuser That Looks Like a Floatie

At first glance, you may wonder what a pink flamingo is doing floating in a mug. But once you find out that it’s really a tea infuser, you’re going to want to get one for yourself, and probably your BFF, too. Simply twist it open to reveal a stainless mesh filter, add tea, close it back up, and then let it swim (erm, steep) in your mug for a perfectly brewed cup of tea in minutes.

A Zen Pen With A Built-In Diffuser

Just when you thought you’d seen it all, Amazon goes and drops this awesome pen. And it’s not just a pen, it’s also a diffuser. It includes four citrus grove essential oil cartridges to keep you calm while you work. According to shoppers, the ballpoint pen doesn’t disappoint either, offering a smooth writing experience. That’s a whole lotta zen for just $10.

An Innovative Sponge & Holder System

This innovative sponge and holder system is every cleaning fanatic’s dream. The four included magnetized sponges can stick to the two included sink mounts, which means they can dry out quickly. And because each two-sided sponge lasts up to three months, this modern kitchen staple also helps prevent unnecessary waste.

A LEGO Set For Plant Lovers

Building blocks have come a long way since most of us were kids, and this plant lovers set is the proof. Once assembled, you’ll be staring back at an amazing botanical scene. This tiny plants LEGO set is so cute that you’ll want to show it off to friends and family. With 758 pieces in a set, you’ll be building for hours.

A Rice Water Shampoo Bar For Healthier Hair

In addition to being an eco-friendly alternative to bottled cleansers, shoppers say this shampoo bar works wonders on dry, damaged hair. It’s formulated with rice water protein to help cleanse, balance PH, and strengthen hair for silky smooth results. And you’re sure to love the delicate white tea and mandarin scent, too.

A Sticker Printer That’s The Size Of Your Phone

Creating custom labels and stickers is fun and easy with this Bluetooth mini printer. It uses thermal printing technology to expertly print graphics, photos, and more — all effortlessly customizable in the free app. And since it’s not much larger than the average cell phone, you can take it along with you wherever you go.

  • Available colors: 5

A Bottle Stopper That Doubles As A Lamp

Turn almost any bottle into a night-light with this clever bottle stopper that doubles as a lamp. Simply insert the rubber-lined stopper to create an air-tight seal, then tap the top to adjust the color temperature and brightness. It conveniently charges via USB cable, making it easy to keep powered.

  • Available colors: 21

A Jewelry Cleaner For Pro Results In 3 Minutes

This amazing little jewelry cleaner will have your accessories looking like new in no time (3 minutes to be exact). Simply fill the reservoir with jewelry cleaning solution and press start to activate the high-frequency sound waves to dislodge debris from even the hardest-to-reach crevices. Use it on everything from jewelry and makeup brushes to eyeglasses and watch straps.

  • Available colors: 2

A Must-Have 6-In-1 Kitchen Gadget

This brilliant kitchen gadget is perfect for saving space. That’s because it contains six kitchen tools in one portable and easy-to-store keychain design. Tools include a cheese grater, ginger grinder, pizza cutter wheel, bottle opener, vegetable and fruit peeler, and an herb stripper. It’s ideal for small spaces, camping trips, or dorm dwellers.

A Space-Saving Tabletop Ironing Board

This compact ironing board saves space and is easier to move and set up than full-size versions. Simply unfold it to reveal the padded surface that’s the perfect size for ironing just about any item of clothing. The metal iron rest provides a safe and heat-proof place to store your iron.

  • \Available colors: 2

A 2-Pack Of Cap Cages That Goes Right Into The Washer

Now you can toss all those smelly, sweaty caps right into the washer when you use these hat cages. The washer-ready cage creates a protective layer around most-sized caps, helping them keep their shape while getting nice and clean. Just place a cap between the cage, clip it closed, and toss it in the wash.

A Shatterproof Coffee Press With So Many Rave Reviews

Water and your favorite coffee grinds are all that’s needed to make the perfect cup of joe when you use this ingenious portable coffee press. It’s easy to use and features a fine filter that ensures no bitterness or grit. And since it's compact and made from shatterproof Tritan, it’s ideal for taking on the go. One satisfied shopper gushed, “The AeroPress is absolutely worth the hype, especially if you’re picky and want one of the best (if not THE best) tasting brew you can make.”

A Handheld Sprayer Attachment For Toilets

Turn any toilet into a bidet with this best-selling handheld sprayer kit. It’s quick and easy to install and clips right to the toilet tank for easy access (or mount it to the wall). Plus, it features an adjustable water pressure sprayer and a flexible braided stainless steel hose for added convenience and durability.

  • Available colors: 5

A Mini Screwdriver Set The Size Of A Pen

Replacing batteries in your tech or just adjusting your eyeglasses is easy to do when you have the right tools — and this mini screwdriver set has got them all. It’s about the size of a pen and holds 24 mini magnetic bits in shapes to match just about any gadget. It’s a small but amazing tool that you’ll soon thank yourself for snagging.

]]><![CDATA[Relish Trays Are The Real Christmas Day Hero]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/relish-trays-comeback-christmas-food-traditionshttps://www.scarymommy.com/lifestyle/relish-trays-comeback-christmas-food-traditionsFri, 13 Dec 2024 22:21:28 GMT
Lizuca Hila / 500px/500px/Getty Images

Some holiday food traditions last for decades and decades — big punch bowls of eggnog, enormous Thanksgiving turkeys, casseroles galore. But there’s one holiday appetizer that became a bit of a joke for a while there. She was extremely popular in the ‘50s and ‘60s, and she remained a staple throughout the ‘70s and ‘80s as our grandmothers continued to run the holiday dinner show. Then, people scoffed. Charcuterie boards and dips and things stuffed into hollowed-out loaves of bread became the appetizer norm, and somewhere along the way, amidst all of the crescent roll abominations, we lost sight of the true spirit of holiday dinners: the relish tray.

Also known as the “pickle tray,” this is a holiday appetizer that might be part of your life, depending on where you’re from in America. Growing up in the South with a Southern grandmother, I just assumed it was one of those Southern things like green onions and tomato slices at every meal, too.

But when I married into my husband’s family, I learned that his Nana — a born-and-bred Philadelphian — is known for her relish trays. As in, every year, the family tells her not to make it for Thanksgiving or Christmas or Easter, and every year, she pulls her entire silver serving set out and loads it up with olives (both black and green), mini gherkins, and some raw veggies like celery and radishes. She covers it in saran wrap and drives it over to every family dinner, where I find that, more often than not, I am the only one eating it.

Joff Lee/The Image Bank/Getty Images

That’s why you need to be the hero this holiday season and bring a relish tray to every function.

There’s just something about it — it’s the perfect snack plate. And I know, everyone’s out there making rosettes out of salami and sticking cheese into a foam cone the shape of a Christmas tree, but a relish tray is so easy and versatile. All you have to do is pour your items into little dishes and pop a couple of frilly toothpicks or mini forks on the side. They have tons of flavor thanks to all the vinegar and different pickle brines available, and they go with just about anything on the side of a plate. They are a texture explosion — some items on the relish tray crunch, some have a bigger bite than others, and some of them are nice and chewy. It’s a platter ~for the senses.~ Relish trays are a poet’s snack of choice, you know?

Plus, because of the lightness of the items on a relish tray, they make for an impeccable end-of-night snack when the kitchen has been cleared and the board games have been pulled out. Or when it’s 1 a.m. and you’ve had a lot of eggnog.

Costache Hurgoi / 500px/500px/Getty Images

Here are some nice, easy suggestions for your own relish tray:

  • mini gherkins
  • dill pickles
  • olives, black and/or green
  • pearl onions
  • banana peppers
  • pickled onions
  • sliced radishes
  • celery stalks
  • carrot sticks
  • pickled okra
  • baby corn
  • peperoncini
  • bread and butter pickles

Sure, they sort of sound like condiments and burger toppings. But a little side dish of pearl onions and banana peppers? It’s just the perfect little texture and flavor explosion everyone needs after a day full of turkey and pie.

And nothing beats wrapping presents with a relish tray within arm’s reach. Be the hero.

]]><![CDATA[How Do I Navigate Political Differences With My Parents With A Kid Involved?]]>https://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/how-to-navigate-political-differences-with-parentshttps://www.scarymommy.com/parenting/how-to-navigate-political-differences-with-parentsFri, 13 Dec 2024 20:16:19 GMT
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There are about a million reasons the holidays can be one of the most stressful times of the year. The mental load of making sure your kid has a joyful season, the cooking, cleaning, childcare… it's a lot. And one thing I'd like to add to the anxiety of the holidays? The potential stress of family.

Let me start off by saying this: I love my family. My parents are incredibly supportive people who would drop anything to help me, my spouse, or our daughter. But in the past decade or so, my relationship with my dad, in particular, has become strained, and politics are the source of a lot of the tension. For me, our relationship is worth biting my tongue and not bringing up topics where I know we disagree. For him, making his opinion known often takes precedence.

While our strong differences in ideologies could often be overlooked when it was just myself and my husband, it became a lot more complicated when my daughter came into the picture. Right now, she's still quite young, and many things go over her head. Still, we're starting to get to an age where what the adults in her life say to her really matters. And when it's coming from my father, whose ideas and political opinions so differ from how we're raising her, it's a bit of a slippery slope.

I know I'm not alone in this. I've had quite a few conversations with friends who have also had to navigate the awkward dynamic of family get-togethers in the current (to put it lightly) thorny political landscape. But how do we deal with balancing our child's relationship with their grandparent while setting important boundaries in our own family's dynamics? For that, I turned to a professional to help. I spoke with Sandra Kushnir, a licensed marriage and family therapist and founder of Meridian Counseling, about just that.

You don't have to give up the relationship.

If I'm going to get really vulnerable here for a moment, I should say this: After having a kid, I wondered whether the differences in my family were substantial enough that I should pull away from the relationship. It's complicated and scary to say, but I know I'm not alone in feeling this way.

Kushnir suggests it's essential to "prioritize the relationship over the debate" when navigating political differences with a family member, especially your parents. "One effective strategy is to focus on shared values, such as love, respect, and family well-being, rather than the specific issues that divide you," she explained. "It's OK to acknowledge that you may never fully agree, and that's perfectly normal. Aim for mutual understanding rather than persuasion."

As for a good way to do that, she recommended practicing active listening. What that means is you need to sit and listen to the person's perspective without immediately coming in with a rebuttal. This can help to reduce tension and foster a sense of empathy.

That said, if you feel like the healthiest thing for you and your child is to take a step back from the relationship with your parents, it’s also your prerogative to do so.

You can (and should) set boundaries.

While maintaining a relationship is important, setting boundaries (especially with a kid involved) is also very much acceptable. "Setting boundaries is a crucial part of protecting your child's emotional well-being and upholding your values as a parent," says Kushnir. "Boundaries are not acts of rejection or disrespect; rather, they are acts of love and self-respect."

Specifically, she shared that if certain discussions or behaviors from a grandparent could cause confusion, anxiety, or distress for a child, setting limits is not only OK — it's necessary. As for how to approach this, she recommended communicating those behaviors clearly, calmly, and assertively. "For example, you might say, 'We're teaching our child to approach others with kindness and empathy, so we ask that conversations about certain topics be avoided around them,'" she recommends. "The goal is to create a healthy and safe environment for your child, not to control your parents."

If there are certain topics you don't want to be brought up in front of your child, approaching that conversation with clarity and compassion is key. "Start by affirming your respect for your parents and their role as grandparents, but also make it clear that as a parent, you have the final say in how your child is exposed to certain topics," Kushnir says. She emphasized that using "I" statements helps to reduce defensiveness.

And if they push back? "You can remind them that this boundary isn't about shutting them down but about honoring your role as the parent. Consistency is key — if they see you enforce this boundary consistently and respectfully, they're more likely to honor it over time."

Choose your battles.

Kushnir acknowledged that navigating political differences in a family setting can be emotionally exhausting. For that reason, she also reminded me that not every disagreement needs to be addressed. Choosing your battles, as it were, can be vital to making sure your most important conversations are heard and understood.

Additionally, she stressed the importance of modeling respectful disagreement. For topics where there is a conversation in front of a child, she recommended engaging in respectful dialogue, even if it's something you don't agree with. Kids can mirror behavior and take in what they're watching, so making sure they can see a civil discourse can be beneficial to their development.

But what if there are still issues? She recommends seeking support if necessary: "If the political differences are causing significant distress in your relationship with your parents, consider seeking support from a family therapist. Having a neutral third party involved can make it easier to establish and maintain boundaries while preserving family bonds."

I don't know that I'll ever fully be able to get the nervous pit out of my stomach when it comes time for a family get-together, but going in with a plan is my first step to navigating a difficult situation.

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