Blog Archives

From 2002 to 2013, wonko.com was a blog. These days I do my blogging on Medium. My old pre-Medium blog posts are archived here. Many of them are stupid. I'm sorry.

• Crass: A Ruby CSS Parser
• Add the tools your toolbox lacks
• On working remotely
• rawgithub.com
• How to run Continuum (SubSpace) on a Mac
• Pie Trip Down Under
• Video: When Not to Use YUI
• Respawn
• When Not to Use YUI
• Speeding up SmugMug Search
• Feeling smug
• On Leaving Yahoo!
• Extending JavaScript natives
• Google+ Pages don't make any sense
• Connecting the dots
• Apathetic
• Simple makefile to minify CSS and JS
• Steve Jobs on programmer productivity
• Why loading JavaScript over SSL from a third-party CDN is a bad idea
• There's more to HTML escaping than &, <, >, and "
• Larch 1.1.0 released
• Sanitize 2.0.0 released
• Introducing YUI 3 AutoComplete
• Privileges, rights, and the slippery slopes that surround them
• "No thanks, I've already had cancer, just feel me up or whatever."
• Why I will avoid flying from now on
• Achieving Performance Zen with YUI 3
• What's happening at Yahoo!
• Dissection of a recruiter email
• On the YUI Blog: Mobile browser cache limits: Android, iOS, and webOS
• Steve Jobs on privacy
• How to succeed at privacy
• YUI!
• Ruby script to retrieve and display Comcast data usage
• Read about Storage Lite on YUIBlog
• Monkeypatch to fix Ruby Net::IMAP + Dovecot response parsing bug
• Sanitize 1.2.0 released
• Etherpad source includes JSMin, which Google Code doesn't allow
• JSMin isn't welcome on Google Code
• History Lite: A lightweight Ajax browser history module for YUI 3
• Sanitize 1.1.0 released
• Context clues
• Backup software comment roundup: people love to hate Mozy
• LazyLoad 2.0.0 released
• Chase followup: the check's in the mail
• Chase will keep taking your money after your account is closed
• Yahoo! Search Pad: Using client-side storage to improve user experience
• VistaPrint condones spam, but doesn't approve of my mothering skills
• The Adventures of Qubit: Episode III
• Vitriol never helps
• The Adventures of Qubit: Episode II
• The Adventures of Qubit: Episode I
• Larch 1.0.1 released
• A decade of wonko.com
• On second thought...
• Switching Portlands
• Larch mailing list
• HTPC bliss with a Mac Mini and Plex
• Larch syncs messages from one IMAP server to another
• Pretty JSLint output for TextMate
• Sanitize 1.0.6 released
• It's never easy
• Working from home
• Old Search Assist interaction screencast from Designing Web Interfaces
• Sanitize 1.0.5 released with a security fix
• Screenshot tour of Thoth
• Sanitize 1.0.4 released with a security fix
• Sanitize 1.0.3 released with a security fix
• Seven things
• How to compile and install Ruby 1.9.1 on Mac OS X Leopard
• Chase is confused
• Sanitize: A whitelist-based Ruby HTML sanitizer
• Snow!
• Tracking Change.gov revisions using git
• Trogdor: Burninatingly fast search using Yahoo! BOSS
• How to prevent race conditions when loading CSS with the YUI Get Utility
• jsmin.rb 1.0.1 released
• My car is titleless
• So long, Dash
• Inquisitor now available for Firefox and IE
• Going home
• Thoth 0.2.1 released
• Thoughts on the Dash Express
• Like a record
• Optimizing Yahoo! Search for the iPhone
• Yahoo! Search brings Search Assist, SearchMonkey, and more to the iPhone
• Enough already with the email newsletters
• Why you probably shouldn't use cookies to store session data
• Try to use one var statement per scope in JavaScript
• LazyLoad 1.0.4 released
• How to install the MySQL/Ruby gem on Mac OS X Leopard
• UPS has invented time travel
• PlayStation 3 video store is a disappointment
• Monkeypatch if you must, but do it responsibly
• New look
• FedEx has invented either invisibility or time travel or both
• Privnote's developers are confused
• War Rocket Ajax Mark II
• Mouse interference
• Thoth 0.2.0 released
• Out of site
• Kudos to Apple for not supporting IE6 with MobileMe
• Job hunting tip: don't stalk your interviewers
• IM conversation of the day
• Listening habits
• Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of What the Fuck
• Customer service
• SearchMonkey launch party at Yahoo! HQ
• Why it's a bad idea to make a browser part of the OS
• Ramaze is beautiful
• Bee mystery
• WordPress still sucks
• The Worst Journey in the World
• Thoth 0.1.4 released
• Thoth 0.1.3 released
• Evil Gmail quota
• blink tag compatibility script
• CrashPlan status report: still awesome
• Thoth 0.1.2 released
• More on the Safari 3.1 keypress change
• Safari 3.1 breaks keypress events
• Thoth 0.1.1 released
• Riposte is now Thoth
• Are you awesome? Yahoo! Search wants you.
• ilovewonko.com
• IE8 might not suck after all
• jsmin-php 1.1.1 released
• Sketchy recruiting tactics
• Poetry gets results
• Dash not-so-express
• Blu-ray wins
• Let the code speak for itself
• A few more details on Thoth and Ramaze
• Same old skin, shiny new guts
• Microsoft to push IE7 as an automatic update
• Quicken Online rocks
• Code aesthetics
• Why I lack sleep
• Lazyweb: please fix my broken eyeballs
• Xbox Live is a delicate flower
• WordPress sucks
• Header photos
• Internet Explorer 8 doesn't matter
• War Rocket Ajax takes a hit
• Gaia Online is doing awesome things with LazyLoad
• Why Assassin's Creed fails
• Rock Band is almost perfect
• Ports freezes suck
• Our first earthquake!
• Moving forward
• Ruby script to sync email from any IMAP server to Gmail
• Gmail + IMAP == <3
• Location-based mailing addresses suck
• Portal rocks on toast
• Things you may not have noticed about Yahoo! Search Assist
• SftpDrive rocks
• Headlights: a beginner's guide
• FedEx has graciously donated my new speakers to someone else (update: resolved!)
• Team Fortress 2: still vaporware
• Grub horror
• CrashPlan: the backup tool for the lazy paranoid
• Warhawk is the first killer game for the PS3
• Content-aware image resizing
• Movie theatres are deprecated
• Levitz sucks
• New YUI Compressor tool released
• badparking.org
• Improving e's performance
• The sad state of text editors on Windows
• Yahoo! oneSearch is now enhanced for the iPhone
• Things that suck about the iPhone
• Evil rodent
• The JavaScript Module Pattern
• The death of privacy
• JyteKeys adds hotkeys to Jyte
• My boring-ass commute
• Google Code doesn't want me anymore
• Painless JavaScript lazy loading with LazyLoad
• recharge plz
• Lightning: 1, Jesus: 0
• An inconvenient bill
• First impressions of Yahoo!
• Minify 1.0.1 released
• A faster JSMin library for PHP
• The people who answer the phones at Oregon's Salem DMV office rock
• Minify combines, minifies, and caches JavaScript and CSS files on demand to speed up page loads
• A series of hexadecimal numbers for your enjoyment
• Equifax has refused to put a fraud alert on my credit report
• T-Mobile's cell coverage sucks
• Remote JavaScript includes without the performance penalty (part 2)
• Remote JavaScript includes without the performance penalty (part 1)
• How to make Postfix and SpamAssassin play nicely when using SPF
• I spoke too soon
• Residential broadband in the Silicon Valley sucks ass
• I love E
• Top five reasons why losing your wallet the day before starting a new job and renting a house while relocating to a new state is lots of fun
• No millions for me
• Just my luck
• SF Bay Area bandwidth
• Comment spammers are easy to fool
• Yahoo!
• JyteBot
• No God of War II for me.
• The glasses, they do nothing!
• How not to write a JavaScript trim function
• Mozy makes good
• It turns out Mozy isn't so hot after all
• George Lucas is a moron
• Consolas is rocking my world
• Smokin' Aces
• Carbonite responds
• Mozy > Carbonite
• My favorite film score of all time
• You got grammar
• An email to Carbonite CEO David Friend
• Flickr and EXIF location data
• AIM protocol change breaks Miranda
• Acunetix SiteAudit: The preferred website security auditing service of lesbians, ninjas, and farm animals
• iPhone confusion
• iPhone? Yes please.
• PlayStation 3 impressions
• HD DVD is worth it
• The Bounty (the movie)
• The Bounty
• The Wii is mine
• Four-and-a-half out of five senses ain't bad
• A lesson in parking lot etiquette
• Net::Amazon::S3 0.1.0
• Crackup 1.0.1
• Best. Bond. Evar?
• My Christmas list
• Crackup 1.0.0
• Slashdot overflows its comments table
• Sony Engrish
• Pelican swallows pigeon
• Wasted coffee
• Crackup: Crappy Remote Backup
• I want to taste New Coke
• Lederhosen
• "Click here to add a description"
• Plan my vacation
• Amazon S3 doesn't make a good first impression
• Video demonstration of reverse teamkilling
• Google Reader++
• Jetpants turns one (and has its first cancellation)
• WordPress VIP Hosting is a ripoff
• Reverse teamkilling
• The Flickr API hates me
• Jetpants is profitable!
• Aspirin is 80 times more deadly than terrorism
• Half Ass Road is a closely-guarded secret
• The Mystery of Half Ass Road
• Post CDXLVI, in which I succumb to the pleadings of my inner speed demons and purchase another WRX
• Dirac Angestun Gesept
• How to block "INVESOTR ALERT!" image spam with SpamAssassin
• The difference between a div and a span
• DenySSH: Block SSH brute force attacks using PF
• Postfix
• How to gain a customer in one easy step
• What's with UPS lately?
• Time to switch hosting providers
• Sidekick app #2: Alarm Clock
• Developing for the Sidekick 3
• Sidekick 3 first impressions
• Picasa, SmugMug, and Flickr
• Superman Returns
• How not to get a job
• Treasure!
• A coffee conundrum
• Remo Williams delivers
• MediaWiki is an ugly mess
• Oregon is trying to kill your children
• Ebola: a review
• Nothing to write
• Clipboard Inspector
• Welcome to the land of the free...
• Ebola book
• FIOS denied
• Xbox 360 impressions
• FIOS install scheduled!
• FIOS inches closer
• Google Calendar
• Spam statistics
• The world's most ergonomic trackball has been discontinued
• Headshot! Praise the Lord!
• What Would ***** Do?
• Sun: 1, wonko: 0
• Seven years of wonko.com
• My WRX is famous
• GuiltBSD
• Someone give the President a cookie
• I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more tags
• V for Vendetta
• Blogs are better than resumes
• The secret of the NES Zapper
• A referrer spam technicality
• On badly written programming articles
• Loren can actually cook now
• My new Alienware Sentia m3400
• DVD
• Ah, employment. We meet again.
• Cooking with Brunslo!
• Audioblogging, podcasting, whatever
• Temperature regulation
• Why I've avoided Ruby on Rails
• Powdered sugar is bad, mmmkay?
• Censorship shmensorship
• What's with all the blurry license plates?
• Why online video sales won't take off (yet)
• It is now a federal crime to annoy someone online in the US
• King Kong
• Ah, unemployment. We meet again.
• Dating a stereotype
• <3 WoW FTW!
• PHP's developers finally learn why namespaces are a good idea
• How not to get hired by Google
• Mission: Xbox 360
• I hate you, PayPal
• I'm addicted to information
• Agh agh agh Ghostwheel is dying
• Little Blue Car
• Civilization IV
• 5 things I hate about Ruby
• All the leaves are brown, etc.
• ReferrerCop.org
• Dogs, or: why I can't get any damn sleep
• Murder simulators
• ReferrerCop 1.0.4
• My sick ear
• My sick relatives
• WordPress's idea of SQL injection security: addslashes
• Day of Defeat: Source
• A Simple and Elegant PHP/MySQL Web Application Framework, Part 3: My God, it's Full of Objects!
• A Simple and Elegant PHP/MySQL Web Application Framework, Part 2: Getting Started
• A Simple and Elegant PHP/MySQL Web Application Framework, Part 1: The Problem
• ReferrerCop 1.0.3
• Jetpants to the rescue
• Screw this DSL shit, I'm pulling out the big guns
• Listen carefully, IMDB: popup ads piss people off
• Odditorium or Warlords of Mars
• Arr you or arr you not a pirate?
• Comment spam defeated by...a cookie?
• Some kid, or: why my apartment complex sounds like whiny screeching death
• Dogs, or: why my apartment complex smells of poop
• I couldn't resist; validmyass.org is now a reality
• Valid XHTML my arse
• wonko.com gets a facelift (and liposuction)
• Somebody Else's Problem
• Jesus fucking shit we're all dead
• Mozilla Firefox 1.5 Beta 1 Release Candidate?
• Listen up spiders: I hate you
• Final Poseidon status update (plus whining)
• Flickrfied photoblog
• Packet loss
• Back from Hawaii (with lots and lots of pictures)
• What should I do with intertron.org?
• Impeccable timing
• WRX accident #5
• How not to win back the hearts of web developers
• Zoom zoom.
• Box office slump? Yeah, and Bill Gates is on welfare.
• Big Damn Heroes
• Monkeys get an Ebola vaccine; the rest of us are still screwed
• Say goodbye to referrer spam with ReferrerCop
• Serenity
• Let's not get too hasty now
• Poseidon performance
• No Pants Day!
• The future of Poseidon
• The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
• Serenity Trailer
• Downloading music is okay! Just don't upload.
• Wikipedia knows the shit
• Luecke
• "How dull it is to pause, to make an end..."
• "To sail beyond the sunset, and the baths of all the western stars..."
• MozUpdate is dead
• In which we learn that wonko is an evil, cold-hearted young whippersnapper
• Enough already with the fan films
• Hooray for pi
• A brief comparison of cross-platform GUI toolkits (from Ruby's perspective)
• Love, thy name is Ruby
• Seeing poor performance using PHP's echo statement? Here's why.
• Speakeasy is being poopy
• MusicSync
• T-Mobile website still chock full of SQL injection vulnerabilities
• The Zutons; The Secret Machines; Medeski, Martin & Wood
• Kasabian
• Comcast vs. Speakeasy
• XMLHttpRequest, savior of the Internets
• National Pie Day
• T-Mobile's response
• Amazing new super-ultra-hyper video compression technology! It sounds so good it MUST be true!
• Pie Trip 2.5
• An email to T-Mobile
• In which wonko bravely ventures into the unknown territory of his television's labyrinthine service menus and emerges victorious, if a bit sore
• Christmas loot
• In which I defeat the draconian Christmastime security measures of the apartment office and claim my rightful property without sustaining a single injury
• Random encounter with the ghost of Barry White
• All I want for Christmas
• The WRX takes another hit
• Fireants
• Half-Life 2. Finally.
• Lime: Lightweight Mobile Email
• Valve Software, Half-Life 2, and Steam
• I can see clearly now
• My defective eyeballs
• Ack
• Yahoo! News predicts the future, calls election for Bush
• Marie Callender's yummy frozen dinners
• I am connected!
• No DSL for me
• Fire sauce reserves dwindling...must...replenish...
• Foot-biting attack kitten of DOOM
• A new apartment
• A wildly productive Sunday
• A wildly productive Saturday
• Digital audio bliss (complete with blue LED)
• Gmail has stolen my heart
• George Lucas on altering classic movies
• Back from the dead
• After much gnashing of teeth, Gentoo has finally won me over
• A whole sentence (fragment) all about me
• Post CCXLVII, in which wonko confesses a secret crush on Rebecca Pidgeon
• New feature: Photoblog
• A Qubit, by any other name
• Nokia 6600 (or: the fruits of SMS spam)
• SMS Spam (thanks, T-Mobile)
• Speed + water = fun and bruises
• Independence Day 2004 (with Eric and Notorious R.O.S.S.)
• Loren Bruns: Future President?
• Spider-Man 2 (plus: delicious pie)
• Ghostwheel's growing pains
• For want of a $10 bill
• Fun with Windows Media Encoder, or: Free cable TV for wonko
• War Kayaking
• Thoughts on alcohol and drunkenness
• Pie Trip II: Grandma's House to Portland
• Firefox 0.9 rocks my socks
• Franz Ferdinand
• Pie Trip II: The Video
• Pie Trip II: Dollywood to Grandma's House
• Pie Trip II: Oshkosh to Dollywood
• We're back
• Not quite dead yet
• Pie Trip II: Portland to Wisconsin
• Pie Trip II begins!
• A Succinct Guide to Trench Wars Badassery
• The most entertaining author what ain't dead yet
• Pie Trip II: Pre-production
• An Artsy Black and White Film
• Replay: for fast-acting relief from symptoms of regret and apathy.
• Wonkette
• Using XSLT as a PHP template engine
• Software maintenance woes
• The shortfalls of imapproxy, or: wonko looks a gift horse in the mouth
• Four Days of the Condor, or: wonko plays it safe
• I want FreeBSD to bear my children
• April Fools (plus: wonko gets a bike)
• Happy birthday wonko.com
• Window destroys door; wonko forced to exercise
• Lucida v0.1 released
• Pie Trip II Trailer
• Memory (and my lack of it)
• Post-release movie alterations, or: Why, Nicholas Meyer, why?
• Homing pigeons beat DSL for overall bandwidth
• Play Zork and other Infocom classics over IM
• MailFeed: Read your email via RSS
• Unreal Tournament 2004: Now available at a store near you (but not Best Buy)
• Bush's misleading and illegal tendencies, or: This ain't no blowjob
• Spartan is good stuff; can't wait for Sky Captain
• Brunslo is my hero, but he smells of vinegar
• Pittock Mansion
• Ryan's Anti-Virus Recipe
• On blogging
• Day Three: In which I am introduced to Big Brother
• Day Two: In which I learn that day one was just an introduction to an introduction
• Day One: SAS is big. Really big. No, really really big.
• Silly questions relating to air travel
• Some thoughts on ergonomics
• A helpful tip
• Why can't I just have nightmares like normal people?
• Phoenix -> Firebird -> Firefox
• Movie Round-Up: February 3, 2004
• wonko discovers Patrick O'Brian (thank you Peter Weir)
• Once more unto the breach, dear friends...
• wonko's Big East Coast Adventure, Part III
• wonko's Big East Coast Adventure, Part II
• wonko's Big East Coast Adventure, Part I
• Ghostwheel Filesystem Benchmarks
• Name wonko's new God-box
• Bill of Rights (void where inconvenient)
• Movie Round-Up: January 19, 2004
• m0n0wall, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways...
• Best WRX EVAR
• Best weather EVAR
• Uptime down the drain
• Movie Round-Up: January 5, 2004
• Sleep
• Something or nothing?
• Buy this game
• Running: Not a Good Idea
• Pageophobia
• Measuring ambient temperature using your CPU's built-in thermistor
• MozUpdate 1.4.0
• Why movies cost so much, or: If Kevin Smith can do it, I can do it
• Ebola vaccine! Ebola vaccine! We're saved!
• Two movies, one sucked
• A story of garbage and pies
• Hollywood Crack Exchange
• I hate this bug
• Sitcom loneliness angst
• Boss mode
• Microsoft is from Mars, open source is from Venus
• I found Jebus on Halloween
• X-file of the week: Qubit's bug infestation
• How to eliminate EXCEPTION_ACCESS_VIOLATION errors when using SQL-DMO with VB
• The saga of my Indy DVDs, or: Inefficiency kills baby seals
• Qubit: Funkcat Fantastica
• Movie industry pirates own movies, blames consumers
• An otherworldly evening rain
• It's the future! Just look at the hospitals!
• Bowling for Hypocrisy
• iTunes, meet Windows
• Bad puppy, no treat
• Using Netstumbler with a Netgear WG511 PC card
• Kill Bill Volume 1
• Take my government. Please.
• I wish I lived in Alaska
• Bubba Ho-tep
• LazyFTP
• What'll it be, Comcast? Paper or no paper?
• m0n0wall
• Life, I have been thinking again, and I think that I am not impressed.
• Future, here I come
• RIAA gets a taste of their own medicine
• Kensington Microwave Finder
• Intarweb, here I come
• Hello sparks, goodbye computer
• How to lose a customer in one easy step
• Moving, dinnertime conversation, and things
• Our nonexistent haunted house
• House of Leaves
• Make Ryan Rich
• A house for wonko
• Disappearing DNS-based Blackhole Lists
• W32/Sobig.F wants me to go to college
• The "How Stupid Are You?" Stare
• A Subaru WRX and a Curvy Mountain Road
• The Pie Trip
• The Pie Trip Diaries, Days 3 & 4: August 12th and 13th, 2003
• The Pie Trip Diaries, Day 2: August 11, 2003
• The Pie Trip Diaries, Day One: August 10, 2003
• Yay for self-service
• Pie trip underway; Still in Oregon
• Beach trip, pie trip, happy happy wonko
• Prorated bandwidth on demand
• Pie trip canceled; help me save my vacation
• Mark Olver: Stupendous Badass
• PCEZ: Worst. ISP. Ever.
• I could make movies. Or I could just watch them...
• Hello ducklings. I am kitten.
• Thumbsucker
• The Pie Trip: Planning Stages
• Battle Royale
• wonko's Guide to Awkward Social Encounters, Chapter XXXIV
• The incredibly obvious secret to good storytelling
• The good toothbrush conspiracy
• Name wonko's new kitty
• Life, or something not quite entirely unlike it
• Todo: A cure for procrastination?
• Verdict: Guilty as charged
• I want a pony
• Don't dream and drive
• Sidekicked Sidekick
• The 25th hour, or: Why the work day should end at lunchtime
• Earthquake or lack of food?
• Mozilla's Microsoftian legal tactics, or: Why I'm full of hate
• A Tale of Two Toilets
• Why I write software in my spare time
• Hand me that baby, I need to make an illegal left turn
• Dot: A Review
• Brain partitioning for fun and profit, or: How to have fun all the time and still get paid
• Four years of wasted bandwidth
• A lively fireside chat on April Fool's Day
• Webcams and eyeballs
• i am gorilla fling poo far fly poo fly yay poo good
• Fighting the omnipresent media bias
• Flash! Ah-ahh! He'll save every one of us!
• Books every self-respecting geek needs to read
• Fruit flies like a banana
• Universe == doughnut
• User karma: myth or reality?
• How I learned the secret of the pendulum from Japanese playground equipment
• Throw out your old IM client. Miranda kicks its ass.
• Steal from the rich and sell on eBay
• The source shall set you free
• Thermostat malfunction fries office workers, dog
• Mozilla Mail redirect bounty
• Take that, insurance company
• Three cheers for Uncle Sam
• I do not speak Elbonian
• My morning commute, or: Why I hate invisible traffic cops
• A sink and a urinal
• Don't Panic
• Christian alternative music world, meet Ryan Grove
• A nifty link button compliments of punchcard
• Ebola: the driving force behind the Axis of Evil
• Microsoft Man Number One
• Move along, nothing to see here
• Software engineer fails to properly operate field
• Software engineer fails to properly operate bridge
• Software engineer fails to properly operate ground
• Software engineer fails to properly operate toilet
• Software engineer fails to properly operate ham
• Software engineer fails to properly operate cake